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This Poem was Submitted By: Kenneth R. Patton On Date: 2008-12-16 09:37:35 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Among the Leaves

They lay among the leaves that early eve The ache not only in their hearts A soldierâ€™s tale just one in an everlasting line Not asked, but told they must bear the unbearable In desperation they tore at cloth blotting it all out... ...Raking through leaves and glass curiously sifting at woods edge they caught her eye "Wow, old dog tags, Interesting" She studied the unfamiliar name "I wonder how they got here?"

Additional Notes:
In the local newspaper I read about a lady raking her yard and finding some WWII dog tags. That, of course, got me thinking...

This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Steven Scheffer On Date: 2009-01-06 16:46:20
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.85714
Ken, You fall off her from last month. Ah, don't I know what flotsam surfaces in the wake of the Muse. ): MSS

This Poem was Critiqued By: Rene L Bennett On Date: 2008-12-31 12:29:25
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.66667
Kenneth, Excellent write! I seriously enjoyed this especially after reading your inspiration. Yes, I re-read this and I can see the imagery and the thought you have here. It would make one think the stories those old dogs tags hold. It would really be awesome if there was some way of looking the name up somehow. (Wouldn't it?) Wow, now you have me wondering on this one tracked mind. I like the pondering this piece has given me. Always, Rene'

This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2008-12-24 15:31:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Kenneth, Interesting, 'dog' tags for soldiers giving their lives in war. As if they were nothing but fighting mad dogs. The only true id reassuring others of whom was dead if they were unrecognizable. I think the day will soon be here of dog tag microchips for everyone. You pull the story along into being very poetically. Having one wonder of the man who left his warrior footprint behind. Good job... Dellena

This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2008-12-17 21:21:11
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
What a treasure to be found.....perhaps you might improvise and do yet another poem finding the family to which these dog tags belong.......good word flow, providing many images and emotions as well. Indeed, so many have worn dog tags during their service days and after as well. I know my son who is grown and married with children of his own now has his dad's dog tags.....something to hold onto and let the memories flow. Thanks Ken for posting and sharing with us. Merry Christmas to you and yours, God Bless, Claire

This Poem was Critiqued By: Duane J Jackson On Date: 2008-12-16 10:01:38
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Kenneth, Thank you for making this a discovery for us here at tpl. Again kudos to those who risk their lives for our well being and safety. I understand that this is a narrative, yet was keenly looking for a unique image or phrase to add to the read. Keep writing :-) Duane.

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