Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

This Poem was Submitted By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2008-02-16 00:38:04 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!

Click Here To add this poem to your "Voting Possibilities" list!

The Dragon Inside

The day crept into being as a scavenger seeking to eat the dead Watchful, hungry, in wait for the moment to masticate Taking, as time takes the hours away, gone, lost into ever Servant to the body, savior of mind, forgiven then forgotten To the front, onto the top, over board to duality of spirit Innocent, raw, naively blessed unto the holiness of self Unknowing unchallenged, loser of the battle raging for eternity Blood bathing, ripped heart, spineless forfeiture of the soul. Stars and galaxyâ€™s shinning above me, and nobody loves me Useless to matter, zero to wonder, and triple minus to know Cause it will gain you everything and nothing just as equally It all doesnâ€™t mean anything, they're just thoughts from whiles ago.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Rene L Bennett On Date: 2008-03-07 05:35:38
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.76923
Dellena, You took me through several emotions in this piece. The 1st stanza was most mild, kind of sad...the 2nd stanza, you pick your mood up and actually seems like anger flew from your pen and the 3rd stanza, I liked best of all....It doesn't really mean anything (lol) they are thoughts from awhile ago..(perfect) Always, Rene'

This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Steven Scheffer On Date: 2008-02-17 00:59:48
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dellena, We all have a destiny, I think. I don't mean that in grand, eternal terms. Because we are unique, and, even absent any religious dimension, admittedly a sort of a grand freak of nature, that destiny involves more than just procreating and fulfilling the needs that are basic to all animals. And for each of us it is different. I like to think that success means locating that destiny and either fulfilling it or, if some curse of fate prevents that from happening, dying on the road toward that destiny. Maybe then what happens after that doesn't matter. The tragedy is throwing it, our destinies, away, for nothing - gambling, drink, video games, golf,whatever. We all have destinies grander than those things that claim us in our weakness. Your poetry invites reflection. That's a credit to it, and you. The style here is rough, and raw, and fits your subject. MSS

This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2008-02-16 15:18:11
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi D....thank heavens for your last line...I was beginning to worry about you! Such a dark poem full of angst and sorrow. You have written some scary images but did it with skill. You also have some unusual phrases that are clever play on words....lost into ever....from whiles ago...holiness of self....useless to matter, zero to wonder.... Very compelling and different. You may just have out-done yourself! Good read! Blessings....marilyn

Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

Click HERE to return to ThePoeticLink.com Database Page!