This Poem was Submitted By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2009-07-25 01:09:17 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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"HE"

Blades deep, tinged dark green,  Conquer miles Above hovers  an ivory cloud   sitting timidly alone Squinting up  it appears to be formed   in the shape of a crucifix    Which sight of quickens warmth through my being     Then cool spins upwards around      as if encased in frozen air Is â€œHe” watching? Dismayed by desperation capping off each day?  Wicked trumps good hearts   while waiting for the last card    in the pile to infuriate â€œHim” enough to wave â€œHis” mighty hand,      Command and let loose torture water      through a hose spraying grass,        Mortal, material scorching all with contempt Forgiveness stilled  Forever Pushing my hair aside  keying one finger over bangs   aware of reality    I contemplate significance   The cloud unmoved as if glued to the sky  I wonder when, but never why.

Copyright © July 2009 DeniMari Z.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas H. Smihula On Date: 2009-07-29 09:04:06
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
DeniMari, Well thought out piece and especially the ending with the eternal thought within. The words are easy to follow and the picture painted. Nicely done. Thanks for sharing.

This Poem was Critiqued By: James C. Horak On Date: 2009-07-26 09:47:18
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
In anticipation of divine intervention we muse over many a circumstance, ominiscience not being at all what it's cracked up to be. Does God observe some Prime Directive of his own? And does our self-perfection under fire play that much into all of it? The adepts would say the question earns the answer...may even be more important. Your poem is an astute acknowledgement of the quandary all face in our personal travels through life and how we grow seemingly less certain by the examples of all that "encased in frozen air". While we look for signs, and they do not come, like "The cloud", "glued to the sky" duration itself becomes our greatest trial. Even worse, with the failings to actually perceive karmic balance, "Forgiveness stilled/Forever, we have come a long way in retaining soul substance to be able to say, "I wonder when, but never why." Grand.
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