This Poem was Submitted By: Karen Ann Jacobs On Date: 2004-07-05 19:09:53 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Word Pirate

Harsh words shot off without a care, Across a sea-scaped screen, Careening from miles away. “No need to see me foe, To have at thee!” Slash with a phrase Cut with a term Gouge with a label “No quarter given.”  No quarter received. A word wound will scar, Unless it festers and brings death.  “Bleed thy translucent blood Over keys that clank in the dark. Avast and arg.”  Gather the bounty of innocence. Gloat for they cower.  All shrink before your name. Face the spray of respect from your wake. “Shiver their timbers!”

Copyright © July 2004 Karen Ann Jacobs

Additional Notes:
A.K.A. Kay-Ren Disclaimer: This poem was not written with any one person, or place, in mind.


This Poem was Critiqued By: arnie s WACHMAN On Date: 2004-07-31 00:08:56
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.18182
Interesting. Could be an internet relationship gone bad. Or a war of words carried on in cyberspace. One bad thing about a cyberword war, as opposed to a verbal one, once typed and sent, the words cannot be taken back...and anger and all else could escalate. An updated version of sticks and stones, but the weapons are keys and buttons and punctuation marks and computer screens. Like the style, old style language for a modern field of battle. Clever....


This Poem was Critiqued By: Wayne R. Leach On Date: 2004-07-23 19:12:14
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.94444
Nicely done, Kay-Ren. You have given us sights and sounds of the pirate's attack in this piece. Some nice alliteration and assonance, esp. in the last stanza. Interesting perspective of those who "steal" from the dictionary, and "throw" it at a piece of paper - or monitor. :>) I enjoyed that slant rhyme ending S3, too. A unique word with a unique purpose. Excellent and interesting piece. Thanks for posting. Peace. wrl
This Poem was Critiqued By: Erzahl Leo M. Espino On Date: 2004-07-18 21:04:15
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Hi Kay-Ren, Your words and images are like in an action movie (of Indiana Jones). With “foe”, old English “thee”, with “slash’, “cut”, “blood” and “avast and arg” – your playfulness with metaphors and similes are very evident! This is a clever move in associating “pirate” with those people who use or talk harsh words. “Word Pirate” is an intelligent title! The same with your phrase/s: “Slash with a phrase Cut with a term Gouge with a label” --- I sure enjoyed these ones! Great imagery, choice of words and combinations! “A word wound will scar, Unless it festers and brings death.” --- I can feel the truth in here! If we are not careful with our feelings and insensitivity, the words that can come from our mouth can sure create chaos. I remember the phrase: “A shut mouth gathers no foot.” and the Bible quote Proverbs
:3 “He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin.” This is such a reflective piece! It made you think on how you treat people and how you portray yourself. It is also the same way on how we comment and reply here in TPL. Sometimes we received harsh comments and rude replies that can either challenge or break the poet from continuing with the site. Thank you Kay-Ren for this insightful entry! I find this as a reminder to all of us! As always, Erzahl :)
This Poem was Critiqued By: Rachel F. Spinoza On Date: 2004-07-16 10:56:48
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
What a delightful mix of new technology and archaic language to create a poem that is fresh and alive with images Harsh words shot off without a care, Across a sea-scaped screen, [marvelous phrase] Careening from miles away. “No need to see me foe, To have at thee!” Slash. slash - yes the very anonymoty of the internet does provide for a slash and run attack A word wound will scar, Unless it festers and brigs death iIt sounds,, in this construction - as if festering and death are less serious consequenxes than a scar -a t least it does to me - ho wabout somehting like A would wound can scar or even fester an bring death I love the ending "Shiver their timbers!” Really dramatic and well conceived piece, Kay -ren
This Poem was Critiqued By: Joanne M Uppendahl On Date: 2004-07-09 19:08:13
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Kay-Ren: Lots of poetics in this very to-the-point caveat to writers in cyberspace. I don't think it can be emphasized enough that we can wound so easily with words sent almost instantaneously, especially to individuals that we do not know personally -- in their "skin" or as I say sometimes, 3-D acquaintances. I've been the recipient of words that stung, though that was not necessarily the intent of the writer. But as we cannot see nuances or expressions, it is difficult to know sometimes if someone is being humorous or sarcastic. Of course we all recognize the full-frontal attack, and I think that your poem addresses these less ambiguous encounters. Harsh words shot off without a care, Across a sea-scaped screen, Careening from miles away. “No need to see me foe, To have at thee!” Beautiful rendering of 'ee' sounds! Apt assonance in "shot off", deft alliterative sc's in "sea-scaped screen" and so much more. There is a 'speed' suggested by "shot off" which is instantaneous. "Careening" describes the rapidity of the barb and also, perhaps, the effects. We 'careen' when receiving such blows, dizzied by the unexpected. Slash with a phrase Cut with a term Gouge with a label --ouch, ouch! “No quarter given.” No quarter received. The lesson above is to the point. The results of 'flame wars' or individual emails can sometimes be devastating. It often happens in public forums. A word wound will scar, Unless it festers and brings death. “Bleed thy translucent blood Over keys that clank in the dark. --tres droll! Avast and arg.” --wry humor The second line above gives pause - can we say a word that will result in someone's death? If that someone is already depressed, and adds our hastily written chastisement to a list of reasons to feel hopeless, yes! Gather the bounty of innocence. Gloat for they cower. All shrink before your name. Face the spray of respect from your wake. “Shiver their timbers!” Heaven help me not to be the one who acts with such hubris. For even the mild-mannered, (such as this writer) it is good to be aware that our words can have unintended effects. Well done!! I enjoyed the pirate theme - the humor - and the terrific crafting. Now, I must ask myself if this boot still fits (it may have once) and resolve to do no further harm. Kudos! Best to you, Joanne
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