Thomas H. Smihula's E-Mail Address: tsmihula@sbcglobal.net
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Poem Title	Poet Name	Critique Given by Thomas H. Smihula	Critique Date
Delay	James C. Horak	Like how you maintained the structure and rhyme with powerful words and phrases. Stolen moment, ending decively, too old these are the words that bring depth into the poem. Well done James. Thomas	2007-12-07 09:16:27
Those That Kill Their Own	James C. Horak	Viewpoint well expressed as always. To me it is not speed in receiving the blow but the fear of what lies ahead yet the slowness made others think and grieve with the bearing of the cross only to be relish in the resurrection when it occurred. Some approach it quickly well others just want to take it slow both have there drawbacks. Really enjoyed reading this for it makes the reader think, title throws me off a little but does not distract from your words. Thanks for sharing as always. Thomas	2007-12-07 09:11:51
When the Monkey Grinds the Organ	James C. Horak	James, Like this simple but to the point piece. There are no guarentees on understanding. Point well taken. Thanks for sharing this will be my last month for a minimum of 4 to 5 months otherwise I will not be coming back. Appreciate all your writings and thought provoking presentations. Well written piece here. Thanks, Thomas	2007-12-06 09:58:20
JOHN IS	Mark D. Kilburn	Mark, The format keeps the reader into the thought throughout each stanza. The ending is my favorite in this piece for it gives us a thought to ponder on besides the one already presented. I like poetry the forces the reader to think beyond that which is presented. Well done. Thanks as always for sharing your piece. Thomas	2007-12-06 08:27:15
An Elegy For The Complication	Thomas Edward Wright	Thomas, What I like about this piece is a picture of life and the ups and downs, the memories and thoughts held within. Story of this life is shown by the words and does keep the reader into the piece. This reader did at times have difficulty with the format that runs together making the reader force the pause that would enhance the delivery. Just this readers opinion. Thanks for sharing a life. Thomas	2007-12-06 08:22:47
Tapestry	marilyn terwilleger	Memories are shown within this moment of time. One that is physically gone yet remains within the thoughts is what I see expressed here. This place will always stay clear and the beauty sending its brillance throughout the years. Thanks for sharing as always. Thomas	2007-12-06 08:14:51
A Filioque	Thomas Edward Wright	Thomas, Enjoyed this ballet of life experience. Each of us a different road and feeling when we encounter similar circumstances. You have shown this in your chapters each representing a different time yet memory of its occurence still in its place to ponder on. Very enjoyable read and you gave this reader depth. Well done. Thanks for sharing, Thomas My road may soon be ending and maybe there is hope for something beyond. If that hope bears out then I will be back to the PTL but not for at least four to five months. If the road ends then this will be the last month of critiqing. Thought I would let you know I am not abandoning the site for each of us has contributed and especially you. Just wanted to let you know. Tomorrow is when I find out what my alternatives are, it has been 11 years since the last time they removed a brain tumor and now that one has appeared again I will soon know how to approach it. I am only mentioning this to a few, such yourself, who have expanded their horizons.	2007-12-05 09:19:39
Sparrow Tears	marilyn terwilleger	Life reborn from all the memories. Nicely relayed and an enjoyable read. I like the ending giving us new life within the difficulties we face. Well done. Thanks for sharing, Thomas	2007-12-04 13:08:21
Inner Oceans	Mary J Coffman	This is the second poem that I have read this month that I think is outstanding. This takes a scene and presents detail along with a thought. Well done, Well done. Thomas	2007-12-04 12:22:24
Ticket in her pocket	Deborah L Bird	Thank you Michael for allowing us to see the thoughts she shared with you and the love you two shared. This is definately a tribute. Thanks again, Thomas	2007-12-04 11:34:43
Memories and Smiles	Rene L Bennett	A nice well rhythmed piece and the structure intack. Although simple words they have depth for the mind itself has depth. Well done enjoyed reading, Thomas	2007-12-04 11:30:48
Out Of Season	Dellena Rovito	Dellena, I feel a relationship as life is lived by the flower, each performs differently at the next season, some live once again while others slowly wilt away. Nice presentation and thought relayed. Thanks, Thomas	2007-12-04 11:10:26
Beneath The Mask	Rene L Bennett	Rene, The words are fine but for this reader the format seems to need more impact. Example: Sadness overwhelms me deep as at night alone I weep You cannot see my pain inside yet you never even tried I know what you wish to see as you say you're proud of me This gentle smile on my face belongs to me with all her grace It took sometime to place her there so daily she is what I wear Just for you she'll smile away hoping she will make your day as you pretend it's all real never knowing how I feel And when you go to sleep at night assure yourself I am alright Your security blanket hides so well that I'm still in this living Hell Not the answer but just a thought. Thanks for sharing, Thomas	2007-12-04 11:04:39
Sighs of Autumn	marilyn terwilleger	Marilyn, Althought an old poem it brings back, what the writer's thoughts were, at the time of season changing. It is good to reflect back and regain a visual. I enjoyed reading this piece. This will be my last month for critiquing poetry for at least the next several months possibly longer for I will be taking care of some of life's challenges over the next few. Thanks for sharing your work, Thomas	2007-12-04 10:40:33
Pastel	Mary J Coffman	Mary, Always enjoy colors that are peaceful that represent a feeling or thought. You flow throughout this piece and it is an enjoyable read. Life is shown, well done. Thanks for sharing, Thomas	2007-12-04 10:32:27
Watching Time	Rene L Bennett	Rene, Love the wording in this piece, yet it is difficult for this mind to focus on the structure with the double break between lines. Remember this is only my opinion and I like to see flow and stanza structure. Maybe if it was a little shorter but then I would miss some of the great words the represent the thought. Thanks for sharing, Thomas	2007-12-04 09:59:53
Green Christmas Purse	Lola Blaze	Love the thought behind this, packaged so nicely for the reading. Great poem to make the reader dwell on the thought during this season or any time of the year. Well done... Thanks for sharing, Thomas	2007-12-04 09:56:28
Mortal Wings	marilyn terwilleger	Marilyn, I always enjoy the different styles of poetry and the thought that is still communicated to the reader from the words. To maintain a structure and still present the thought is the gift. Well written poem. Thanks for sharing really enjoyed seeing a new format, Thomas	2007-12-04 09:51:38
The Misguided	Dellena Rovito	This makes the reader think on the subject and I believe that was the intent. Your structure is well prepared and flows making it easy for the reader to understand the thought presented. You present a viewpoint and mix in the politics that make decisions. Well done. Thanks for sharing, Thomas	2007-12-04 09:40:25
Tattered Prayer	marilyn terwilleger	Marilyn, I enjoyed the transition from colors to life itself as you brought this to the reader in the second grouping. Just as enjoying was the movement from one type of structure to another giving the reader an additional time to ponder on the words. Wording is well selected. Great piece of work. Thanks for sharing, Thomas	2007-12-04 09:37:19
Trapping Down (A Re-post)	James C. Horak	James, I like the wording, but had some difficulty with the flow especially in the first stanza. This made me pause to long and made me go over the stanza again, without flowing to the next. Your second and third stanza's seemed to have flow between each other yet the second did not have impact as does your last. That is my favorite in this piece. Maybe if this was reversed with the last being the first and a single line with impact for the ending. Just a thought and only this readers opinion. Thanks, Thomas	2007-09-06 09:21:21
Enduring Love	Paul H. Roefs	Paul, Yes words are important in nuturing the relationships between individuals, and you have stated that elequently in this piece. Silence can also play an important role if invoked at the right time depending on the moment. Many of the words that seem sincere yet have no meaning at all as time moves forward, this is the part to me is missing showing that there are two ways in which words are expressed those that have meaning. I like what you have stated yet there is so much more depth to this topic and I want more. Just this readers opinion. Good poem it makes me think. THomas	2007-09-04 09:05:41
Footprints in Dew	Kenneth R. Patton	Ken, I think observations are the best way to soothe the soul and share it with others. That is why I like poetry for it gives one that opportunity to express a visual they have seen and the thoughts that come to mind. Well done and the structure was good, the thought complete. Well done.	2007-08-31 15:46:14
Trapped	Rene L Bennett	Rene, This reader enjoys reading poems about releasing feelings and you have done it well here. As you journey on the path of writing you will find sometimes it becomes harder and harder to show the depth by the consistent rhyming that will take one away from the actual thought. At first I thought this would be the case but as you moved forward the word usage 'this is real', 'another day', screaming in my head', 'now bare' brought me into the depths once again. The area that started we to wonder was the third and fourth, along with the seventh and eighth lines. Enjoyed reading this. Well done. Thomas	2007-08-30 09:45:20
TRAUMA, THE REALITY	Debbie Spicer	Debbie, Now I feel present within this piece, no holds barred the leaf removed. This does show me depth and gives me more to focus about. It brings a moment that never leaves the mind although it can be placed into a different mode. You are right it will never go away and the hurt will always be felt yet life does go on and by releasing it your chances are better. Well done. Your friend, Thomas	2007-08-30 09:35:31
I Saw You Smile	Rene L Bennett	Rene, I loved the thought behind this piece and the movement that blended into each stanza. Only once did I have a pause and that was in your second stanza where you use 'wind' then 'again' and I did not get the eveness you had brought forth previously in the previous stanza and those that followed where you had the second and forth lines rhyme. Maybe it is just me. Very well written poem with rhyme and thought. Thanks for sharing. Thomas	2007-08-29 09:41:22
The Cat	Dellena Rovito	Dellena, Is this more than just a cat...I sense depth here with the cat actually being someone that requires attention but receives no more than a stroke. You have captured me into this piece wanting me to go deeper and deeper into the feelings and that to me is poetry. Well done and thanks for sharing this was very enjoyable. Thanks, Thomas	2007-08-29 09:34:09
From Trauma To Transformation	Debbie Spicer	Debbie, You know you always get a honest opinion here and rarely will I make comment about improving upon a piece. There are two things that were reflected in this writing, the first I felt you tried to hard to rhyme and that will detere, at least this reader, from the depth of the poem. Example display could have just as easily been play for that is what we all partake in while we live. Second you held back and that is not your norm for you speak from the heart, so no holes barred. To me this is a surface poem not grabbing me like most of yours. Just some thoughts and only from this reader. Thomas	2007-08-29 09:30:14
Youth	Jana Buck Hanks	Jana, What say I, love the crytal tears that show they can be fragile. Not living life to its fullest not necessary youth. We are all innocent to some degree for we never stop learning. Like the words selected, like the presentation and movement between stanza's. A very well written piece that to me does not just reflect youth. Thanks for sharing. Thomas	2007-08-29 09:22:10
A GLYMPSE OF HEAVEN	Monica ONeill	Monica, How I like how you make the reader sense a moment and dig into the poem you have written. Missing one, Losing one, remembering one these are all important and they shine in this piece. I like the presentation for you move the reader along and the ending where you show how important the words have been. Well done, Thomas	2007-08-29 09:16:25
Living In The Questions	Nancy Ann Hemsworth	Nancy, I like how you state how we are part of the Earth and we should cherish it by joining in the environment. I assume that the chorus is after each stanza and it fits well for it is different for each and everyone one of us. This is a well defined lyrical piece and like you said it can stand also as a poetic piece for you give us thoughts to ponder on. First try and very well done. I also noticed how you have a rhyming technic in the first and third stanza and a different structure in the second and fourth. Was this intentional? (Earth, merge) (breeze trees), (flow, go) (way,day) then in the second no rhyme and in the fourth the last three lines rhyme. Thanks for sharing, Thomas	2007-08-24 09:36:38
Passion's Care	marilyn terwilleger	Marilyn, I love the setting, for the coast is one my favorite places and it relates so well with life. Ship's ride the sea, some return and others fade into the horizon. My favorite line within this piece your sails beguile the sea of silver-gray showing age has its place upon this setting. Well done. Thanks for sharing as always, Thomas	2007-08-24 09:09:42
love will keep us alive	Michael Bird	Michael, I see this as a lyrical song that comes from the heart. You will always look-out over the horizon from the bridge you and her created. Life is fragile but when a heart is touched it lasts forever. Love makes us stronger and we appreciate life much more. I do you crying out and you have shown us your deep eternal thoughts. Thanks for sharing. Did your wife submit poetry at this site and what was her handle? Thomas	2007-08-24 08:59:44
Watcher (revised)	Jana Buck Hanks	Jana, Yes the legion of warriors given up for the rest of us, we should all show thanks for their contribution to our freedom. Like the flow and the presentation giving the reader a feeling of moving along. Very well thought out piece that gives one time to reflect and reaches depth on the road. Well done, Thanks for sharing. Thomas	2007-08-23 10:29:47
Before I Sleep....	Mary J Coffman	Mary, Although this is also well written reading your 'Of Diamonds and Moonbeams' this has to take a second seat. The wording is to deep for me on this one and it detracts from the sense of the moment at least for me. Example your wording; I call back distant echoes of moments shared from hidden alcoves of my soul this wants me to here more about the soul, than the moment you are experiencing. Rain, tears, somehow do not blend for this reader, remember I am limited compared to so many others here. Thanks, Thomas	2007-08-23 10:05:38
Of Diamonds and Moonbeams	Mary J Coffman	Mary, I love how you paint a picture of a scene in the beginning it makes me want to go outside at night and look at the sky. Your use of colors and jewels gives the picture that extra touch making it a perfect moment in time. Excellent work. Thanks for sharing your moment with us. Thomas	2007-08-23 09:57:53
Slowing to Shade	marilyn terwilleger	Marilyn, Yes life holds what nature provides, and depending on the bloom type innocense is one form that can be taken. Wording is very good, thought provoking, format a little off for me but that is just me. I would have liked to see a two line completion to this piece matching the first stanza that would have made a bigger impact on at least me for I felt incomplete at the end. Just a thought. Thanks for sharing as always, Thomas	2007-08-22 09:34:54
The End Of Time	Dellena Rovito	Dellena, All I can say is I want more of this adventure you have taken. The darkness, the feeling of being small, the sounds... you hide away into a self protected covering. This is poetry yet I want more. Well done for if you hook me on a subject you have done your work well at least to this reader. Thanks, Thomas	2007-08-22 09:29:09
A Slow Dance with Death	Mary J Coffman	Mary, The additional notes seemed to help me understand this piece much better. My only issue with it is the format and presentation not the wording. When I reach the end of a line that drifts, I drift and fall into the crevasse that has been created. Remember it is only this reader speaking and other will have different viewpoints but for me my mind could not keep up with the presentation. Love the wording though for it makes one think of infatuation. Thanks, for sharing. Thomas	2007-08-22 09:24:12
Short-Changed	Mary J Coffman	Mary, Interesting and it plays right along with the worst boss category that was recently selected. The boss that won this devious award was one that threw away a cancer patient who requested a leave of absense, the worker had three children and I think the sole caretaker of them. Another winner was a Manager of a pizza establishment who told a pregnant woman that if she was to deliver she needed to do it on here lunch break and then come back. Like the rhyme in this and the thought behind it. It really is up to the individual to determine whether they will fall into the mold or be able to break away from it. Work, home, and life have many interesting aspects you have captured one. Thanks for sharing.	2007-08-22 09:16:59
Release Me	Rene L Bennett	Rene, Like the rhyme and thoughts presented. My only suggestion and a minor one is the format of the poem tends to run and not pause for deeper thought. If you broke this up to four stanza's it would smoothe it out for at least this reader. Maybe I am the only one this effects just a thought. Your showing of the costs, the mistakes might also go a little deeper for I see the surface not what is crying out from within. Enjoyed reading and like the rhyme, Thomas	2007-08-21 09:47:23
Mowed Over	Dellena Rovito	Dellena, You have the answer for our overweight population...We have gotten to use to the easy way of doing things. What memories you bring back I too remember the task of mowing the grass especially when a clump of grab grass, was needed to be mowed over...Well done for you have painted the picture and showed the comparison. (Most are to young to remember these days) Thomas	2007-08-21 09:42:27
My Lady	James C. Horak	James, You have a similar presentation as someone I have seen in the past at this site his name was Joe and he was a photographer. You both have a unique style in presenting love poems and those that relate to passion from within. This is difficult for most writers but you seem to have an ability to show it so well. I liked this piece for you show desire. Thanks for sharing, Thomas	2007-08-07 10:32:13
MAGNETIC FORCES	Debbie Spicer	Debbie, I remember so well when you first came to this site and the depth of emotion you displayed. You make a reader feel that hurt that as haunted you and no matter what one does it always comes forward into play. Life plays its tricks but has moments of peace that we can relish in. I felt the sadness inside this piece and it fits so many. Well done. Thanks for sharing enternal feelings that is what poetry is all about expressing them. Thomas	2007-08-07 10:27:28
Embracing Glory	marilyn terwilleger	Marilyn, As always a well written poem. You have expressed the feeling of forgiveness and the embrace of glory within this piece. The format is in an older fashion and may not be understood by all since they might be caught trying to understand the text and presentation. Just a thought. I do like this type of poetry for I am a Poe fan and his was in a similar fashion depending on the piece written. Just some thoughts. Thanks for sharing. Thomas	2007-08-07 10:17:18
Moonbeams	marilyn terwilleger	Marilyn, Now I have to try this type of poetry since this is a real challenge and you have done so very well. At first looking at the structure I felt that the rhyming sequence was off in the fifth line but you explanation explains it for the type of poetry created. Only the rhyme of that line was out of place but it fits perfectly into the poem. Can you split the poem with a blank line? Example: Open sky drops rain below Nips of light feed heavens glow Beams give sky an eerie show Every morn, dreams fade and stall Sun rays warm the ivied wall Thanks for sharing. Thomas	2007-08-07 10:08:34
Angel	Jana Buck Hanks	Jana, To capture a feeling and presense is difficult in poetry and you have done it here. What I like most is the blending of the stanza's that force to reader to continue on to the end. It is a nice transition and the presentation appealing. The visions you give are almost that of a dream. I enjoyed reading this. Well done. Thomas	2007-08-07 10:03:26
Criss-Cross	DeniMari Z.	DeniMari, What hurt held within, what sadness is felt, what being taken for granted is all about for some. These are just a few of the feelings you have given the reader. To release on paper is still holding the feeling within for it only releases a moment about the things being felt. This was a sad poem to read but it is what poetry is all about. Well done in expressing yourself. Thanks for sharing, Thomas	2007-08-07 09:57:27
traitor	charles r pitts	Charles, Like the structure of this piece and form selected for the subject. Each line leads to the next and the impact felt by the end. Each line stands on its own but provides the final feeling of coward. Well done, Thomas	2007-08-06 23:10:09
The Mask	Donna Carter Soles	Donna, Dark poetry at its best. Yes the question is asked but the mask is always present. What really hides behind the facade. Is it weakness that would be shown, is it a past, is it a want, so many questions yet the reality is there a mask to avoid being seen. Well done, Thanks for sharing. Thomas	2007-08-06 23:04:50
Poem Title	Poet Name	Critique Given by Thomas H. Smihula	Critique Date

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