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Tippy tip money hint top tippity by what dint? toppity hip left then right hoppity intern senator's right? eternity venerates that slight flip changing sight floppity dolphins plight slip economy of oil sloppity dishonor toil clip sound, video meals cloppity clicking heels |
Additional Notes:
Critique of Causes Calamitous Currently Climbing Consiousness
and, in the end
What I Feel Is Being Done About Said Causes, Sirrah
This Poem was Critiqued By: Joanne M Uppendahl On Date: 2004-05-27 16:42:01
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.95238
Reeg:
You've named it. The current scene certainly is as "tippy" and you've
given it quite a witty but meaningful dressage here, IMHO. Read aloud, it
sounds as scrambled as Alice's thoughts in her flight down the rabbit hole.
But unlike Alice, who was "not a bit hurt", I think that you show us here
that we *are* hurt, along with others not of our species. ("dolphin's plight")
Along with the White Rabbit you seem to say:`
Oh my ears and whiskers, how late it's getting!'
With the ironic sounds of "slip sloppity" and "clip cloppity" and other
rhyme-ful accompaniment, you show us a jack-in-the-box wind-up toy that
seems in danger of flying to bits. The meter of the piece is hypnotic,
like the nightly "sound, video meals" which bombard us.
The piece's denouement is as ominous as any tremor of the earth
before a major earthquake:
"clicking heels"
Let all who have ears. . .
Well done!
Joanne