This Poem was Submitted By: Donna L. Dean On Date: 2003-10-13 02:27:10 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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My Muse

My muse inspires me when I do not have  a pen and paper. My muse inspires me when I am driving and  cannot write. My muse inspires me when  I am too tired to write. I wish my muse was more  accommondating. Sometimes my muse gives me ideas, but I can only form them in a mediocre way on paper. They are formed  nicely in my head. I think  no one can see the gensis there. My muse is a woman, but  sometimes a man--young, old  and in between.  A deep thinker, morose at sometimes, happy at best. My muse is not wealthy,  which is ironic for I have  never known wealth. My muse just now told me he might  inspire me to write about a  wealthy gentleman. I don't know how, since he has never known wealth. Sometimes he thinks he is so  clever. But that always remains to be seen. My muse isn't a certain color,  unless the color various will do. He isn't fat nor thin. He or she loves to bite into a meaty poem though. My muse laughs at me at times  for not writing when I should. And cries for me at other times when I do. She also wishes I had better penmanship since I write in longhand before I type. My muse wishes I would venture  out on a limb once in a while.  But I was pushed off a diving board when I was nine and fought with all my might to break the surface,and once I made it  to the edge of the pool the instructor couldn't see my  tears because my face was wet. But unlike me who never returned to the diving board my muse keeps coming back for more.

Copyright © October 2003 Donna L. Dean


This Poem was Critiqued By: Sherri L Smith On Date: 2003-10-26 20:02:19
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dear Donna, Your muse must have a twin, cause that one lives in my house! The best things are brought to me in the dead of night when I am nice and comfy in my bed, or when I am on the road with nothing to write with and my memory stinks! I think, oh I will remember that, but of course being the age that I am, I don't! This one really struck home to me, and am glad to know that I am not the only one to have the problems that I have with my muse! Very cleverly done and nicely worded. It was a good read and I enjoyed it very much. Sherri


This Poem was Critiqued By: Rebecca B. Whited On Date: 2003-10-24 21:38:42
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Oh Donna, don't we all wish our muses were more accommodating? It never fails that I have wonderful thoughts running through my head, as well, but, most times, forget them just as quickly as they popped into my head...I hate it when that happens! 'My muse is a woman, but sometimes a man--young, old and in between. A deep thinker, morose at sometimes, happy at best.' I love these lines, as they so aptly describe my muse! Sometimes, I even imagine mine to be an alien! LOL 'My muse is not wealthy, which is ironic for I have never known wealth. ['My muse just now told me he might'...for some reason this seems forced to me...Perhaps it could read, 'My muse told me, just now, he might'...kind of adds an element of surprize to the line, a little punch, if you will, informing the reader of your muse's ability to inspire at random, in a quick manner...just a thought] inspire me to write about a wealthy gentleman.' [I like the way this leads into your 'venturing out on a limb']. I love this stanza: 'My muse isn't a certain color, unless the color various [clever! I like 'color various'] will do. He isn't fat nor thin. He or she loves to bite into a meaty poem though.' [don't we all love those meaty poems?...mine are often far and few between...LOL]. "My muse wishes I would venture out on a limb once in a while. But I was pushed off a diving board when I was nine and fought with all my might to break the surface,and once I made it to the edge of the pool the instructor couldn't see my tears because my face was wet." [my, you have informed the reader of alot here...the fear of the unknown, unfamiliar things that makes one remain within their safety zone, rather than venture out onto new horizons! I like "the instructor couldn't see my tears because my face was wet.'good imagery that solicits pity from the reader. Your last lines say it all! Your muse keeps coming back for more, in spite of the fact that sometimes he/she is successful in inspiring you to write something poignant, grand and at other times, your fail to grasp his/her inspiration! I hope that mine is as persistent as yours! Well done, Donna! Beck
This Poem was Critiqued By: Erzahl Leo M. Espino On Date: 2003-10-15 00:22:40
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.87500
Hi Donna, One can’t deny the personal touch of your words here Donna! And the way you present it with your flowing words and ideas is very effective to this reader. You write with your heart and soul! “My Muse” --- The pondering character of your poem radiates in your title here. I like the simplicity of it…yet it adds the personal touch and emotional impact of your poetry. “My muse inspires me when I do not have a pen and paper. My muse inspires me when I am driving and cannot write. My muse inspires me when I am too tired to write. I wish my muse was more accommo(n)dating.” --- Starting your stanzas with “My muse” again adds special meaning to your subject…such intimacy with the subject is evident. I like the little humor surrounding this stanza…on how playful and so-inspiring your muse is. I like the “wrong timing” scenario of your muse. Great introductory! You captured this reader’s attention! “Sometimes my muse gives me ideas, but I can only form them in a mediocre way on paper. They are formed nicely in my head. I think no one can see the gen(e)sis there.” --- Wonderful! You write with your mind, with whole sincerity and honesty. I like how you allow your questioning mind wonder then wander around your head. As if your brain can’t contain the overwhelming fascination of your surrounding and of life in general. Your words and thoughts are truly inspiring! “My muse is a woman, but sometimes a man--young, old and in between. A deep thinker, morose at sometimes, happy at best.” --- Continuously, you bring depth on your muse’s character. Here, you explained how friendly and the “not-so-complicated” nature of your muse…on how versatile and open in general views. I like “happy at best” most! “My muse is not wealthy, which is ironic for I have never known wealth. My muse just now told me he might inspire me to write about a wealthy gentleman. I don't know how, since he has never known wealth. Sometimes he thinks he is so clever. But that always remains to be seen.” --- I like your humble words here…on how you value on personality and not on wealth. I like the mystery that encircles here… “My muse isn't a certain color, unless the color various will do. He isn't fat nor thin. He or she loves to bite into a meaty poem though.” --- Continuously you widen and broaden the scope of your muse, from a multi-faceted to a “hearty” eater of poetry…this is truly entertaining! I like the use of the word “though” in the last part of the stanza for it complements the earlier line “He isn’t fat nor thin”. Great flow and structure! “My muse laughs at me at times for not writing when I should. And cries for me at other times when I do. She also wishes I had better penmanship since I write in longhand before I type.” --- I like how your muse becomes your constant companion…through the laughter and through the tears. I also like how you address your muse as someone “he” and sometimes as “she”. It only shows how universal and none-gender your mysterious muse is. For me, the little humor for your penmanship is an effective way on letting readers not get bored. I like the simple spices you add to your poetry…very effective in catching attentions. :) “My muse wishes I would venture out on a limb once in a while. But I was pushed off a diving board when I was nine and fought with all my might to break the surface,and once I made it to the edge of the pool the instructor couldn't see my tears because my face was wet.” --- The adventures of your muse are continuously entertaining! To associate your muse to your childhood experience is quite a humble revelation. I like the ironic scenario of that moment where the instructor couldn’t see the tears of your face because of its obvious wetness. :) “But unlike me who never returned to the diving board my muse keeps coming back for more.” --- And to bring back that “not-so-good” childhood experience to your annoying muse is quite an intelligent technique. For me, this is my favorite part and I think the most powerful part of your work. You just know how to end and summarize your poetry in flawless lines. I find your work skillfully done! I didn’t expect this to end like this. I like the element of surprise at the last part of your work! It ends up in a profound and thought-provoking piece! Superb! Kudos on your fine work here Donna! The simplicity and wholehearted nature of your poetry brings a lot of impact to this reader! I’m glad you posted this piece for our enjoyment! We are surely entertained by your “muse”. For me, this is a winner! As always, Erzahl :)
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2003-10-14 22:29:38
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.84615
Poet your muse has a great sense of humor and loves to tease you with it according to the read....nice structure, great word flow, images jump up and take hold as the reader follows down each stanza......been there, done that, one night driving home in the dark it seems my must lit up the dark night sky and gave me a vision which caused me to pull over to the side of the road....no matter how hard I looked for paper and pen it was not to be found......tears actually fell from my eyes......the words were so beautiful and heartwarming.....Please God let me remember them I am almost home....I said thos over and over again...........in time the image and the words vanished and I was home.....but I did not write one word.....the next morning though the most beautiful poem sat on my kitchen table and it was one of those nights when I was forced to rise from the bed....you know those nights as well my dear friend......and from that writing came....No Greater Love Then He Who Is........it was an Easter poem and He really wanted it written I guess ....... Your words bring forth smiles, good thoughts, perhaps a time of rejoicing in the written word as well as the thoughts per the MUSE that you have come to know and love....and yes, it could be a man, woman, child, old, young, even a puppy dog, cat, bird, mother nature, water flowing down streem or upstreem if allowed to travel that way or a bees nest as it hangs in your tree outside the glider window.......and to think we do not venture off on a limb....well, that would be horrible to shake that branch as long as the nest is filled......hehehe..... Thanks for posting and sharing this with us....enjoyed is very very much and plan on sharing it with a few friends. Be safe and God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2003-10-14 20:45:05
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.75000
Hi Donna, This poem is so clever and all the way through I was thinking... I do that or that happens to me. I never gave my muse a gender or a name but now I think I should give it more credence and listen to it closer. When I have a thought that I think is 'brilliant' I am never near pen and paper (I write poems out as you do before typing) and I say I will remember that...but mostly I do not. I do believe some of my best phrases are still somewhere in my addled brain straining to get out. I love the line..."I wish my muse were more accommondating" This entire piece is written with a great deal of humor and is so much fun to read...."my muse whishes I would venture out on a limb"...I know this feeling...I read other poems and wish I dared to write like that or even be able to would be a nice start. Great poem...loved it Blessings...Marilyn
This Poem was Critiqued By: Irene E Fraley On Date: 2003-10-13 10:48:04
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.62500
I like this ! The muse is the all of potentiality, never tied down to a time-table, form, color or gender. This honorarium to the imagination is something I can really identify with. Why is it that the best ideas seem to come charging up to us in the shower? As I was reading this poem I found myself wondering if it was a transposed prose poem. It would certainly make a good one! The wonder of the imagination is that it is without limit, and keeps us filled with hope when life is downing us. This is a good musing on the muse. Thanks for sharing, Rene Fraley
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