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RESPECT - Ladies & Gents We Have to See Smart, classy, savvy pretty lassie. Single, sane with no one to blame. Sobbing, heart throbbing mindless pain; love never stays for men betray. Took her on a ride in a different mode. Then let her off in the darkness of their road. |
Additional Notes:
Deni has been solo for over 3 years plus and has found growth in herself yet still has to realize the world is full of people who will never know the true meaning of respect for another person in life. Solo again in one month and WOW - how did I not see this coming?
This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2011-11-29 11:33:55
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Deni, I guess it is in poor taste to enjoy the classic, 1800’s style of this piece. It is almost limerick-al.
What most struck me in the first line, is “my kind of girlâ€- and then “no one to blame†said poor girl in my mind.
The “sobbing†and “pain†grants a level of credence to “men betrayâ€. Having survived similar, in my mind I changed it to “people betrayâ€, but as a side note, I really don’t care for a cavalier attitude. I believe Michael Jackson in his song “She’s Out of My Life†says it all.
To think for two years she was here
And i took her for granted i was so cavalier
When I was done reading, again and again, it was as if I was let off on the “darkened road†with the author. I wanted to embrace and comfort the tears.
As I said, poor taste in retrospect, but delightful in the reading. Well done.