This Poem was Submitted By: Thomas H. Smihula On Date: 2007-08-28 11:48:58 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Possibility

Upon the landscape a brilliance, a harvest moon,  in summer Clearness so sharp,  each detail defined, as if a telescope is enlarging its image It slips past the horizon, pulling the mind with it, beyond into the next cycle Yet when viewed again, it is partially eclipsed... for soon it will be a new moon once again…. Like one’s life when given another chance

Copyright © August 2007 Thomas H. Smihula

This Poem was Critiqued By: Rene L Bennett On Date: 2007-09-03 21:07:12
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.76471
Thomas, I love your format here. Your imagery is beautiful. Yea, second changes, sometimes far and few is always a good thing. It is what the person does with that chance that matters. Great write! Rene'

This Poem was Critiqued By: Paul H. Roefs On Date: 2007-09-02 04:11:26
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Thomas, Very nicely written and as clear as an autum eve. I remember that image,I remember that hope and I often cried. Tears have a way of cleansing the windows of both the heart and mind. The imagery in your poem says it all. The read is as smooth as a double barrel bourbon. My only comment is, I don't think you need the last line, because your poem is very clear without defining it. My best to you, Paul
This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2007-08-31 22:05:05
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.75000
Thomas, I enjoyed this. It is hopeful. We all need another chance to 'get it right'. We seem to start over every single day actually. Even every single moment, like an alcoholic trying to change bad habits. And we take our tomorrows for granted. Someday 'chances' will not come....then what? Good poem. Dellena
This Poem was Critiqued By: Debbie Spicer On Date: 2007-08-30 00:33:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dear Thomas, After reading the original “Memories” and “Lad of Seven”, I realized no matter the subject, it much be real and come from deep from the heart. I don’t like to reveal that I have not recovered from my past and I am walking on to do so, but you are so right that we need to get to that place that reveals all. This poem, which I do not totally know where it comes from, is deep and inspiring. You paint a picture, which one can’t deny. I see so much clarity in what you have said yet I don’t know what the reality is for you, but it bring so much to me. The part of the telescope enlarging the image is amazing. It comes and goes, but it remains. With the upcoming eclipse, I see we get another chance, if we are so lucky. I am so sorry for the loss of you’re nephew, and I can see how your wife might be so touched to be in sorry for this, but you speak the truth. This poem is deep from you and I see know that we are spared from the pain for a time, but the cycle comes again. The pain, I pray, will soften with time for all. Very well written and it touches my heart more than you will ever know. My best to you, Debbie
This Poem was Critiqued By: James C. Horak On Date: 2007-08-29 09:41:26
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.00000
The unity of achieving successfully to incorporate the macro/micro cosmic parallelism, the moon versus the cycles of one's life, is an excellent way to end this close examination of lunar wonder. Especially in the sense that lunar influence is dramatic on all such lives...and not just in the theatrical way. Stop using the wrong form of the verb to pass. The declined verb to noun of it is passing, not past and the correct form here is passed. Extraneous to correction, but none-the-less to consideration, when you are looking at the moon close to the horizon you ARE looking through a telescope with the dust particles in the atmosphere (predominate at lower altitude,) the lens. That out of the way, even without rewrite, the poem excels. JCH
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2007-08-28 21:56:36
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.95000
All is possible with your faith and trust in the Lord........and indeed you have created a wonderful image of His beauty in the heavens.....the moon, it never stops amazing me how it just sits there over Mt. Tully and as the evening wears on it slowly circles the house and shines through the lower portion of the house. Your words certainly bring forth the complete brillaince of the Harvest moon........the way the sun slips behind the horizon as evening falls and the moon rises up to brighten our nights........on a nice warm summer night it is so relaxing to sit and watch the stars shine bright in the heavens and all the time the moon is shinning bright on the earth below. Loved this one and indeed we all look forward to the new moon and I do agree that when one is given another chance life begins again....all new, bright and shinning just as the moon shines in the darkness.......Thanks for posting, God Bless, Claire
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