This Poem was Submitted By: Ellen K Lewis On Date: 2012-07-09 14:48:50 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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the Gift of Poetry

I am a POET I write of the living today and share history with the world in the most nostolgic way surety for the journey into tomorrow lay aside my petty sorrows In the garden of my rocks I find a gem and rub and polish another reason to write I am a POET. Flowers are not forgotten even as they disappear scents of time are savored realized and lived again and again "for there is nothing lovely as a tree" unless you've never seen one. Time will not be forgotten as long as there are poets and those who read them For those who sow and reap will always need to be watered rebirth and growth I am a POET.

Copyright © July 2012 Ellen K Lewis

Additional Notes:
do I have ~style~creativity~freshness~ have I used good word choices ~ rhythm or rhyme~ have I carried my idea through ~ have I kept on topic ~ am I too wordy or over extended ~ have I left too many open ends? Did I force my lines to rhyme ~ thanks


This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark D. Kilburn On Date: 2012-08-01 18:43:17
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Let me start with a few very minor suggestions that may or may not make sense to you. 1.Line six, I like sorrow a lot more than sorrows. 2.Line eight, and rub and polish, how about to or I rub and polish just eliminating an and. 3.fifth line from the bottom and those who read them, perhaps for those or all those instead of and. I like the opening rhyme alot, from there the rhyming isn't quite as strong but that's okay and didn't bother me at all. I also like the way you used the stolen and cliche lovely as a tree, I thought that was very nice and well done. Overall I found it to be a very pleasent read of a very well written poem. The only other minor suggestion is to maybe split into a couple three four verses instead of the long continual verse. These are all very small things that may improve the read or may not, overall message is well done. mk


This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2012-07-29 10:34:54
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
So Ellen, we are here to illuminate ourselves; through the eyes of like. Of the intuitions in your theme, the finding –rocks- in this world and polishing them into –gems- the concept is as precise to a poet as any I have read. I am not sure that in light of all of it, personal –sorrows- become –petty- I would counter they are as valuable in the scheme of things as any other rock. That is, unless your point is that those –sorrows- are so overdone that they squeeze out the perspective of living and poetry. You capture the cycles observed and written of, flowers gone and remembered, scents of recall and the emblematic innate beauty of a tree- when really considered. An you counter all of your treatise with the –sow and reap- with the overview that in doing so is watering the poets –rebirth- You have many topics that could each be written into an epic, concise and to the point- from metaphor to analogy. I think, from this piece- being a poet is probably a good thing.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2012-07-09 15:40:56
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Hello Ellen, Very different, nice word choices, good flow and yes I believe you stayed on track *smile* and you did make your point clearly. You also made me chuckle both with your poem and your added notes... nicely done. Lora
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