This Poem was Submitted By: Jana Buck Hanks On Date: 2007-08-07 12:22:50 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Watcher (revised)

I watch them come        shoulder             to shoulder  in shimmering anticipation  we form the cast of millions each an integral part of the whole  from the clouded  distance       in time           and space                they move colorless monochromatic shadows of the lost        legions of warriors             diverse disunited                 ragtag apparitions of senseless death  drawn to cluster  as one     last pass             in review for we watchers on the invisible path fabricated between             our parallel      queues their silent liquid footsteps fall quietly echoing             the quickening                     cadence of my heart these who have fallen and bled out life  for freedom's ring bring     a stinging          tear to my soul in unison  generation       after           faded generation of some sad mother's child finally understands ubiety they no longer are alive but now travel this road  called Glory          heading                home                   harmoniously  at the hands of  watching angelic guides

Copyright © August 2007 Jana Buck Hanks

Additional Notes:
for timeless time....


This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2007-09-04 00:43:50
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.28571
Jana, It is terrible to watch our young soldiers go to war and die. It is usally senseless death which ar for money making endeavors. I am so dissolutioned with our government/our world. I don't think they headed home harmoniously. I think they probably died terrably and for no actual good idealic reason. We have beed duped/over and over. I feel great empathy and sadness for the families affected. I wish everything were so wonderful but my heart says differently. Your poem is written well. I pray for peace. Dellena


This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas H. Smihula On Date: 2007-08-23 10:29:47
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Jana, Yes the legion of warriors given up for the rest of us, we should all show thanks for their contribution to our freedom. Like the flow and the presentation giving the reader a feeling of moving along. Very well thought out piece that gives one time to reflect and reaches depth on the road. Well done, Thanks for sharing. Thomas
This Poem was Critiqued By: Rene L Bennett On Date: 2007-08-11 17:36:55
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
WOW! I was really into your words here. Deep and true. generation after faded generation of some sad mother's child finally understands ubiety they no longer are alive but now travel this road called Glory.......BREATHTAKING!!!!! Rene'
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2007-08-08 05:30:27
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Emotionally packed.....this one is a winner for certain. Your words flow so well and as they do bringing forth one image after another. Taking us back in time, reminding us when our young husbands, brothers, friends served their country well, the many wars over the span of time which took so many lives and the sadness of the hearts left behind. So glad to see you put the angels in to guide them all home for I so believe in and love angels and know they are with us always......I do not recall having the pleasure of reading the original post but I might add this one needs no changes or additions for it is perfect as you have been blessed once more with your gift from God. Take care, God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2007-08-07 22:00:28
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Jana, This has to be one of the finest tributes I have ever read. We need more of this to help us hasten in our own thoughts and memories of the glorious sacrifices made for us. The liquid foot steps, awesome line... and tears of praise and thankfulness, may non of us be the sad mothers who must remember. No nits, I wouldn't change one thing...bravo and kudos my friend....perfection from your accomplished pen. Namaste' Lora
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