Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

This Poem was Submitted By: Joanne M Uppendahl On Date: 2004-06-26 14:51:58 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!

Click Here To add this poem to your "Voting Possibilities" list!

Mother Sea's Recipe (Serves Two)

Toss fragrant layers of fern fronds with wild indigo berries, crisp vines, resinous pines, tangy spruce; then pepper black branches fold in sauce-thick grasses, top with whipped cream clouds over savory brown trees. Sprinkle generously with butter yellow blossoms. When mixture settles, blend with waves; slice egg-white foam with silver knives. Float wooden ships like chips on broth, garnish with salted crab legs and serve with sunset.

Additional Notes:
Inspired by a week in a cabin overlooking the sea.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Rachel F. Spinoza On Date: 2004-07-07 20:51:17
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.92308
Oh for a week in a cabin on the sea! Mother Sea's Recipe (Serves Two) love the title - serve's two is brilliant in its restraint given the enormous cook! Toss fragrant layers of fern fronds with wild indigo berries, crisp vines, resinous pines, tangy spruce; ah yes, a euphonious and succulent tea then pepper black branches [is this an imperitive? Wow love it] fold in sauce-thick grasses, [yes yes] top with whipped cream clouds yum over savory brown trees. lots ot chew on Sprinkle generously with butter yellow blossoms. shouns wonderful oh master chef When mixture settles, blend with waves; slice egg-white foam with silver knives. Float wooden ships like chips on broth, [yes!} garnish with salted crab legs [too specificly food I think] and serve with sunset. it sounds delicious. I will eat it with relish. Thank you for this treat Joanne.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Karen Ann Jacobs On Date: 2004-07-04 11:46:27
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.10714
I love this form. It’s complex but easy to understand. The metaphor is built in instead of saying, “Hey, this is like this.” You show it. The only thing that doesn’t seem to fit to me is, “Serves two” in the title. I guess it would fit if Mom didn’t take anyone else but her child. Which would be cool, too. It was just a part that made me pause. This is a poem that if I saw it in a magazine, I’d cut it out and put it on the fridge. The ending really got me. It gave that feeling you get when a puppy does something cute, you know, like breathing. Thank you, Kay-Ren

This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas Edward Wright On Date: 2004-06-29 20:46:49
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.44828
funny. i was thinking of using a recipe to create a poem... how that works. the mind

This Poem was Critiqued By: Joanne Duval Morgan On Date: 2004-06-27 10:56:11
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.75000
No cabin fever here, but a retrospection from an actively created mind Joanne. It's adorable, with a hinge of humore making it appear very tasty and appealing. Wonder spirts assail a senses, ponding the sea, it takes a romantic person to see and sense the glorious, taster and smell emeshed in the musing, and defty written, making it very adorable, and the reader wishes that vista and sense of time, and the beauty that surround. I know you linguistically managed this gem because of the inate ability to transpose you being into another setting, a most beautifully and adorable receipe, and I'll tuck my copy into my receipe box, and when the pressures of dealing with less then appealing situations arrive, or news as the soul wrenching news of Gary, but I take solice in Gary's eye view of these earthly surrounds, and the knowledge he's going into the real peace and tranquility of the woods, a setting he enjoyed beyond thought. Thank you for the pick me up, I really needed it today for Gary rests heavily on the spirit, and I wish it were possible to communicate once the eyes close forever, for He would be so indepth of love and appreciation of the bueaty you poems with such wonderful cadance alludes to. God Bless, Love and Good luck my Friend......Jo (Morgan)

This Poem was Critiqued By: Jennifer j Hill On Date: 2004-06-26 17:14:40
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Gosh, Joanne, I sure am hungry for some of "Mother Sea's Recipe". How great then it is that I can savor it right here anytime. What a fresh yummy read! Talk about a feast for the senses! I can see your romantic vacation for two was an inspirational success. A nice down to earth title to go along with an especially earthy read. You blow me away from the beginning with such sweet fricatives in fragrant/fern/fronds. Toss fragrant layers of fern fronds with wild indigo berries, crisp vines,----the “I” assonance is wonderful resinous pines, tangy spruce;----nice slant rhyme with vines/pines then pepper black branches----brilliant alliteration fold in sauce-thick grasses, ----fantastic imagery top with whipped cream clouds----even better imagery, and mouth watering! over savory brown trees.---delicious! Sprinkle generously with butter yellow blossoms.----luscious-sounding When mixture settles, blend with waves; slice egg-white foam with silver knives.----more “I” assonance works nicely here Float wooden ships like chips on broth,----and more slant rhyme with ships/chips and wonderful visual garnish with salted crab legs and serve with sunset----ahhhhh yes the alliterative sunset of Mother Sea. This is such a charming poem and ripe with language that just sends me over the edge into a fantasy of being right there experiencing it myself. Thank you for writing this and sharing it with us. And you can go a romantic trip to a cabin by the sea anytime if you’ll bring us home a little piece of heaven like this each time! Blessings, Jennifer

This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2004-06-26 16:21:03
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.70588
Hi Joanne, To think of your beautiful surroundings as a delciious recipe is nothing short of genius! Your talent never ceases to amaze me...as I read your work I often say to myself...why didn't I think of that! 'Toss fragrant layers of fern fronds' a perfect line to begin this recipe. Then you out-do yourself with...'wild indigo berries, crips vines, resious pines, (great rhyme in vines and pines)tangy spruce, pepper with black branches, fold in sauce-thick grasses...then my favorite...top with whipped cream clouds over savory brown trees' then...you sprinkle this wonderful concoction with butter yellow blossoms. Your cabin over-looking the sea must be such a wonderful place to be. I cannot help but envy you seeing such beauty all around. Then the directions for this amazing recipe...you blend it with waves, slice egg-white foam with a silver knife...no ordinary knife would be good enough for this exotic delight...you float wooden ships just like chips on the broth, garnish with crab legs and serve with sunset! My mouth is wartering with the images of such a place. If we didn't live so far apart I would be right over with my spoon! Al I can say is this is just another sampling of your prowess as a poet! Good luck in this month's contest! Blessings....Marilyn

This Poem was Critiqued By: Lennard J. McIntosh On Date: 2004-06-26 16:07:39
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.87500
Re: "Mother Sea's Recipe (Serves Two)" Here is a poetic serving to surely bait the most insensitive literary taste buds. I'm all set to consume what the earth provides - flora and fauna. It is splendid diction - delicious in fact. And, congratulations on the creativity of presenting this peace and wonderment as a meal. I cannot recall ever seeing this before. Good work, dear lady. And welcome back. Len McIntosh

This Poem was Critiqued By: Turner Lee Williams On Date: 2004-06-26 15:19:26
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.61111
Joanne--Welcome back! This whole metaphoric meal is too great to be hogged by just two-smile. By penning the "...Recipe" you've allowed the masses (especially TPLers) to lick the spoon and bowl. We also, now, know how to recreate this chef's delight for ourselves. The speaker's verbage alert our senses to what was so engaging to the poetess. Your fresh, bouncy, lively, expressive and colorful descriptors/allits create spectacular and vivid imagery while producing an enticing tone.The sea air and company seemed to have been agreeable to you-smile. TLW

Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

Click HERE to return to ThePoeticLink.com Database Page!