This Poem was Submitted By: James C. Horak On Date: 2006-03-09 09:30:45 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!

Click Here To add this poem to your "Voting Possibilities" list!


Hinging

She wondered if so light a thing,     Treated seemingly so solemnly Might touch upon her leg, nape of neck                                so well. Dressing her with hands, replacing     What it took off, lovingly replacing. Concern to doorsill, level, clasping hinges,     The set of everything seemed to matter. Somehow, to matter.                                                    

Copyright © March 2006 James C. Horak


This Poem was Critiqued By: Mary J Coffman On Date: 2006-04-01 09:16:47
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
James, This is stunning. Perfect title, too. So much going on in this. Lots of wonderful figurative language: "She wondered if so light a thing, Treated seemingly so solemnly..." ...love the combination of assonance/alliteration here - seemingly/solemnly. And, at least to me. the 's' sounds always add such a smoothness to the flow. It just rolls off the tongue effortlessly. This first tercet leaves one sighing in wonder. So much feeling... "Dressing her with hands, replacing What it took off, lovingly replacing." Wonderful. Even in the 'afterglow.' there is still love. The choice to remain and savor the time spent with a special one in our lives. So very soft and romantic feeling here. "Concern to doorsill, level, clasping hinges, The set of everything seemed to matter. Somehow, to matter." To me this verse illustrates the desire to commit every aspect of 'a perfect encounter' to memory. Never to lose one detail of the surroundings, and feelings experienced. Taking a mental photograph, if you will. Throughout this write, as subtle as it is, you never seem to lose track of the sensuality or romance. Without actually speaking of it directly, you convey the entire scene with perfection. And, it's not 'mushy' either! LOL! I applaud you for this. So many times these kind of poems can seem trite, or forced. This is the exception to that! I thoroughly enjoyed reading this! It has a wonderfully smooth flow, and is a very pleasant read. It goes on my winners list immediately! Thank you so very much for sharing this wonderful 'moment' with us. I look forward to more of your work. Be well, James. Warmest Regards, Mary


This Poem was Critiqued By: Jennifer j Hill On Date: 2006-03-14 14:03:56
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi James There are just certain times when you want to remember details of events exactly as they are. The determining factor may seem insignificant to another while atually being intensely important or of great magnitude seen through the writters eyes. And sometimes seeking to grasp the relevence of the situation brings intense purpose to our ponderings. I find this poem to be exquisitely written in such a fashion as to capture the mind and lead the reader through this experience in such a way as to help us feel the love and longing. It actually reminds me of when my Mother died, which might seem morbid to some. But, she had suffered so, got that emancipated look and when she lay her coffin resting so peacefully and looking so plump, she was beautiful and it brought back such memories that I wanted just to stoke her face and let her know how much I love her. I wanted to make everything as perfect for her as I could never do when she was alive. And as you said, "The set of everything seemed to matter" Beautiful rendering James! Best, Jennifer
This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2006-03-12 20:50:38
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.66667
James,' ' I'm probably way off base but.....this reminds me if watching my husband an excavating contractor, when he worked, to watch him handle a piece of equipment was a turn on. So coordinated, so beautiful in talent and motion. To see someone doing such a good job with concern is wonderful. So doing doorsills/hinges as if it matters.....yes it does. to the utmost. Anything everything we do 'right'/or as right as we know and grow....... matters. Love this........ Doing haphazard defeats...us. I'm doing my best even if it doesn't seem so at times. Dellena
This Poem was Critiqued By: arnie s WACHMAN On Date: 2006-03-11 13:32:26
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.25000
I used to tell my patients, or rather ask them "Does it really matter?" In the end does it really matter if you make your bed at all? Does it really matter if you don't eat all on your plate? I guess that this poem kind of answers that! It doesn't! Made me think this poem did.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2006-03-09 16:24:47
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
James, First I have to say the title intrigued me then as if mesmerized I kept coming back and reading this again and again. I have now sat to write this crit at least five times, so here goes. Upon first take, there was the feel of a late morning/early noon tryst…casual, light, alluring…a subtle mutual seduction. Then the after thoughts, was it something more than a casual tryst, was it more meaningful, perhaps that hinged on the moment…the mind set of the involved. Then as if seduced by your writing itself it seems that this is not just simply a physical encounter but a gentle seduction of the spirit, one where muse captures the imagination, takes flight with it to a place where it can experience the most sensual intimate emotions at will, whether it be of mind or perchance a lover, or maybe it is the way the world seduces the innocent. This poem is going to haunt me for awhile for I will keep it and read it again and again and I can’t truly explain why. I know as I write this that I will have sketch pad in hand and try to put your words into images that you’ve place in my mind. I felt chills at “might touch upon her leg, nape of neck, so well” and unashamedly am entranced by this offering. Truly the power of the pen is alive and well in this offering, kudos! Best, Lora
Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

Click HERE to return to ThePoeticLink.com Database Page!