To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
Click Here To add this poem to your "Voting Possibilities" list!
Child in the distance My son is far from me Just beyond one arm’s reach In a photo frame, An impossible distance. Some day I’ll hold him close to me again But now he’s there with his one cheeky smile Fixed, and somehow fixing all his smiles Since he was poured from his mother’s tender crucible Firmly in my mind, sprung in a matrix of joy I thought I was too small to contain, Thinking I was an misanthrope, When all I needed was a child To laugh at my spreading gut. I used to hide his face ‘To concentrate,” I said and it’s true, Because now, in this distracted view, His head forces itself upon my shoulder’s memory The weary memory of my legs, my arms That lofted him into the nightly womb of his bed. And because the true distance numbers miles by five thousand Each thousand must be satisfied with one tear, Or I must hide his face again. All he wants is all I ever wanted Without, he tells me, knowing how to enjoy. And his naughty eyes have it, I see that now, That irritating plea to lighten up. He wants Not a mother’s worship nor the rod of fatherhood But a space to leave his messy crayons Spill his milk, then go on To the all other innocences of his fun. Mine was a jealous rod, sometimes, And he laughed at it to my face Crackling with the voltage of youth. Some day I’ll hold him close to me again, And until I do I’ll show him to everyone, I’ll show them all I’ll show them all My one good deed. |
This Poem was Critiqued By: Latorial D. Faison On Date: 2005-06-07 17:21:44
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.91489
Mark this is deep and sad and healing and very revealing, but most importantly, it is hopeful. Wow! I write poems about my grandfather who raised me, my father who isn't, and my real father I may never know, and it is great to read of a father wanting what most kids wait their whole lives for . . . to have a real connection.
This poem is just moving and so touching. I think it is mostly because it's about a man who may be admitting that he did something wrong where his child is concerned. The world does not always get that, and when we do get it, it's not always a complete package.
You have not severely played on words here. Overall, you rely on your feelings, and you can never go wrong with that. I love what you do with the "rod" in the poem. I like that idea of mother's looking upon children to dote on and fathers being the rearers. You know I think that's what's wrong with the world today . . . the breakdown of the family.
When families began to break down (to divorce, poverty, etc.), the roles were reversed, and not many people even know who they are any more. Women have been jilted into the workplace as mom and dad, and today men suffer that same burden while many of them struggle to raise children alone.
It is no easy task. Behind every word of your poem are probably a million more stories.
CHILD IN THE DISTANCE . . . You begin this poem in such a creative way with the picture frame and the illustion, and you carry it the distance.
You reveal a lot of lessons, a lot of feeling throughout the poem. I love how you bring it all to an end . . .
Some day I’ll hold him close to me again,
And until I do I’ll show him to everyone,
I’ll show them all
I’ll show them all
My one good deed
Even when there is no relationship, it's important to do what these last four lines suggest. I wonder if my real father even thinks of me. I'll bet your son wonders too. Great poem. Thanks for sharing it this month.
Latorial
www.latorialfaison.com