This Poem was Submitted By: Sharon J Eisenmann On Date: 2007-01-14 16:49:17 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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The Devil Writes Poetry

Exploding on the scene,  like a wrestler on Friday Night Smack Down, he commands the attention  of every flunky who frequents the place, with one extreme distinction.  This part is not scripted.  No, I am certain he’s been told to stay behind the curtain.  Not time to show his face… Must be an unforeseen flaw in the system.  His regime is not supreme!  Stringy brown hair, not blond or blue eyed,  so how can he claim same origin  as the race he deems superior?  Yet, look how they line up behind him and pretend dog is dove.  I sense something strange  is lurking above.  Did you not just see that?  Oh god, I think  they are growing too old, blind or drugged  to discern the inherent difference  between a beak and pug. 

Copyright © January 2007 Sharon J Eisenmann


This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2007-01-22 16:46:57
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.86364
Love the title poet and it certainly does draw one near.....you have put together a really good read with lots of images projected along the way. Could not stop laughing in your closing lines........well done with no suggestions as it stands alone.....thanks for posting. God Bless, Claire


This Poem was Critiqued By: Mary J Coffman On Date: 2007-01-15 17:15:26
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Sharon First, let me say, I LOVE the title! I found it very intriguing, and a strong draw to come see just what was contained within the body of this poem. Then, the first word..."exploding..." gives it such a jump start. It catapults the reader right into it. Love the comparison to Friday Night Smackdown, too. *grin* Just in the first lines, you've set such a vivid scene. The verbiage and figurative language throughout this is excellent. The descriptions vivid, complete, and clear. My favorite lines, though, have to be the last..."to discern the inherent difference between a beak and pug...." Left me chuckling big time! Thanks for sharing this wonderful write, my friend. I very much enjoyed it! Warmest regards, Mary
This Poem was Critiqued By: Ellen K Lewis On Date: 2007-01-15 10:52:05
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hello Sharon. This is a very intriging write! I am engrossed more deeply with each word. Although I may find some reason to disagree personally, I find no fault with the write. Your title quickly caught my attention; however I am not sure how it fits into the piece as a whole. The depiction of the devil 'exploding on the scene like a wrestler' is a supreme, and fresh look. I love that picture! *This part is not scripted- now that I disagree with. The following lines I am certain I can agree. No, I am certain he’s been told to stay behind the curtain. Not time to show his face… Must be an unforeseen flaw in the system. .. not a chance, I think. Stringy brown hair, not blond or blue eyed, so how can he claim same origin as the race he deems superior?....now I am in a circle of confusion....this superior race that you mention....it sounds as if you are describing the white man? Am I to believe then that this is not a reference to His people? I don't know, but I don't believe that the white race is superior. The lines following that are quite well written! I am in awe of the way you have finished it. It is easy to see, esp. on this day. I think that even though I disagree with your point of view, your writing is definately well done! Thank you for sharing these things with us. Smiles to you, Ellen
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2007-01-14 16:58:32
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Sharon, This read danced right along, carried this reader to the end without a hitch, smile on face--saying yep, she's got it down, wow-if that isn't true. Wonderful verbiage, colorful, contemporary..definitely from an accomplished pen. I find no nits, enjoyed the read. Lora
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