Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

This Poem was Submitted By: James Edward Schanne On Date: 2005-01-21 10:05:02 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!

Click Here To add this poem to your "Voting Possibilities" list!

A Laissez Faire Life

Acquisitions are pursued and persuade a gathering of artifacts congeal in characteristics they serenade collectibles of minutes passing deal all the little nicknacks of desire spent in occupation of wants that thought bartering with emotions inspire what couldn't be made but by spirit taught speculations searching out investment in times commodity market rising with age an ever higher assessment bids up compressed minutes for resizing payments are a constant in the doing while choices show up in the accruing

This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2005-01-31 07:31:57
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.76923
good structure, nice word flow, images of days gone by perhaps appear from the flare of your pen, I see ladies dressed in long flowing dresses, prim and proper, bidding for something they want, I see men in business suits perhaps projecting more then they really are in hopes this beauty might want them......over someone else.....hehehe.....I think you have done a grand job as always with your work and I thank you for sharing this with us....... speculations searching out investment in times commodity market rising with age an ever higher assessment bids up compressed minutes for resizing payments are a constant in the doing while choices show up in the accruing Good work, would not add or take away a thing....God Bless, Claire

This Poem was Critiqued By: Latorial D. Faison On Date: 2005-01-23 05:25:39
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
James, Again I say "How do you do this?" All of your poetry is marvelous, and I've read quite a few this month, but I don't like to critique unless I think I might have a firm grasp on the poem. The title of this one caught my eye, really as do all of your poems. I hope to get around to critiquing "Desermoning . . ." sooner rather than later. This poem in particular takes me back to the time when courting and finding a husband for women was a traditional task and the norm. Of course in many ares of the world, just not in America, it still happens this way. What I found most amazing is that you choose to merge the two issues of women and money. How clever were the terms and the language that you have used throughout this poem. It's amazing when you do that. Laissez Faire Life (As your title suggests it would be a fair life for women to worry about nothing but "obtaining" and "securing" through the act of looking for a gentleman. Although many women detest the idea of it all, more than enough enjoy the feat) Acquisitions are pursued and persuade (very nice ring to this line with the p sounds) a gathering of artifacts congeal (I thought it very interesting that you used the words artifacts to describe those things that we look for in a man's lineage to help determine how suitable he is) all the little nicknacks of desire spent in occupation of wants that thought bartering with emotions inspire what couldn't be made but by spirit taught (I think that you do a great job of merging materialism with emotions in this stanza with phrases like "nicknacks of desire" and "occupation of wants," adn then you come back with "bartering with emotions." Very rich terms. The elevation of the language in this poem,and all of your poems, is amazing, and it adds such a perfected air to the poetry and the topics being discussed.) speculations searching out investment in times commodity market rising with age an ever higher assessment bids up compressed minutes for resizing (This is the stanza where I thought you did an awesome job with the duality of the poem; "speculations searching out investment" this is such the task of fair ladies on the prowl (smile), and then the use of the phrase "commodity market rising" gave me the impression of men being a part of the NY stock exchange (smile), sounds facetious, but the similarities are there). Marriage was this big a deal, and it still is to many. It is something that shouldn't be entered into lightly. Long ago, during this day, women didn't necessarily look for love, they looked for someone who could take care of them forever. This is the underlying theme that I carry away from reading this poem. Excellent job with pulling this one together. Excellent. Thanks for sharing. Latorial www.latorialfaison.com

This Poem was Critiqued By: Kelly Denise LaBeff On Date: 2005-01-22 04:51:04
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.90909
Greetings Mr. Schanne, the Sonneteer of A Laissez Faire Life, who never fails to amaze me more and more with each verse you pen. The virtues of your sonnet, which are also a sonnet-perfect form requirement, are well noted in the perfection of your beat, meter, rhythm, and rhyme and that goes without mentioning your awesome use of alliteration in the phrased pursued/persuade and speculations/searching as each offers a resounding quality to lines 1 and 9. The only thing I can contribute is my belief [with a lot of emphasis put on BELIEF, too] that “nicknacks” should be spelled knickknacks as the k’s are silent when pronounced. Now, I’d be correct here less beyond my confines of totally being in the “dark”, you intended its spelling to be as is for the sake of effect and if so, do tell, okay? With that said, I must admit as a critic I’m unworthy to properly review this piece as its language, one of financial lingua franca, exceeds that of both my daily and learned dialect, but I will tell you what I gleaned from it if you promise not to laugh if I’m way off kilter and if I am, please, enlighten me...if you have the time as it is my intention to walk away from this verse as a learned critic or at least I hope to know more than I did beforehand. Do we have an agreement? Yes, right? Okay, I think I see you accepting these terms, but [hey] what’s that big cheese all about? You think, no, you just know I’m going to mess it up somehow. Well, let’s see; bear with me, J.E., because here we go: For starters, {The hunt begins...} I offer to you my interpretation of your first quad. Acquisitions are pursued and persuade a gathering of artifacts congeal in characteristics they serenade collectibles of minutes passing deal Purchases, goods, or ownership thereof is researched, sought out, searched for, hunted and tracked down and even bargained over or for if deemed necessary. Mission accomplished, the relics collected or better said selected for value set the tone [metaphorically speaking] as each features uniqueness in quality, thus they sing to the act itself. All of it, the time and energy spent along with the transaction or act of business itself, trade if you insist. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Next, {No holds barred...} I offer to you my interpretation of your second quad. all the little knickknacks of desire spent in occupation of wants that thought bartering with emotions inspire what couldn't be made but by spirit taught All the ornaments you want to acquire is a tiresome task, but for you the act of acquisitions alone is like a drug as it’s the only thing that brings about the true satisfaction you seek. Sometimes to fulfill your wishes, you have to haggling the dealer or seller in hopes to stir or arouse them with negotiating skills so a deal can be made to sell that one item that’s seemingly been otherwise unobtainable. This line, (what couldn't be made but by spirit taught), has me tripped as imo there‘s two possible outcomes. I don‘t know which one is right and who knows maybe neither is, here‘s one, my first, theory: #1-Negotiating continues, every trick in the book is utilized with skilled determination until the seller’s resolve is broken because deep within your soul you are the ‘king of persuasion’! No one can say NO to you, thus you always get what you want. If that’s not right, it could turn out like this theory: #2- Same case scenario as #1 up to the point of breaking the dealer‘s resolve- This time even your best efforts failed, so, you walk away with empty arms, but not as a failure for despite your empty arms, the strength of your mind along with your will and your soul is full, basking in confidence with the knowledge of a better how-to for the next go round. (Let me know which hits the target, I think the first is most likely) ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Then, {Decision time...} I offer to you my interpretation of your Third quad. speculations searching out investment in times commodity market rising with age an ever higher assessment bids up compressed minutes for resizing Rumors or office gossip spreads word about a possible change and you make it your job to look for a deal when goods increase in value to do what’s best for all concerned, sell when its high or hold on hoping for more growth with maturity being your focal point. Here’s another line, (bids up compressed minutes for resizing), that has me stuck as in my opinion two outcomes are possible once again. Nevertheless, here’s my 1st theory: You should sell some less wanted items and restock, thus resizing would mean get rid of some things now and restock later [or] here’s my 2nd theory: Although it would hectic, your bounty or chattels is pressed tighter in storage so you can acquire more, yet another costly item or antique whereas in this case resizing would mean taking on more and finding a place to store it somewhere, somehow. Again, please, let me know, but I think it’s the second suggestion. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Lastly, {The summation...} I offer to you my interpretation of your ending couplet. payments are a constant in the doing while choices show up in the accruing The only thing not changing is the money being spent as evidently such expense is both routine and often, a constant as said. As for the items, a collection of either a mass of one adored treasure or a variety of preferences still plentiful in quantity, but just a few, here and there, of each. At last as a whole the stock, ever increasing comparative speaking, is revealed because in the process of this inventory-like assessment, new acquisitions ceased, but only momentarily, I’m sure, however, the end result divulges a massive hoard of chattels. Well done as always, James, I took a lot of time on this one, determined to rise to your depth of language and poetic knowledge .. still didn't get there, not even close, but it was fun....If I'm totally off base with this one I going to Rachel's verse and getting her dishtowel to cover my face, her poem won't miss it! I'll really need it though....let me, okay?

This Poem was Critiqued By: arnie s WACHMAN On Date: 2005-01-21 17:57:40
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.72222
So, is winning better than losing in your l'aissez faire life? (BTW it's l apostrophe)...a small point here. Okay, guess you play the market. I used to but have retired and no money left to play with! I know that when I was able to play the market it sure wasn't a "l'aissez faire" game. I mean it was serious business. But you said it all very well here, and your title...well.... Thanks so much for your input. I enjoyed this repartie.

Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

Click HERE to return to ThePoeticLink.com Database Page!