This Poem was Submitted By: James C. Horak On Date: 2007-02-14 14:29:47 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
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Volition The greatest leaders forge the lead,
prominent in stance and at the prow
To cross icy rivers then and now
engaging enemies on any terms
To thwart the minions of a mad King
taken at the throat when they would
"tread on me."
The war today is on mind alone,
perception blinded and owned and owned.
The prow is not to answer any threat apparent
but to rent upon thought merely apparition.
The boat is now a podium, what's left to
the fight: hearts, arms, legs, marketed alike,
Aztec body parts in a Rivera mural to fright
volition-turned-unmindful of a rattlesnake
on cloth. |
|
Copyright © February 2007 James C. Horak
Additional Notes:
I think that Arnie would agree with me on my reverence for George Washinton, although
not, perhaps, on my view of this current war entirely. So I'm a little restrained from
dedicating this poem to him although we never disagreed on the patriotic values and
meanings of the American soldier. Instead,if I may, I request that any favor any might
have for this offering be given to Moni's lovely poem in remembrance of a man with whom
we all shared TPL. Arnie never lacked support for those brave men and women that defend
this country with their lives. And neither do I.
JCH
This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2007-03-02 19:27:23
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.90909
JCH,
Very good...
Our leaders in the past/Washngton led our men in battle and never asked more than they would give.
But today is a new day of mind and manipulation for personal goals.
Granted yesterday had it's greedy ones but in comparison, I'll take the simple life.
And man kills and dies for nada. Free will..we think we're free! We can live anywhere, do some things,
spend our money at will. But how do most really control their own lives? It's all an apparition.
I like fight and alike complimenting each other.
Hopefully some day I'll say something of value that will make a difference.[like you!]
Ciao,
Dellena
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2007-02-21 09:05:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.86667
James, very well stated and presented and no doubt at all your words brought forth images of great leaders who were not afraid to stand by the side of the men who served under them in battle and fight for what they believed to be true. Our founding fathers fought real foes and were on the frontline themselves and I know we wonder when all this changed for it seems gone is the honor/spirit for many, no longer do we find leaders marching in front of the troups fighting side by side...where has the integrity of these individuals gone to and why has it been so easy for them to give up what people have fought for over the years..... Arnie always stood up for the boys/girls in service from America...he would agree with you and most likely continue to support them all. Certainly well presented and it has no hold back in telling how it is today. Thank you and God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2007-02-15 15:36:38
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.83333
James,
How well stated. Right off it was evident that you were talking about the founding fathers who actually stood for something, fought real foes and were on the frontline themselves (especially Washington)...and how times of changed, gone is the honor, gone is the man who will march in front of the troups and fight side by side...gone is the integrity, traded for the podium where it is played out like staging a commerical campaign to get you to buy a certain product. Yes, Arnie always stood up for the boys in service from America...isn't it a shame that we have to be taught loyalty by someone other than an American. Anyway, I digressed...to the point, this tells it like it is; no holds barred...well done, I commend you and Arnie for the inspiration.
Lora
This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Steven Scheffer On Date: 2007-02-15 12:22:31
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
JCH,
I know i've criticized you before for getting on a soapbox in your poems, for telling and not showing. The recent phenomenon of Mr. Dean has altered by position on this somewhat - as has some reflection on lasting poetic value. Mr. Dean's idiotic and immature phrase - indicative of the stature of his mind - "telly poetry," was a trigger in this regard. I've noted how so many "moderns," particularly on other net sites, load their poetry up with sensory details, descriptions of visible phenomena, as if there were an abhorrence of the abstract, of making a "point." If you read some of the truly, indisputably great poems, such as Tennyson's In Memoriam, you see tons of "points" being made in eloquent, living verse. So . . .
I see my prior critcisms of you as to "telling" show, somewhat, my own being influenced by the "modern" sentiment, though I don't buy into most things "modern" - a subltle, unconsious influence perhaps. Keep making your points. Of course, one must use all the devices at one's disposal in making them more effectively. And imagery, metaphor, and "showing" instead of telling is still more powerful. But the "telling" is necessary, and important, and has been forsaken. So keep at it, keep honing your craft to make your points.
In this poem I thought you used so of the aforesaid devices effectively, such as the subtle assonance in "own" and "prow." I liked the way "prow" and "boat" merged in "podium" - the p from "prow" and the long o from "boat."
Nice work, James.
MSS
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