This Poem was Submitted By: Thomas H. Smihula On Date: 2007-11-14 09:10:34 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
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Lad of Seven Just a lad of seven
sitting
next to the street
Just a lad hoping
for joy
listening to his heartbeat
Patience he has
as he waits
on the street
Dreaming of future
listening
to his heartbeat
"Come inside he's not coming!"
Just a little
more time
I won't be deprived
Just a little
more time
I'm sure he'll arrive
Something is wrong
he's delayed
I fear
Something is wrong
I'm sure
he'll be here
" Please come inside he's not going to come!"
I've waited
all day
into the evening
I've watched
all the cars
and surely not leaving
I know that he'll come
at any
time
I know that he'll come
I've committed
no crime
"It's Dark Outside, please come in!"
I reluctantly move
as I walk
towards the door
I reluctantly move
but it seems
such a chore
Now by the phone
I wait
for the ring
Now by the phone
I whisper
but sing
'Love Me Dad'
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Copyright © November 2007 Thomas H. Smihula
This Poem was Critiqued By: Rene L Bennett On Date: 2007-11-30 17:22:55
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.71429
This broke my heart as i read each stanza. Grief, I believe is the hardest hurdle in life to experience, especially for a small child. My heart to yours in this heartfelt piece.
Rene'
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2007-11-15 22:02:57
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.90909
Oh Thomas.......I just knew in my heart where this one was taking me for memories of my own son, spending all day Sunday in the house, sitting by the phone came bursting forth and as in your work the call never came, the boy sat like this Sunday after Sunday.........proud to say he grew into a fine man, is married with two girls of his own and he has a relationship with his dad after many years of disappointment. I am certain this will touch the heart of many who have been there too. Where there is love I do believe hope also lives within.....God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2007-11-14 15:37:52
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.75000
Hi Tom...the ending of this piece stopped me cold! I never expected it and became instantly sad when I read the words. Of course I went back to the beginning and read the words again and became even more sad. I could feel how this boy, of seven, wanted so badly for his dad to come see him. I'm thinking the parents were divorced or seperated and how that must tear a little one apart, as they love both parents. Great poem with a twist at the end that is stunning. Well done.
Marilyn
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