This Poem was Submitted By: Mick Fraser On Date: 2004-01-26 10:50:07 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!
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Copyright © January 2004 Mick Fraser
Everyone knows for sure?
Armaments are pervasive?
Peoples lives at risk?
Osama is collaborating?
No other options?
Send the world a message?
Offend others intelligence?
Fuck you UN?
Mr. Powell's arm twisted?
And Cheney pulling strings?
Saddam an immediate threat?
Shock and Awe necessary?
Domination not the intention?
Ethics were considered?
Simple solutions for complex problems?
The right thing to do?
Rebuilding will cure all?
Unilateral action is correct?
Coalition countries will profit?
The world will be safer?
Intelligence was accurate?
Oh? There aren't any weapons?
NO DOUBT BUSH HAS COMMITTED WAR CRIMES!!!
I don't mean to insult anyone (except Mr. Bush) by this piece. I love the US, but not Mr. Bush obviously.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Erzahl Leo M. Espino On Date: 2004-02-01 01:05:06
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.61538
Wow, this is full of content and profundity. Such delicate issues in an intelligent presentation. I find this a clever piece!
Putting all lines with a question mark is one another clever move. It allows the line to end at its line. Author can place every topic and points at any order, no need to arrange. Each line can carry its purpose and argument. Plus, it could be answerable by either “yes” or “no”. It can be “true” or “false”. It could be offending and not. Quite safe… :)
Ending it with exclamatory points (yes, its more than one, and letters are all in capital letters) is yes, an obvious declaration of your stand: “I love the US, but not Mr. Bush obviously”.
--- Starting this with your WMD (Weapons of Mass Destruction) is a clever prelude to your series of questions. Actually, this represents what the world thinks. Up to this day, the discovery and news about WMD remains a mystery.
“Osama is collaborating?
No other options?
Send the world a message?”
--- These are such strong lines and opinions.
You have captured everything in this acrostic. From the roles of Osama, UN, Powell, Cheeney, Saddam, coalition countries, to Bush, you addressed it all properly. Great attempt and well crafted.
From issues, “Saddam an immediate treat”, “ethics”, “right thing to do”, “rebuilding will cure all” - what an excuse, “world will be safer” to “war crimes” - your work is such a relevant contemplation of our times. Well-done!
Thank you for another threat! You have expressed yourself and your true emotions in a very artistic way. Excellent! I enjoy the read! For me, this is a winner!
This Poem was Critiqued By: Sherri L Smith On Date: 2004-01-27 06:56:18
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.38095
You did a good job with this acrostic, although I don't share your views. I love my country and support my troops, I have four kids involved in the military. The fact that I disagree with your words, does not stop me from appreciating the style and the thought that you put into this poem.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Debbie L Fischer On Date: 2004-01-26 20:09:50
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.87500
You have succeeded not only in an acrostic poem well done but raised issues for sure as to the decisions
Bush has made and the effect it has not only on the US but on all people. Some may find the need to defend
him and some may believe he did what needed to be done. However, I know I am not the only one who will
understand and have questioned the very candid and honest words of your poem. Well done. I have no suggestions as this is superb.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Regis L Chapman On Date: 2004-01-26 16:38:17
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.19643
Freedom is not free. What bothers me about this whole thing, is the cost. The cost.
What a cost.
This United States is not it's leaders. It's it's people. We remain united, largely because we are under a vast umbrella, and are untouched by the events such a behemoth can render. As such, we bear reponsibility in part for that. "you hidden desire makes your gifts unwholesome"- Kahlil Gibran
I love the U.S. and the benefits of living here, but wish the cost for others was not so large. We seem to impose this cost upon others, and not upon ourselves. I don't agree with the way this is done, as apparently so does the writer.
Duplicity is part of the political game. I remain uneasy even in crowds. As for the poem, your work continues to remind me of things I would rather forget- and for that I have to thank you. Great job.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2004-01-26 16:14:39
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.54902
Weapons of Mass Destruction in this forms says it all and more......well Mick you have a definite mission in mind as your words bring forth many emotions and yes, one of not liking the President of our country but that is understandable and there are many that agree with you......nice form , true to style, each word follows as it should and no you are not causing harm to others as your emotions play forth in rightful manner.
Thanks for posting and sharing, it is not an easy piece to speak of nor against for it does ring of truth and God help us if this man is re-elected to the house again...........
Be safe, God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: Ronda Michelle Nelson On Date: 2004-01-26 11:32:10
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.35714
Well, I disagree with the message. I think Sudam Hussien committed the war crimes?? It just baffles
me how the murder and treatment of his own people are overlooked, and, how public opionion in Iraq
is one of which most are very thankful we got that goon out of office, and they are praying we don't
leave until the job is finished, and they can safely establish a democracy.
Anyhow, obviously your poem stirred emotion, so, speaking from an poetic sense, it worked! which is what
poetry is about. I like how it is all put in question form, for, I am pro Bush, but some of your
questions raised does make me think. This is the kind of poetry that reaches out and slaps ya, which
I like that! Good Job
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