This Poem was Submitted By: Robert L Tremblay On Date: 2004-02-18 05:12:24 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
Click Here To add this poem to your "Voting Possibilities" list!
The Matrix F o r m e d L o n g A g o
O n E o n E m b e d d e d,
R e s t i n g I n s i d e
M o t e G a r n i s h e d.
E n i g m a! I(O)B o o z e
D e n,A.A! A n a b a t i c
L.M. g r i n, W h a t I b e?
O b i N o a h’s K o r a n,
N.E. n i b B a k e M i n t.
G@D’ s S o A t o m i c D r.
A.D. I h o t; I R i c k M e.
G.E. D.e z. I b a n d M o m.
O d e,D e c e n t R E M S? |
|
Copyright © February 2004 Robert L Tremblay
Additional Notes:
As you ponder this poem, please realize the "probabilities"
involved, which for a
X
matrix where the unknown in each position has
26 possibilities (26 letters of the alphabet), the possible combinations
are 26 to the
th power. Combine this with the "probability" of dechipering
an actual message, and you have literally an infinite chance of accomplishing
what I seem to have achieved. Because of the crypitic nature of the "message",
a product of the constraints of the form, I supply an interpretation for
assistance.
Formed Long Ago
On Eon Embedded,
Resting Inside
Mote Garnished.
This line refers to the Matrix, which I view as the Divine Plan,
having been formed long ago on an embedded eon (the Void), garnished with
a "small particle" (Creation).
This process of "Creation" is an enigma as well as the personal enigma
following the word "enigma" where I speak about my drinking over the
years, attending A.A. meetings (den), and, yet, in spite of this
or maybe because of this, I have been able to achieve a high level
of creativity and thought processing.
"Anabatic L.M. grin, what I be" asks the question of who be this
man who has a upwardling moving "lunar modular" (man in the moon)
grin?
"Obi Noah's Koran, N.E. nib baked mint." refers to my (N.E. = New England)attempts,
some would say "voodoo" (Obi=African religion involving voodism),
to combine the God of Israel (Noah) with the God of Islam (Koran)through
my writings (nib)so finely "baked".
"God's so atomic Dr.!" refers to my awe of God, the Creator as well as
"Doctor" of the universe.
"A.D., I hot; I rick me." refers to the passion (I hot) that I feel
living "in the year of the Lord" even thought this passion has caused
be to "sprain" myself a couple of times through my life.
"G.E.D. ez. I band Mom." refers to my dear mother who passed away
a little over a year ago and who I miss dearly. She was obtained
her G.E.D. in midlife and I continue to honor her to this day (band).
"Ode, decent REMS?" asks a final question of the reader....after
reading and understanding this "ode", does it give you a decent
night's sleep (REMs = Rapid Eye Movements)
I do hope readers can excuse me for having to supply an explanation,
but the form is so abstract that I felt it neccessary to do so.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Wayne R. Leach On Date: 2004-02-22 17:37:47
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.80000
I think this word game/puzzle belongs in a puzzle book. It hardly rewards the reader as much as it must have the "poet" when he accomplished this miraculous play on words, which must be almost mathematically impossible. Without the footnotes, I'd have no clue. Sorry!
This Poem was Critiqued By: Leo Wilder On Date: 2004-02-21 14:01:57
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Robert,
You explain much too much.
Leo
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2004-02-20 16:18:43
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.55556
Hi Poet; and indeed by every creation you present forth to us here on the Link you are a creator ..........I do not ever recall reading a form such as this and I am grateful for the explanations you did present at the end.......I did get the read down though which is good for me.......I am sorry about your mom though if she felt the love you preset even after a year has passed I am sure she knew she was blessed with a fine son.....It does not matter what your write, the form you present it in your love and passion for God always remains strong and true.......thank you for sharing with us.....be safe my friend, looking forward to your next poem......God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: Jordan Brendez Bandojo On Date: 2004-02-19 22:11:25
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.85714
Hi Bob,
How I am puzzled to this writing. Matrix and Probability? What Mathematics!
For this, I got interested. My course is Physics and Mathematics interests me
a lot as it is the language of Physics. But sad to say, I have a little hate on
Probality because my grade was low. But solving equation using the matrix technique
is quite a love for me. It's easy! Hehe! Just a story about my academic life in college!
Thank you so much for your additional notes. Now, the spiritual connotation of this
poem is clear and apreciated greatly. Tackling the Divine Plan is a big thing and
it takes a mind to have it disclosed.
Uniquely interesting share with your den, nib, REM, etc.
Thank you very much for sharing, Bob.
As always you are a unique poet!
Best wishes for more writings,
Jordan
This Poem was Critiqued By: Regis L Chapman On Date: 2004-02-18 11:25:08
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.50000
This is such a refreshing and inventive form, and I am not sure I can effectively critique something so clearly creative and groundbreaking (in my mind anyway, maybe I have missed something, though). I am so glad to see that people can really think out of the box...I mean in a box...anyway, it's still super cool, as any reference to math and this type of geometric thinking in writing is quite amazing. I find myself a bit taken aback by it, in fact. I was a bit shocked as I got part way through this review, and found that I can read this poem twice in different directions! Sheesh! I have to say that I am mightily humbled by the effort this clearly must have taken. <shaking head>
Often I feel that I am writing something powerful and worthy, but I don't think my work contains half the effort this one must have. Either you are a super genius, or a mathematician or both. So to conclude my ridiculously starstruck comments- it's amazing!
Your explanation was very helpful also, thanks.
Aside from the inventiveness of the form, and my amazement at the 3d thinking this must have required, the poem itself says things beyond that. I would like to talk about that now.
Formed Long Ago
On Eon Embedded,
Resting Inside
Mote Garnished.
The above stanza for me also stands out as being a very refreshing way of phrasing age and conveying a waiting state. The term "mote garnished" also evokes a regal or honorable stance of the part of the waiting subject we have not yet met.
I will only say that without the explanation, I don't think this poem would stand on it's own. This is both good and bad. Clearly the restrictions of the form chosen impose their own necessities and so I can't really say that this is a negative.
Much of poetry is at least in part a small inside joke, so unless you have been living under a rock, it's easy to realize this.
What is nice is that there in fact is so much thought and extrapolation of ideas for a very few words. I like this, and those who read my work will also know that I am a huge fan of putting this into my own work.
I often wish that people would read my work in the same analytic way that your new (to me) form seems to invite one to do. Look for references in all directions, not just left to right, up to down, line by line.
I guess why I am so taken with this form is that it's reminded me of something I might not do when critiquing "regular" poetry, but I put so much effort into doing in my work. I don't really look hard enough for the internal forms and references. Sometimes that is hard to "get" when it's not a work you have written, however, I am sure it exists more than I might think. I try to obfuscate the meanings with only hints of what I am talking about.
So to summarize, it's a stupendous work for me, representing not only the concepts you intended, but also for a poetry without traditional boundaries. It says to me many things about my own work, and that of others who like to distill their concepts down to the minimal aspects, to be examined under a microscope. In a way, the rigid form of this work rather represents something like a cell in the body. I once saw a map of the relationships between various aspects of a cell in a block diagram. It was a poster six feet across in tiny type with a zillion boxes with arrows pointing from everywhere to everywhere. This is rather like that to me. It's a change of perspective and a shock to look at work so densely packed with information and relationships.
One of the finest works I have ever read, if that was not already clear to you from my critique.
Thanks,
REEG!
Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link
Click HERE to
return to ThePoeticLink.com Database Page!