This Poem was Submitted By: Medard Louis Lefevre Jr. On Date: 2006-09-08 18:18:49 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
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Beyond the Reef Beyond the reef
Your vessel lies
Of the knowing
I am not one
Your precautions are true
Instincts are just
Beyond the reef
You are protected from harm
I watch from the shore
Your staight mast oscillates
With the perpetual waves
Your anchor is firm
I know you must see me
Proposing clear passage
Though you know I cannot
Offer safe harbor
If I could ferry a boat
To bring you in
I am sure your senses
Would discourage the risk
I will stand here waiting
On precarious sands
Tarrying your patience
Or decision to sail on |
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Copyright © September 2006 Medard Louis Lefevre Jr.
This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2006-09-11 12:33:29
Critiquer Rating During Critique: Unknown
Hi Medard....this poem is a metaphorical gem. It is prodound and evocative and I have read it several times so that I might savor the words. It has a sensual and provacative sense that makes it a pleasure to read...somewhat mysterious, as well. I liken this vessel to a woman you are seeing from afar and to whom you would like to offer safe passage and perhaps love. But then I am a hopeless romantic who can find romance in most poetic offerings. This is beautifully written and I find your last stanza a little heart breaking. There you are patiently waiting and uncertain of 'her' decision. Just lovely. I hope I haven't completely fractured your meaning but your words speak to me in this manner. Well done!
Cheers....Marilyn
This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2006-09-09 11:25:54
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Dear Medard,
This poem brings about a clear feeling of isolation to me - it's tucked in, within each line, and
the reader feels the depth of it by the end of the poem.
In this poem, there is nothing to decipher, in word content - it's a crisp clear view, of the message intended.
There is promise, and hope - mixed with hesitancy that stand out by your 4th verse.
I really liked this piece - and am wondering what else you've included, that I overlooked while reading.
Nice job,
sincerely,
Denimari
This Poem was Critiqued By: James C. Horak On Date: 2006-09-09 07:04:14
Critiquer Rating During Critique: Unknown
It is good to see you again, Medard.
Human contact is not fulfilling. That our moments of shared
pleasure are so fleeting, might be why we develop such obsession
with sex, and attempt to create some form of concreted delusion
out of what is becoming more and more emotionally failing. Today,
as far as intimacy, the carnal act is no more satisfying that way
than a handshake.
If one takes away parental devotion to children (and it is seeping
away) home has utterly no meaning.
"Or sail away" is the sad euphemistic option we seldom avoid taking
instead of reaching each other meaningfully.
While the "reef" is the social barrier we construct (or allow
constructed)between ourselves and our diminishing hopes to really connect.
What is left? Perhaps sharing discovery. Of that, there is indeed
much to be had. And perhaps from it, a new intimacy.
There is a stark sincerity to everything of yours I've read. I know of no
other way to answer it.
JCH
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