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At Five in the Afternoon You made it more than bearable. You are gone, and the beat of a conjugate drum. Your black tresses, your foreign tongue . . . You made the Main Spanish. Ghost ships with red crosses zigzag forever, forever zigzag, searching for you. A wind moves them knowing why they move. A sword, a cape and a bull linger at the edge of perception, as if eyes more than human saw them. A refrain falls to the ground, a refrain that carries your sound. It blows louder at five in the afternoon. |
Additional Notes:
Not "about" Lorca. Remember: poems are figurations that fill an absence or void in the poet or man with images, metaphors, figures, tropes, language and rhetorical structure. Lorca gave me (us) some splendid figurations, and the allusion to one is intimate in this poem.
I've never referred to a man's hair as "tresses," or heard the beat of a "conjugate" drum with a man . . . and am not about to start at 51. :)
This Poem was Critiqued By: Joe Gustin On Date: 2013-01-12 11:53:59
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Ok. When I read this poem it brought to mind Columbus and other first time explorers to the new world. I may not understand this work compleatly however it was very enjoyable. I do wonder about L1 in S2. would "with" intsead of "and" serve the poem better?