This Poem was Submitted By: Paul R Lindenmeyer On Date: 2003-11-30 13:31:10 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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This Last Christmas

Endings are easier, when planned.  Traditions exist in memories, not time.    This last Christmas will reside there      side by side with others past. When the babe was in your arms   and you were the mother at the crib.     When the new house and fresh tree       warmed your heart and nourished your spirit. This last Christmas will be held by lawyers,   and attended to by a courtroom documents.     The house will be empty, no baby or cheer,       only memories wrapped in time beneath an absent tree.            

Copyright © November 2003 Paul R Lindenmeyer


This Poem was Critiqued By: April Rose Ochinang Claessens On Date: 2003-12-05 23:12:55
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.40000
paul, i have felt the melacholy of your work by the images that you used like ENDINGS ARE EASIER WHEN PLANNED. TRADITIONS EXIST IN MEMORIES, not time. This LAST CHRISTMAS will RESISE THERE side by side with others past. When the babe WAS in your arms and you were the mother at the crib. When the new house and fresh tree warmed your heart and nourished your spirit. This last Christmas WILL BE HELD BY LAWYERS, and ATTENDED TO BY (A) COURTROOM DOCUMENTS. The house will be EMPTY, NO BABY OR CHEER, only MEMORIES WRAPPED in time BENEATH AN ABSENT TREE. i felt the sadness while reading it.this is a good poem. however, i just want to call your attention on a very slight detail which you might have overlooked. in the line "...and attended to by A courtroom documents..."arent you suppose to delete "A?" to make it"and attended to by courtroom documents (?)" still paul, i respect your poem. thanks for posting it. april


This Poem was Critiqued By: Sandra J Kelley On Date: 2003-12-05 17:44:15
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.02941
Paul, this poem speaks of so much loss, all of this, christmas,the woman you are speaking to the baby, have all been consigned to memory as if they are gone the last stanza points to divorce rather than death but the poem has left us feeling the loss just as keenly as if they are dead. This is truly a great poem. Sandra
This Poem was Critiqued By: Elaine Marie Phalen On Date: 2003-12-01 09:47:23
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.92308
Oh, Paul, what an incredibly poignant reflection on the aftermath of divorce! The ironic first line implies that, since this has been a legally constructed "event", it's somehow easier to manage. Yet we know this isn't the case, and the speaker's sadness shows through in the penultimate line as he refers to the empty, cheerless house. I think his heart has been torn in half. "Traditions exist in memories, not time." True, yes. Sadly, there is no warmth in memory when everything that created this reminiscence has gone. No baby, no tree, no cheer. When the babe was in your arms and you were the mother at the crib. When the new house and fresh tree warmed your heart and nourished your spirit. I find this eerily suggestive of the Virgin Mary and her Christ Child. I realize that the speaker is addressing his soon-to-be-ex-wife, but woven beneath this current situation is the echo of a much older scene. The crib, the tree, the promise of hope in the future, seem almost archetypal. This may not be intentional but it's no less evocative. This last Christmas will be held by lawyers, and attended to by [a] courtroom documents. The clinical finale to this marriage is sealed by people who haven't shared in any of it, except its ending. Then the speaker returns to his vacant home and numbed heart. I hope this isn't a personal piece but it certainly sounds authentic. If so, here's a cyber-hug across the miles. Hang in there. Joy doesn't vanish forever; it just waits for the right time to reappear. My Best, Brenda
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2003-11-30 18:17:34
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.56364
In the last stanza try taking out 'a' for an easier read......just a suggestion for you have more then one court document mentioned...... This piece is heart breaking especially during this holiday season.....my own daughter filed the daybefore Thanksgiving, her husband was served the day after and he is devastated that she did such a thing though he moved out, got himself another apartment and is living with a woman thirteen years his junior with a small child.......If this is personal poet I am so very sorry for the pain you are feeling and the loss is so evident within the lines......your words will touch the hearts and souls of many, some in this same situation, others perhaps contemplating.......the pain, the emptiness, the loss, is it necessary if talking could make it all right? Your words brought forth images of the young couple in love, the first home, the first Christmas shared with their first child........so many memories within....thanks for posting, I shall hold you in my prayers be safe and God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: Jennifer j Hill On Date: 2003-11-30 17:30:05
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.62069
Dear Paul, This is a hard time of year for any kind of mourner. The profound sense of aloneness expressed here is sadly felt by this reader. Endings are hard in the best of times, but when divorce occurs in a family with children, it makes it doubly hard to weather the holidays. Usually families fall on tradition during holiday times, and divorce doesn't allow for that luxury. Time to make some new traditions. It's easy to get bogged down with the memories of Christmas past than deal with the bleak present. This structure is very pleasing to the eye which contrasts to the unpleasant feelings the narrator is expressing. The reader notes immediately that the title is "This Last Christmas" and that you mention this twice in the poem also. I assume this means this is the last Christmas you will be married in name anyway, but are already physically apart. In stanza three line 2 it reads "and attended to by a courtroom documents." I think the "a" needs deleted and it will read better. "only memories wrapped in time beneath an absent tree."----This is so poeticly and profoundly true. Nicely done , poet. With this poem you touch the readers heart and you express your feelings well here. Keep writing, I can attest it helps alot. My Best, Jennifer
This Poem was Critiqued By: Sherri L Smith On Date: 2003-11-30 15:56:25
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.81818
Dear Paul, Christmas time is so hard for those that have lost someone in the previous year. It doesn't matter if it was through death or divorce, it is still hard. I remember my first Christmas after my divorce, it was very hard. I can understand the sentiment that went into writing this poem. Writing to me is very good therapy. Sherri
This Poem was Critiqued By: arnie s WACHMAN On Date: 2003-11-30 13:58:11
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.25000
This is a sad gut wrenching theme. I "assume" that a divorce or death has taken place. You might have mentioned photographs that held those sweet memories for all time. and attended to by a courtroom documents I would take out "a". Thanks so much for posting. Good Title along with well formed stanzas.
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