This Poem was Submitted By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2006-08-20 20:21:17 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Catching Sun

I went outside this day and caught some Sun. Atop of me it beamed of its radiance.  Streaming warm upon skin, it then went in. Deep into depths otherwise the unknown  infused with the spirit essence of Sun, it's part of me, I was an element  of it, even though I'm but a little  bit… in the grand equation of it all. 

Copyright © August 2006 Dellena Rovito


This Poem was Critiqued By: Turner Lee Williams On Date: 2006-08-22 09:19:28
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dellena--Scribe indicates through this simplistic and laconic offering an enamorement/appreciation of natures daytime star. This "soaking" of rays is vividly portrayed with enticing imagery; "Streaming warm upon skin, it then went in." AND "...I was an element of it, even though I'm but a little bit…" These well placed (sparse) internal rhymes enhances the write with surprise and wit. Excellent use of season/event/inspiration in penning a gem. TLW


This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2006-08-21 10:54:43
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dellena, Yummy, liked this alot. You've reminded me of a cat going out to stretch in that one spot of sun, the warmth it feels as it stretchs letting the sun's essence and heat invade it's very being. Wow, what a wonderful feeling and such a clever discription of the event. Very enjoyable easy flowing read. Best always, Lora
This Poem was Critiqued By: Ellen K Lewis On Date: 2006-08-21 08:00:31
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi, Dellena. This is a fun reading poem. I think you found a way to bring it all together and then sum it up very nicely. It's short but complete. I like it. I wish I could go out and catch some sun! I have Lupus and can't go out after the sun comes up or before it goes down. That's such a bummer! But at least the inside of my house is 'outdoorsy' (I just made up a word!) Since I can't go out I fill my house with flowers and plants (I mean really full) and that takes the edge off some. I do like this work and the grand equation of it all is awesome! Smiles to you Ellen
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