This Poem was Submitted By: Mark Steven Scheffer On Date: 2014-11-15 08:27:49 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Dog Dreaming

                                                                                                     His leg twitches: he is mounting a bitch,                                                                                                      or devouring a rabbit in a field of rhododendrons.                                                                                                       Or he sees Ezekiel’s spinning wheel; the long                                                                                                       stride of a young DiMaggio: he now knows                                                                                                      something rumored by other dogs is real.                                                                                                       You are not amused: angels bring messages from God                                                                                                      to your kind, for real, and you are wake dreaming                                                                                                      the transports of a dog. But you are yet master:                                                                                                      as if he heard, his leg stops twitching.                                                                                                       Someone drops a spoon.                                                                                                       You mouth, involuntarily, don’t, don’t.                                                                                                      But his eye opens anyway, to a room with flesh                                                                                                      but less carnality, with spirit but less divinity,                                                                                                      to his constant love, glorious you.                                                                                                       He seems happy, but you a little less . . .                                                                                                      You wish you a little less, a little lower than human,                                                                                                      an obedient, heated, unelusive mastiff.                                                                                                       He senses something off, head turned at you.                                                                                                       In lieu of such incarnation, of which you are incapable,                                                                                                      you resolve it is time to get him that saved, savory bone.                                                                                                      Things seem righted, and he is ecstatic:                                                                                                      he has his bone, and is subject to his love,                                                                                                      who has again become the subject,                                                                                                      lost in his musing, like his God,                                                                                                       with something like regret at making his poem. 

Copyright © November 2014 Mark Steven Scheffer


This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2014-11-27 14:55:39
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
You know, I never begin typing and saving your critique before I defeat your formatting. I copy the spaces before your first line, go to “replace” in word, and replace them all with nothing. Bingo, I can actually edit a response! A fun piece, theology aside. (I can’t remember a single verse that might ascribe and understanding of God, to animals), nevertheless- I like the use in the context of this piece. It was also interesting (animal or human) describing the change from the ethereal of the dreams, to a carnal, oh, I am home perspective when the eyes open. Of the god like qualities of the master, and the reach into the dreams of the beast; to the interference (I suspect just for a bit of fun or investigation) it makes me suspect an allegorical meaning. (With me, if you read such, I guarantee anything that isn’t direct, has a back story hidden in the text). I don’t know, I always overthink your verse, I believe. It is the power of your writing that makes me want to find the more. I adored your ending, “with something like regret at making his poem” though frankly, having written on many different planes, there is probably a indices line within that says… now this is something special. Enjoyed the read immensely.


This Poem was Critiqued By: Joe Gustin On Date: 2014-11-21 14:47:10
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
I would never of thought it would be possible to write so much about such a tiny event of a dogs leg twitches. Yet here we are with a well delivered poem of things I would never have dreamed of let alone write about. Such a great trip through a dog's dream I will have to learn to see more. Well done, an excellent work
This Poem was Critiqued By: Medard Louis Lefevre Jr. On Date: 2014-11-21 02:10:36
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
I am sure that it is just by chance that I had to trim the dead branches of the rhododendron next to my porch and that I gave my eldest son my Joe DiMaggio signed baseball both today and that all of my dogs have been bitches (or as I prefer, females). Stayed away from Ezekiel 1:15-16 (didn't relate to that today). My dog, Crissie is an Alpha female, not an Alpha male. She is a Border Collie, which probably makes her even more alpha. She is 11 years old and still pees (marks her territory) over where the male dogs do and she is brilliant (for a dog). I only have had female dogs. I think this definitely says more about me than them. No weird thing going on here other than I have always preferred the disposition of female dogs. The only thing subject to critique(mine, not yours) is that I have always loved and been fascinated by women, but I (as usual, state in these moments), digress. "A little lower than human", am I sensing a pattern? No, I don't think so. This is just a poetic and observational writing about a good, simple dog who deservingly gets his bone and despite our projections is completely unaware of his majesty and divinity. In other words, loved this writing, love dogs, and thanks for the post! Too many levels to respond to, only the one I had the most fun with! Again, thank you! Medard
This Poem was Critiqued By: Marcia L McCaslin On Date: 2014-11-15 10:18:31
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
“with something like regret at making his poem.” Well, being a dog watcher I was right there with you on the whole thing, and feeling pretty proud of myself for having advanced a rung to be able to say that—and then that last line. Now my spirit said to me: Marcia, that is a darn-good line—think about it, so I did have to to and it came to me that dogs do exhibit “something like regret” and then I was really ‘taken’ with it! We have two rescued dogs, and the big lab was really abused for 6 yrs. My heart has always gone out to her (now she has a good home) and I often stop and rub her and scratch her while she’s resting/sleeping and you can see she really enjoys it. Sometimes, she wrinkles up with a “smile”—but the second I quit, there’s that sort of sigh/resignation that “it was too good to last” LOL & she has that regret look as she goes back to sleep. YAY. So, bottom line, great piece. Thanks for posting!
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