This Poem was Submitted By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2014-03-31 08:53:54 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
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Over Mountains Softly sip
sweet liquor of life
drink to ponder a
pint of wonder
aged as fine wine as
your inner voice nudges
to follow the divine.
Inhibitions bale
the happy soul sails
over the dim
where the beast sits in.
Dark lies can be seen
as fine feathers fly toward sun
his ruse and disguise materialize
after the damage is done.
Damn his plan with steadfast prayers
that speaks to keep you guarded with care.
Grace will shine upon your face
lest cumbersome burdens with peace are replaced. |
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Copyright © March 2014 DeniMari Z.
Additional Notes:
Re-write of an older poem - Title has changed and the poem is tightened up being less wordy.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Joe Gustin On Date: 2014-04-05 11:03:34
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
This is such a soft and gentle poem on the subject of faith. Highly original without the preachy feel. Thank You
This Poem was Critiqued By: Terry L Krieg On Date: 2014-04-01 18:51:59
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Enjoyed this very much! It brings to mind times when "inhibitions bale" and I find myself spending time in prayer.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2014-04-01 15:03:11
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Deni, and enjoyable write. I can see the analogy of difficulties and mountains; the ending where time and persistence maybe?
The dark, and the curse, with the consolation and "peace" once arrived accent the entire piece.
That you added a personage to the darkness- and the remedy is prayer; reinforce what was spoken before.
And encouraging piece particularly for those who recall the motivation it takes to overcome what must be.
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