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This Poem was Submitted By: Paul R Lindenmeyer On Date: 2005-08-17 19:11:30 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Fire on Sinai

The Light chizzled stones collide with Aaron's burnished gold. In the crescendo, Immutable, Yahveh stands. Another god is vanquished and Fire returns to Sinai.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Latorial D. Faison On Date: 2005-09-03 20:00:34
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.97143
Paul, I liked this poem when I first read it. It's just taken me this long to respond. I like the title and the last line keeps the thought lingering. You definitely bring to mind in great illustration a biblical event that is memorable and talked about by pastors and readers all of the time. Again, God triumphs as another false icon/god was knocked down. Great poem. In a few words you illustrate the power of the moment, and it poetically speaks well. Latorial www.latorialfaison.com

This Poem was Critiqued By: arnie s WACHMAN On Date: 2005-09-03 11:41:14
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.40000
You sent me scrambling to my dictionary to check "Yahveh" spelt with a "v". Always saw it with a "w". Good short crisp, well done piece. I hope that fire does not return to Sinai. Thank you.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Joanne M Uppendahl On Date: 2005-08-24 21:02:27
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.78261
Paul: Here is a fine example of 'less is more' and also, how to write with 'luminosity', IMO. You effectively use sound, image, concept, formatting (especially great) and again, sound. There is so much background to this piece that I won't attempt to address in these brief remarks. Some of the harsher sounds, such as 'z' and 'v' stand like sentries holding the the two tonings of 'i'. Those sounds, both long and deep, seem to resonate this one right off the page. Amazing. Well done! Peace, Joanne

This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2005-08-23 22:43:22
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.81818
Paul, Wow, I really like this, a great read. Your structure is good, the words flow easily leading from thought to thought while your verbiage leaves colorful images dancing in the mind and the final decission is made, there can only be God. Lora

This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2005-08-21 08:33:33
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.81250
Interesting read poet.......good structure, word flow, thoughts sent forth allowing each reader to perhaps come to their own thoughts about what is being said and felt but to me in the end there is only one God and His fire still burns on Sinai...........thanks for posting, sharing and allowing this reader to stop by and respond. God Bless, Claire Love the images you projected within these lines, I can actually feel the intense heat from the fires of this burning bush.......I will always associate Sinai with the burning bush and the Lord my God.......

This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Steven Scheffer On Date: 2005-08-19 13:38:52
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Paul, I'm coming across a lot of Old Testament lushness today. Like "Aaron's burninshed gold." You speak of the golden calf? The clash of Moses' tablets - or rather God's tablets of the living law - with the idol. And the winner is . . . You made that crystal clear. Indeed. Mark

This Poem was Critiqued By: Rachel F. Spinoza On Date: 2005-08-18 22:07:05
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Interesting poem although I don't know why the high priest Aaron would own or become literal or metaphoric "burnished gold." Are you referring to the golden calf? But his giving in to the people re the "golden" calf was, in my version of the story, done under enormous duress, not something claimed as his own. Perhaps the reference is to something else entirely and if so, I am sorry I missed it. As a Jewish person I am not much versed in Christian theology. Fire on Sinai The Light chizzled stones collide with Aaron's burnished gold. In the crescendo, Immutable, - ....stands. He "stands?" Isn't this kind of bodily personification something that would lead us to a specific image and rather distracting from the holy mystery? Or perhaps this too is a specifically Christian perception? Jesus? Another god is vanquished and Fire returns to Sinai. But was not the "fire" really always [and forever] there? Interesting images. I wish I understood it better. best Rachel

This Poem was Critiqued By: Duane J Jackson On Date: 2005-08-18 15:29:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Paul, What a wonderful testament to the magnificence and power of our Creator. I can almost visulaise the restoration of the mighty flames burning magnificently even as He vanquishes yet another impostor. The piece literally burns with power ---- no flame could possibly burn brighter than the flame of God, the sparkling gold of Aaron gives this piece some amazing color...I'm picturing a volcano now. Hebrew 9:4 '..having a golden altar of incense, and the ark of the covenant overlaid round about with gold, wherein was a golden pot holding the manna, and Aaron's rod that budded, and the tables of the covenant;' Mount Sinai is popularly believed to be the modern day Gebel Musa. The Light chizzled stones collide --- wonderful imagery with Aaron's burnished gold --- i liked this biblical reference; how apt it is In the crescendo, Immutable, Yahveh stands.--- great imagery again...the presence of a victor unscathed Another god is vanquished --- the first one was a calf made of gold and Fire returns to Sinai --- i can picture this fire ablaze again Wonderful Paul. Good conquers evil always and with passion. This was extremely well-written and thought out. Excellent!

This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2005-08-17 19:48:42
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Paul, I'm thinking Aaron brother of Moses and the ten commandments. I may be wrong. The commandments against the gold/the God of greed vanquished. Going into the desert.....[I'm just guessing, doing penance.] Then renewal of the mountain Sinai. Hope I got it. You speak of renewal. This world needs renewal! Thoughtful poem Paul. Good job. Dellena

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