This Poem was Submitted By: Debbie L Fischer On Date: 2003-08-10 19:54:05 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Symphony

The radio hums softly the sounds of Mozart Cruising contently the backroads to home Eying the pastures and cornfields shadowed by dusk Inhaling the scent of freshly cut hay and honeysuckle blossoms Soul-dancing with fireflies that light up the night I am refreshed this sultry summer evening 

Copyright © August 2003 Debbie L Fischer


This Poem was Critiqued By: Jennifer j Hill On Date: 2003-09-04 21:13:40
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.29091
Debbie, this is whole reason I love poetry. To me there is nothing more refreshing to my spirit than poetry that brings my senses into play. As I read your poem I imagine driving down a country road and I can hear the Mozart playing and smell the mingled aroma's of the freshly cut hay and honeysucle. I can picture the fireflys in my minds eye and it gives me a peaceful free feeling. Now that is my kind of poetry. This is the symphony of the senses. I will want to keep a copy of this one to read when I'm feeling stressed and want to relax. You could even throw in a line about holding your hand out the window to feel the summer night air as you drive. lol. OF course you don't really need to change a thing. It's lovely as is. The structure is pleasing to the eye and flows smoothly when read aloud. Thanks for posting this delightful piece. Blessings, Jennifer


This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas H. Smihula On Date: 2003-09-04 18:21:34
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.14634
Beautiful you have placed me in the setting I am riding with you. I am not in a hurry and very content on watching the surroundings, carefree but satisfied. As night approaches the smell and other visions capture the senses. My favorite stanza is in regards to the Soul dancing you have introduced. Well done with a very nice structure I like two line stanza’s when done correctly, good ending, more than a symphony to me. Thanks for sharing, Tom
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2003-08-22 09:12:35
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.01786
lovely way to end a day...relaxing on a back road with the music softly playing your favorite tunes and the fireflies dancing around you....such images you present with the flare of your pen my friend and the structure which allows for such a good read.....makes one want to go out and ride for hours in the night air on one of those back roads that surrounds my entire area.....thanks for posting, be safe, God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: Andrea M. Taylor On Date: 2003-08-18 20:06:44
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.37838
Debbie, I can almost feel the warm breeze teasing your face as it crosses through open windows. I sense your eyes gazing and your mind savoring a routine trip with renewed vision. A trip more of us should take. Thank you for sharing this. Andrea
This Poem was Critiqued By: Erzahl Leo M. Espino On Date: 2003-08-14 06:19:57
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.77778
Hi Debbie, “Symphony” --- Truly, this is a work of art! From the title itself, your poetic prowess already radiates. Appropriate choice! I like how you cut your journey line after line, exposing the beauty of that great summer nights. “The radio hums softly the sounds of Mozart” --- Your soft introductory line gently slides through music, and that classical music just adds sweet flavor to your juicy work. “Cruising contently the backroads to home” --- For me the word “home” is already a poetry. Your personal touch of sensitivity creates a dramatic impact to the entire poem. “Eying the pastures and cornfields” --- I enjoyed the panoramic view! This is visually beautiful and nostalgic! --- I believe a typo error for “Eying” to “Eyeing”. “shadowed by dusk Inhaling the scent of freshly cut hay and honeysuckle blossoms” --- I find this nature-inspired apparition so very haiku-like. For a haiku fanatic like me, this is an inspiration! The images are truly a gem! “Soul-dancing with fireflies that light up the night” --- Enthralling! Stirring every sensation that I knew! I enjoy the imagery! Nice selection of words…very inter-related! Unforgettable! “I am refreshed this sultry summer evening” --- Excellent! You easily executed a wonderful ending! It comprehensively summarized your passion and ecstasy! “Sultry summer evening” will never be the same! Kudos on your wonderful work here Debbie! You never fail to inspire us with your simple but striking piece of art. You hit it straight to our hearts! Looking forward to read more of you work. Outstanding! As always, Erzahl :)
This Poem was Critiqued By: Brandon Gene Petit On Date: 2003-08-13 22:55:36
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.50000
Good sceney in this one ... I'm partial to rural settings. Driving down a rural path on a cool late afternoon, entranced by classic music quietly humming on the radio. I could picture that! Good job. - Brandon
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