This Poem was Submitted By: Edwin John Krizek On Date: 2004-05-22 23:13:46 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Enchanted Stew

I have been cooking this stew all my life with the ingredients given to me. A little jealousy, a little avarice, a little abuse, were some. A little magic, a little, joy, a little hope were some others. I have been cooking this stew all my life with all the courage I could find. I used pain, I used hate, I used insanity to season this potion. Friends added kindness, and closeness, and understanding. I have been cooking this stew all my life, slowly distilling  the toxic  from the safe, the misery from the happiness, the sick from the well. I have been cooking this stew all my life. Come dine with me tonight and taste  a meal filled with love. 

Copyright © May 2004 Edwin John Krizek

This Poem was Critiqued By: Marcia McCaslin On Date: 2004-06-06 19:11:04
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.63636
Edwin--you are so human--you have made a real fan out of me. I love the simplicity of language (which I said before) mixed the complexity of fresh originality that leads me down a path I've never been before. That, to me, is the sign of a true poet and a true honest-from-the-gut writer. (Which is what I love). I love new ideas and new ways of expressing the oldest of feelings--perhaps the most common of human feelings. This you have done--to the delight of this reader. You make me see my very flawed self in your writing--and YET--leave enough 'good stuff' to feel some honor as well. Very compelling, Edwin. Thanks. Marcia

This Poem was Critiqued By: Sandra J Kelley On Date: 2004-05-30 09:01:26
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.73077
Edwin, I like the nice mix of ingrediants not everything in life is all good or all bad but a nice mix of both that cooked together long enough can be looked back on and judged as good because it has been salted with love. If you decide to do any rewrites I would concider adding some cooking instructions, stir frequently, cover lightly, simmer slowly etc... However, that is just my take-the poem works as it is and is quite insightful. Sandra
This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas Edward Wright On Date: 2004-05-27 07:36:32
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.47500
Let me stuff it down your throat... I mean thank you for the invitation. I'm busy. Tonite. Most of the time I'm busy. I'll bring a salad. And whine. tom
This Poem was Critiqued By: Wayne R. Leach On Date: 2004-05-25 22:23:18
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.35000
Edwin, quite a perspective on life - put in a blender and whipped all together. Interesting brew you've concocted here with its brief lines and many fine images. All the ingredients to keep a reader busy savoring this piece. Nice job. Write on. wrl
This Poem was Critiqued By: Jordan Brendez Bandojo On Date: 2004-05-25 02:15:35
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.92857
Hi Edwin, This one is my second critique to your poetry and I admire the freshness of your ideas here. First of all the theme is important and it as a universal application. This applies to every being, it's a way reflecting as we continue journying our lives. I, too, has been cooking the kinds of stew you presented all my life. The first set of ingredients "little jealousy, a little avarice, a little abuse"--- these are man's respond which we can say selfish and devastating to his fellow. And I admit that I have committed one of these consciously or unconsciously. But recognizing oneself is one way to stew these ingredients into something fruitful and advantageous to the fellowmen. When you admit these, you will learn to change them. That's the way of cooking them into a savory meal. Wow! You really have a significant theme, poet! The next set of ingredients you mentioned "A little magic, a little, joy, ---[I think the first comma in this line is unwanted] a little hope" These are surprises to life which creates happiness. With all the courage...yes, it is through courage that we are saved from disgrace. Courage is a great armor while we are cooking in life. I do agree to use "pain, hate, insanity" one way or another to season the potion of life. And along our stuggle, good thing that we are blessed with friends who give us kindness and understanding, reducing the heavy emotion we feel. And then we began to filter the toxin in our lives. I like the use of "distilling" as it is apt to clean impurities. The closing line is participating to the readers, the use of imperative reinforces it. And love....prevails... Thanks for sharing this fresh idea that graces life. Jordan
This Poem was Critiqued By: Jennifer j Hill On Date: 2004-05-24 15:37:44
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Hi Ed, mmmmmmmmm, you used one of my favorite spices. The spice of life. I really like the way you've laid this out, In short lines that mimmick the way life happens. The repititions add a rhythm that makes it light and musical. I've read it over several times and find it best when read aloud. You seem to have all the ingredients there for a well-balanced meal (or life). I have only one question. In line nine am I missing something or is that coma after little unneeded? This made for an enjoyable read and I look forward to reading more of your work. Blessings, Jennifer
This Poem was Critiqued By: Gerard A Geiger On Date: 2004-05-24 11:26:38
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.50000
Dear Edwin; I like this free verse presentation of your stew of life...cooking throughout your life with all the ingredients both good and bad.. I especially like the following process edits: "Slowly distilling the toxic from the safe The misery from the happiness the sick from the well" This gives the reader the impression that the cook,through experience, can change the outcome of the final stew and make it better as the life is lived. This processed stew (distilled from life) would be one worth dining and sharing as the You,the author, appropriately states: and taste a meal filled with love. A lovely sentiment to share a full bodied meal of a life well lived with shared love for all. Thank you for sharing this thoughtful work. Gerard
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lennard J. McIntosh On Date: 2004-05-23 21:47:50
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.85714
Re: "Enchanted Stew" The writer describes a life in which the narrator reveals alternating times of love/hate, safe/toxic, misery/happiness, etc. The poem's consonance is outstanding; it comes alive when "spoken." An example is the effect of the intrernal "i" in lines 1 to 3. Check it out: read the lines aloud. The little extras make good poetry. Also, please give attention to both alliteration and assonance found in the repetition of the words, "little, used," and "from." This reader can't believe this happens by accident - this makes poetic sound! Writer: "Come dine with me tonight and taste a meal filled with love." LJMc: The narrator concludes with an invitation to a meal that shares all of the divergencies of life. Yet, seasoned with the never failing spice of "love." I'm sure that pragmatists do their part in adding to the distintions of man. However, the poor souls simply cannot serve meals like this one to which we've been invited. Good work, writer. A fellow poet, Lennard McIntosh
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