This Poem was Submitted By: Mandie J Overocker On Date: 2010-10-09 22:01:45 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Solace in Season

Winding roads and whispering trees solace to the soul so deep. But autumn’s vibrant hues and shades unsettle as peace evades. Momentary twinge of regret matters wanted to forget. Elusive grasp the sands of time hurtling through chasms resigned flock barren mindscape once more. Awakening impressions ignored irrecoverable sense betrayed vulnerable mind that has played. Winter’s ascent, so long awaited, suspend again thoughts vacated. Encapsulating each memory, holding fast to the safety created by the frozen blast, chilled within among the past. Spring’s descent, a new day dawns in frozen thaws, exhausted yawns. Warmth seeps through miniscule cracks countermanding wintry wrack, as summer’s arrival brings anew, happenstance to imbue solace to a soul so deep of winding roads and whispering trees.

Copyright © October 2010 Mandie J Overocker

This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2010-11-05 08:29:14
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.93333
Beautiful poem Mandie, with precise uncomplicated verses that stand out and bring the images to life. Your emotions show through with chosen words that add impact - to each season, each moment felt and are thought provoking as well as deep, deep to the core of the soul. I've read this twice, and honestly have no changes to suggest nor any nits or words that I would change in this write. Awesome job! One of my favorite's from you. Blessings, Deni

This Poem was Critiqued By: kevin Dunn On Date: 2010-11-04 00:12:52
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hello Mandie. First I must say I like it a lot . I read a poem first just thinking of how it entertains me Then I ask myself do I understand it and what exactly is the writer tying to say to me. As much as I like it I need some help with this one. I don't get too hung up on meter with other folks stuff, if I did I might trip on many a good read but it did require a little work to get it to flow off the lips. please reply and explain what you are saying to the reader. Regards. Kevin.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2010-10-22 20:56:12
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Mandie, this is a wonderful piece; graphic and visual. I found myself in the spring of the winter after; mostly from placing myself in the winter of my content. The peacefullness and the draw of the season; both the actual and the emotional feelings externalized, caught me and kept me. i particularly appreciated "irrecoverable sense betrayed -vulnerable mind that has played; and for the feelings that mimic the season, or the season that inhances the feelings, that plays often in my spirit and my mind. I know the "encapsulating each memory", well spoken, well said. A very well written, poignant verse. Excellent submittal.
This Poem was Critiqued By: cheyenne smyth On Date: 2010-10-18 16:43:18
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Mandie, This is a lovely poem with fresh word choices and liquid flow. Your rhyming couplets are well done with the exception of deep/trees which doesn't rhyme. However, upon the second read I see you have done that more than once so I'm certain it is deliberate. In no way does it diminish this excellent poem. You have written so many delicious phrases that I can't pick a favorite without ignoring the rest. Well done. Best wishes, cheyenne
This Poem was Critiqued By: Duane J Jackson On Date: 2010-10-16 11:53:59
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Hi Mandie, I liked the idea of closing with the opening couplet - it ties the piece together. I can tell that the voice used to express the emotions are strong but did feel that the piece could let off more punch if it were clipped to a more concise version. The lines 5 and 6, for example could somehow be clubbed with line 3 of verse 2. That would also help in maintaining the unque quality of each line. Duane.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2010-10-14 19:36:17
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Mandie, nicely done...excellent thoughts of what the season holds. Just a couple of suggestions; [But=delete] autumn’s vibrant hues and shades" and "created by [the=delete] frozen blast" will help to tighten this up a bit. Good verbiage and an easy flow move your reader through your stanzas easily. An enjoyable read... Lora
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