This Poem was Submitted By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2010-05-18 17:50:15 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
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Rainbow's End Rain's fall ceased to spill upon the ground
Clouds spent passed through the clearing sky
Sun's shine beamed brightness back to day
Flaring light waves became a multi-hued display
A rainbow's bend was set to color the sky
To drape o'er high as woven tapestry
In view the cloth of reverie's design
With breadth of vista that does reach an end
Not with kettles of gold and leprechauns
But golden none the less, from the quest
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Copyright © May 2010 Dellena Rovito
This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2010-05-30 13:58:35
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Very nice Dellena, I prefer your 2nd verse in this poem for the imagery that stands out so well.
Rainbows are such a beautiful part of the end of a storm - (I saw one that was a triple arch over an open bridge months ago) and it was breathtaking.
Enjoy "A rainbow's bend was set to color the sky", but think you could enhance the first verse as you did in the 2nd.
Nice poem,
blessings,
Deni
This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2010-05-27 12:33:12
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Dellena,
You have a talent for drawing the human condition into a tangible fabric.
Your subjects lead each sentence, “Rain’s fallâ€, “Clouds spentâ€, Sun’s Shineâ€, “flaring Lightâ€, “a rainbows bendâ€, all add instant poignancy to each line in the first stanza.
“With the breadth of vistaâ€, and later the ends of the rainbow; I am not left with a fairy tale of Irish cause, rather the quest of living, maybe the improvements desired, and that in the end, it is the journey, not the acquisition, that is the treasure.
A very fine piece. I think on of your best!
This Poem was Critiqued By: cheyenne smyth On Date: 2010-05-19 10:16:31
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Dellena,
I am a sucker for nature poems and this one is no exception. You have some lovely phrases, word selection and flow. I see you rhymed the first verse but not the second. Is there a reason for this or is it just the way it came out? I often see free verse with a little rhyming and your poem is not compromised by that. You have made the lines work even though the syllable count is not even. As far as I'm concerned the poem works as written. Well done.
Best wishes,
cheyenne
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