This Poem was Submitted By: Primrose Maclean On Date: 2004-10-31 23:23:13 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
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LITTLE WORLD, BIG CITY I carry this small world
So vibrant and colourful
Around with me
All of the time
And, as I sit alone
In this big city
With it's din in
The distance
I begin to enjoy
The confines of my little world
And how I can travel
To a monstrous town
To the serenity of the snow
And know
It'll still be there
To jeer
To cheer
To revere
Me and You
And the ugliness and beauty
Of the worlds we share
It'll be there.
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Copyright © October 2004 Primrose Maclean
This Poem was Critiqued By: Karen Ann Jacobs On Date: 2004-11-02 14:15:47
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.75000
At first I caught the initial picture you painted, and it was a very lovely picture, but then with the last few lines you gave the whole poem a yank that changed the colors. I’ve often sat and wondered at each person’s personal universe that they are the center of and I’ve wondered if anyone else sees that pattern. You do and you described it wonderfully. Thanks it is good to know that our universes overlap once in a while.
I especially liked the rhythm of, "To jeer; To cheer; To revere…."
Kay-Ren
This Poem was Critiqued By: Debbie Spicer On Date: 2004-11-02 11:20:50
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.92857
Dear Primrose,
This poem caught my eye and after I read and enjoyed it so much, I knew I wanted to comment on it. I am not sure I will read it exactly as you intended it but here it what it means to me. We all live in our own little world and we can make it exactly what we want. It can be vivid and effervescent if we choose or it can be dreary and ugly all depending on our view. Being anywhere, a big city or other places, we still carry our little world. I love the positive way you describe your world as colorful and vibrant, for that shows such a positive view. And you enjoy your little world, for it is yours to have and hold. You can perceive the big city as huge, gigantic, and to be there but you can look at that city and admire, laugh at, or be joyful in it, regardless of what it beholds. There are always both sides, our little world and the reality of the outside.
I loved the rhyming and the way you expressed yourself in this vivid truth. Great job and nice poem.
My very best,
Debbie
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