This Poem was Submitted By: Mark Andrew Hislop On Date: 2006-11-22 17:31:32 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!

Click Here To add this poem to your "Voting Possibilities" list!

Spring

I met a man whose memory was lost and envied him, my longing to be new cheated. His accident of brain became my instant prayer for inconsistency, my new grail, like Christ’s appeal against false prophets, those who, to speak to you, ply used signs so you won’t have to think again. This man had none of that. He was made fresh, said nought and cared less: I was wild, thumping in the rut of history, proving live that point of reference is a mighty blade: to have it, makes us; to not, makes us new.

Copyright © November 2006 Mark Andrew Hislop

This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2006-12-03 16:49:51
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.50000
Hi Mark......thanks for posting and sharing.....the title Spring fits well........my most favorite season is Spring for it is a new beginning for most everything........after winter's nap the earth comes alive and so do we. easy word flow which keeps me reading on. God Bless, Claire

This Poem was Critiqued By: Teresa Green On Date: 2006-12-03 15:47:59
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Mark, I think the average person might get hung up on the "oh, to be new" part of this piece and miss what you are really saying, We are who we are because of the journey. And it is that journey that shapes us. Take that away and we are simply hollow. Enjoyed this piece. Something to ponder... So did I come close at all? LOL Kind regards, Teresa
This Poem was Critiqued By: Ellen K Lewis On Date: 2006-12-03 11:36:38
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.60000
Wow Mark! I can really, really relate to this. You are so right on. Isn't it sad that people who are so very intelligent also have to miss out on the simple (goodness) of life? When a person's brain is totally wiped out (I speak from experience) for whatever reason; birth defect or accident, it is totally born again with new, perhaps less complicated ways of looking at things. On the one hand, I envy them, on the other I am glad I have finally come up from there. I guess the secret is to find a way to be in the middle. I like your form and style but how about that title? Spring Minds or something would be better. I just have a persoanal hang-up about titles I guess. But to be honest, I was expecting something boring, old renewed tales of sunshine etc. I could have easily missed this magnificant piece of work! I like it alot. It's on my list now, so I'm glad I didn't skip over it after all! Smiles, Ellen
This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2006-11-25 20:40:11
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.66667
Mark, Interesting 'thought'. But you're right....it's true. To have an emptiness of the past has its benefits and its setbacks too. There is yin/yang with everything. Information is power. The power to make good/helpful decisions. Without what innocence/and naievity. Not only do you lose wonderful memories as well as weighty memories. But sometime you wonder if alzheimer afflicted people are in a safe place. We would deeply miss your unique thoughts. This is a good/thinking poem... my best to you. Dellena
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2006-11-24 23:02:03
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.92308
Mark, Wow, the depth and the truth cuts very clear here. Yes, to be new, to not remember, no baggage, no sense of guilt whether it be implemented by another or self secured....I like this poem very much and almost envy the man. So much would be left behind but then there are times when that would not be all that regretable. Yet, I guess all in all I'd opt to be selfish and would if could choose what would be lost and what would not. I love your lines and speech in this piece. I can not choose a favorite for I like them all, the piece as a whole would not be as it were if a line subtraction were to occur. Bravo--no nits from this reader...sorry I can stay and spend more time with this write, but please know that I did enjoy and felt great empathy for both charaters in your write. Lora
This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2006-11-24 12:05:28
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.93750
Hi Mark...once again you have written a poem that brims with hidden meanings but it does so in a way that intrigues this reader and makes me want to scream because I can't get inside you thoughts. As I read the first four stanzas I felt empathy for the man who had lost his memory. "his accident of brain" implies a cerebral vascular accident (stroke ) to me and you could certainly be writing about a man who suffered from a stroke. But as I read I began to get the creepy feeling it was more profound than that. I have learned never to take your writing at face value because you never write your thoughts that way. However, I think I choose to believe your are writing about such a man as the words speak to me in that manner. "He was made fresh, said nought and cared less:" I love this line as it is so true to me. I had to put my mother in a nursing home for two weeks before she passed away. The only happy people there were the ones who had lost their memory. So there you go....my take on this poem is not your intent...but I can't help that. However, I am "Mazza" so it will be o.k. lotsa....Mazza
Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

Click HERE to return to ThePoeticLink.com Database Page!