This Poem was Submitted By: Mell W. Morris On Date: 2004-01-21 19:51:32 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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I Must Go Down To The Sea Again

Thalassa, the sea! Love, come be with me by the high tides and see an aggregate of clouds that shrouds then scurries to the south. The blessings of the sea beckon through its rustling reeds. Water sanctifies and stirs like the touch of a sword to a shoulder which be-sirs. Your  presence here is the clear essence I need.  By the sea beside me, your reach and scope royally fulfill me.  The hope in your face, the grace in every inflection infect me with passion and affection. Come, stay at my side and if you deeply care, share with me the neap of the tide. My love, be for me like the sea.
Copyright © January 2004 Mell W. Morris

This Poem was Critiqued By: Leo Wilder On Date: 2004-02-07 16:22:13
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.81818
Mell I must go too. Sorry I'm not saying more, but I want to take that same trip. Leo

This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2004-02-06 14:28:27
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.59302
What a lovely powerful title poet.........I must go down to the sea again..........for those of us who know and love the sea it is empowering to one's soul.......filling it with the nutrients of what is necessary to continue with daily life as it is away from the wonders of the sea.........to sit and watch the waves roll in, to feel the water above your feet as the sand receeds back into the entire body before you.........to know the Lord created this beauty to share with you and I and to be a part of this creation of His love.......how can one resist the love you feel when you are there and it is beside you...... Water sanctifies and stirs like the touch of a sword to a shoulder which be-sirs. Your presence here is the clear essence I need. By the sea beside me, your reach and scope royally fulfill me. The above stanza says it all.....and thus a bravo to you my friend and my best to this months poems as well....you have created many wonders this month and deserve them all. Thanks for posting and sharing this with us....be safe in your travels and God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: Jennifer j Hill On Date: 2004-02-02 15:05:23
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.86957
Finally, Mell. Only you could do this title justice. I've had such bad computer problems. The body count (computer bodies, that is) is at 2. First my pc bit the dust, then I killed my dear husband's laptop. What's a girl to do? Now I'm on his pc. Lets hope my luck doesn't continue! You're talkin my language here. Ahhh....the sea...love it...love love I saw this title and wild horses could not drag me away from this read. Thank you thank you thank you. and my soul thanks you too. Your beginning plea and invitation, employing the simple rhyme of sea/be/me draws the reader into this visual and sensual piece. The word aggregate is an alliteration all by itself. :) And I love your use of it here. Especially since it enables you to use the rhyme of clouds/shrouds so perfectly. Pinch me someone, I need to make sure I didn't just die and go to heaven. The "S" of shroud/scurries/south/sea all whispering through the rustling/reeds beackon this reader to lay back and listen to the message of the sea. I close my eyes and I can hear it, calling me.(only because of your desciption) And I can see the clouds collecting together as one and scurrying off, as is the way of the seaward weather. The soft rhyme of blessings and rustling add a nice touch. Ah yes, water sanctifies.(like the touch of the Holy Spirit on your soul) "Water sanctifies and stirs like the touch of a sword to a shoulder which be-sirs" This is brillant how you compare the sanctifying and stirring of the water to the be-srring touch of a sword! Your "S"es just keep whispering along. One would almost think you are talking about the Lord in this stnaza where you say "Your presence here is the clear essence I need. By the sea beside me, your reach and scope royally fulfill me. " After all He is our bridegroom. :) Stirs/be-sirs is a fresh rhyme, as is presense/essence, which works cohesively to bridge us to the next thought. Then: "The hope in your face, the grace in every inflection infect me with passion and affection. Come, stay at my side and if you deeply care, share with me the neap of the tide." This stanza is awe-inspiring for this reader. First, just the rhyme is so great with face/grace, inflection/infect, passion/affection, care/share, side/tide. But it's not just the rhyme here, it's also the music you've managed to just kind of whisper through this, all of the sudden becomes crystal clear like the carribean waters. Your ending of "My love, be for me like the sea." is a plea that matches the opening line in intensity. Reading this poem is not like reading. It's more like experiencing. Thanks and God love ya, Jennifer
This Poem was Critiqued By: Sherri L Smith On Date: 2004-02-02 14:13:52
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.43333
Dear Mell, You have captured the essence of the sea and why I am so drawn to it. I have lived in the midwest all my live and still do, but I am drawn to the sea when ever I go to either coast. It makes me so peaceful and so serene. The alliteration, the s sounds that you used, just adds to the flow and the serenity of the piece. Internal rhyming is also nice as well. Care/share inflection/affection. I think the soft s alliteration in the first stanza just sets the tone for the whole work. Thanks for giving me a little serenity in a busy hectic day. Love, Sherri
This Poem was Critiqued By: Jordan Brendez Bandojo On Date: 2004-01-28 09:20:28
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.93103
Dear Mell, I like the personification of love here as it scurries to the place where he can emerge his totality. The dynamic action of Thalassa is wonderful to visualize. By the way, I am wondering if you are referring Thalasa as the satellite of Neptune that is second in distance from the planet! It is interesting in this context! I Must Go Down To The Sea Again is the longing of the speaker to feel the comfort and satisfaction of love. The satisfaction of love is manifested in the blessings of the sea. Wonderful! It there where absolute refreshment is found. "Water sanctifies and stirs like the touch of a sword to a shoulder which be-sirs." --- I like the sibilance here. I can feel the blessing of the sea as it coolly senerades me to maximum real sensation. "Your presence here is the clear essence I need. By the sea beside me, your reach and scope royally fulfill me." How lovely and totally inspiring! The simplicity of the words enhances sincerety. This is the simpliest piece I ever read from you but the essence of it is more than a treasure to keep! Bravo! Jordan
This Poem was Critiqued By: Turner Lee Williams On Date: 2004-01-25 05:00:48
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.60000
Mell--There's a lot of love for the water "running" through this piece. Solid combinations of allits (an aggregate; rustling reeds; shrouds then scurries to the south; inflection infect) and internal rhymes(sea/be/me/see; clouds/shrouds; stirs/be-sirs; presence/essence; here/clear; sea/me/me; scope/hope; face/grace; inflection/affection; side/tide; care/share; be/me/sea) produces melodious rhythmic tones throughout the entire poem. The metaphoric descriptors(the blessings of the sea beckon...and water sanctifies and stirs like the touch of a sword to a shoulder which be-sirs) are triple treats: my favorite lines; consonant of "s" sounds; and great simile for knighthood. Not only does this verbiage provides excellent picturesque imagery, but pays homage to a natural wonder of the world. This piece appealed to the hopeless romantic in me and as such, I see the speaker wishing to have a reciprocation of the sea connection with a love interest. A superb read which I throughly enjoyed. I hope like crazy that I didn't understate your great effort. TLW
This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas Edward Wright On Date: 2004-01-22 12:14:51
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.61111
Mell, Some great imagery here, but the poem is ponderously overweighted IMHO (H = Hubris-ridden-hopelessly-romantic-idyllically-oriented-saffronite) and i have put it through the DE-Caf-Cal-ibrator and with little effort and much sincerity offer this distillation for your immediate and hopefully honest approbation. (Whatever that means). :) O Thalassa - come with me by the high tide o'er the aggregates of clouds that shroud then scurry south. blessings beckon through your rustling reeds and water sanctifies, stirs the sea within me, your reach and scope fulfill - the hope in your face - that inflected grace - infect with passion and with affection stay at my side and if you deeply care, share the neap tide, the long-waved glide - and be my love, my sea.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Joanne Duval Morgan On Date: 2004-01-21 23:35:53
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.83333
Grand linguistics as usual, you never disappoin, never really do. I'm stuck with all engulfing embrace of this poem, the sea mystifies, is unique to itself, in it's poer, but also in the gracefulness your words display here. I'm really having a difficult time, but I hope I've been able to convey, that the embracement is all consuming, as is this poem. Mell you get deep with each submission, and I fight with myself to understand each nuance you protray, this is merte sensation with the sea the canvas, and it's wonderful. The brain is not in sink with the rotations of the earth right now, I read all the poetry, trying to understand all the metaphors, and words placement, the projection the poet is trying to imbue the reader with, this poem is pure sensation, as such I wish I could once again experience the embrace you relate here. Sorry I could do better by you, but it's quite a struggle for me right now. Hope I've at least been able to tell you in my way, I understand the backdop, the analogy, and the lovliness of sensation. Sorry Friendgirl best I can do right now....Love, take care, wish I were coming to Texas for the Super Bowl, quite unable to of course, but you'll be constantly in my thoughts, wishing I could meet you personally....Love Jo
This Poem was Critiqued By: Joanne M Uppendahl On Date: 2004-01-21 22:43:40
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dear Mell: You've given me a heady moment of discovery with your title; it thrillingly evokes John Masefield's masterful work, "Sea Fever." It was one of the very first poems I ever loved. To find your sublime poem tonight is a profound discovery for extensive reasons. Among them: A "Mell Morris" for my collection. But along with the beauty of this work, a penetrating sadness. Thalassa, the sea! Love, come be with me by the high tides and see an aggregate of clouds that shrouds then scurries to the south. The blessings of the sea beckon through its rustling reeds. The Greek name for the sea is grand onomatopoeia. The assonance in "clouds/shrouds" and the accompanying imageries bring a kind of blissful state for me, although I feel the sense of foreshadowing. The word "thalassa" suggests "thanatopsis" to me, though there is little similarity. The nearness of "shrouds" and the thoughts of "blessings of the sea" which "beckon" (a symphony of plosive 'b' sounds) seems like the call of a tragic Greek chorus. Liquid r's in "rustling reeds" will send euphonious, engulfing shivers to readers who are awake, though deeply lulled by the soft, almost hypnotic rhythms here. We wonder *who* is the "Love" to whom the speaker addresses these exquisite lines may be. A sense of resignation, perhaps surrender, is a susurration in this profound work. I am reminded of mortality more strongly with each line: Water sanctifies and stirs like the touch of a sword to a shoulder which (be-stirs). Your presence here is the clear essence I need. By the sea beside me, your reach and scope royally fulfill me. The expansiveness of the word "royally" seems like a gift to listeners, or to the one to whom these words are spoken. The soft sibilance of "sanctifies/sword/sea" and many other words again suggests the movement of water. But an unease overtakes me as I read, thinking of the image of "sword to a shoulder." The sword is also the means of 'slaying the ego' and cutting through the illusion of life. In folklore, the monster or dragon is often slain with the sword. I cannot help but think that someone is saying farewell in this work - perhaps to a loved one, perhaps to life itself. The melancholy work has cast a spell on me, and I'm unable to stop rereading. The hope in your face, the grace in every inflection infect me with passion and affection. Come, stay at my side and if you deeply care, share with me the neap of the tide. It is Love to stand by and share life's low points as well as high ones. Ones who stay beside us during these times are loving and beloved. The words "inflection/infect/affection" are insistently yet softly percussive. The slight suggestion of an illness is there, with "infect" - at least for this reader. My love, be for me like the sea. I sought some biographical information on Masefield as I pondered your work. He died five days before my daughter was born. He was an orphan who went to sea at thirteen. He wrote "Sea Fever" at the age my son was when he died. The last line of his poem portends much: "And quiet sleep and a sweet dream when the long trick's over." This poem seems to be of the ebb and flow of life, as well as the ebb and flow of emotions. There are times of abundance and times of withdrawal; this work seems to speak of that time of decreasing. To me the sea has always represented the vast 'ocean' of life. The work invites us as readers to delve deeply with the speaker into the intuitive realms, into the ancient primordial wisdom. Perhaps that is the ultimate identity of "Thalassa." As if the speaker were a dear friend, a beloved family member, I can't help but respond with ever fiber of my being. More words are difficult now. You have reached great heights and depths with this piece. It is beyond my skills to give you my complete reaction to this work. It becomes personal and I no longer have objectivity to help me sort out my own responses. This does what great poetry can do - it moves the reader to wordlessness, but quickened pulse and wondering. Brava! A basket woven by Mary Kiona, filled with the sea's most fragile, loveliest shells extended. All my best, always Joanne
This Poem was Critiqued By: Irene E Fraley On Date: 2004-01-21 21:15:12
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.66667
How lovely this is! The first thing that struck me was the really mature use of language. The imagery is clear, vivid and the poem reads well aloud. The emotonal honesty of the poem is beautiful and as a love poem, this is striking. I like the restraint in the poem, and the way that imagery is used to create the emotional tone. I particularly like the clever image of the sword which "be-sirs" at a touch. Great use of language! Thanks for sharing this with us, Rene
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