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This Poem was Submitted By: Paul R Lindenmeyer On Date: 2005-01-31 16:46:55 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Poetry's End

To seduce the heart, living, fluid thoughts, acknowledged and distilled. Pensively published, seeking both acceptance and immortality. One heart's hope, in search of all others....

Additional Notes:
Repost due to poor poetic proofing.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2005-02-03 17:51:19
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.67568
Paul, My second response..... I once posted and unposted a poem 7 times. Twas a mighty expensive poem indeed! I've seen only a difference in the title. I could be wrong. It was actually kind of cool. But I suppose we must conform. What tickles me is how familiar another's poem can become to me! I feel very intimate with your thoughts and wording of your poem. As if the essence of one is shared with another. So when it's said we're all connected/poetry does that job quite nicely... Or maybe it's your blessed way with your particular thoughts? I believe your Poetry's End has accomplished it's goal [for me], to be accepted and enjoyed. I find nothing to correct. You have a very kind heart, Dellena

This Poem was Critiqued By: arnie s WACHMAN On Date: 2005-02-02 18:46:09
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.52381
Well, I can see nothing gramatically wrong with this piece so you're good to go as they say. Could you not have said, "To seduce the heart and soul." I think that would encompass the whole being as we know it or think we know it.Seeking immortality through writing is not something I would even think of, but it's a thought. I'd have to think on that one. So you put your heart on your sleeve, as they say, in hopes of recognition and imortality? Nice, but pwrhaps vain...I wonder if Shakespeare thought that way. Thanks for your point of view.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2005-02-01 13:20:52
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.70312
Certainly looks and reads well my friend, enjoyed each stanza with its emotions and images. Thanks for sharing again with us, God Bless, Claire

This Poem was Critiqued By: Mell W. Morris On Date: 2005-02-01 13:17:22
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Paul: I have spent some time now with your title. I read as most literists here do: the termination, demise, death, cessation of poetry. Then having read the poem numerous times, none of that fit. Aha! I say, I must have the wrong import. End might mean goal or aim here. Or it might refer to outcome, the ultimate state of an entity, or the result. I personally like the last one, result. It would then tell the reader that the aim of poetry is: To seduce the heart, living, fluid thoughts, acknowledged and distilled. And that's exactly what a grand poem will do, entice the heart into deeply feeling and replete with *fluid thoughts.* Taken into the reader with a doff of the cap and distillation. I marked "fluid thoughts" for that is a superlative phrase. You consider and think of publication of your poem for it would bestow upon the poem, acceptance and the big one, immortality. One heart's hope, in search of all others.... I do comprehend the hope of the heart; in fact, I would assume almost every heart has a modicum of hope...for something. You imply that one aim of the poet is to find a kindred heart/spirit. I believe that occurs daily when poetry is read or mayhaps I am placing my feelings atop yours. That is not my intention. I long to discuss poetry with another poet and I used to take lit classes at SMU and UD, especially poetry seminars, for that goal. I am unable to do that now but the true passiuon of a poet is not to be underestimated. I have, upon occasions when I was not thinking of caribou cordon bleu, felt the same creative spark in another, the melding of minds, ans it's lovely. I cannot imaqgine a poet here who would not relate to this poem of yours. I find it unique, I of the inquiring mind, and thoroughly enjoyed each word. Kudos, Mell-O

This Poem was Critiqued By: Kelly Denise LaBeff On Date: 2005-02-01 03:18:33
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.96875
Paul, This is a splendid verse. In search of all others/one heart's hope...is found, it's found in the finding of...OH! Beautiful! The meaning, its depth, behind/beyond the words speak volumes...of yes,,,acceptance and immortality! Picture perfect: Poetry's End! If only to be gotten, then all else falls into place! Isn't it amazing how saying so little, says so much! You did here! Amazingly so! Kuddoooosss to this poet! Thanks for sharing, Kelly

This Poem was Critiqued By: Lennard J. McIntosh On Date: 2005-01-31 23:55:59
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Re: “Poetry's End “ You’ve created an arresting aura with a bare paucity of words, Paul. “To seduce the heart,” *** This is an attention-grabbing phrase, that in most circumstances would have a sexual connotation. Yet, in this poetic setting – not at all, as it’s clearly understood in a literary sense. "living, fluid thoughts, acknowledged and distilled.” *** These lines describe well how poets reach out to touch just the precise notion, and to consider and refine it, as entirely as distilled water. This poem even unfolds, a cool and refreshing quality, that’s rhythmic, pleasant to the ear. “One heart's hope, in search of all others...” *** This is every poet’s quest. What works to craft the depth of this piece is a writer opening the window to his heart. It does so with an honesty, abundant enough to bring a packed auditorium to a hush. Paul, you have eloquently written what every poet feels. What could be more poignant? Good work and congratulations! Len

This Poem was Critiqued By: Turner Lee Williams On Date: 2005-01-31 22:31:54
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.83871
Paul--IMO, the initial post was scribe's original and personal subjectivity of "Ars Poetica," therefore, a heartfelt genuine rendering. After having written that mouthful and perusing this revision, I can easily see it has been tighten: the poem appears to have lost some extraneous words, making it terse and more precise. Also, the new layout is more pleasing to this reader. Although I like both versions, I prefer the repost. TLW

This Poem was Critiqued By: Joanne M Uppendahl On Date: 2005-01-31 16:55:35
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Paul: Well, I missed the first one. And I'm grateful for this one. Especially for the message of the work, as opposed to what I originally thought the title made reference. Not the 'end' of poetry, as in ceasing to be, but as in goal, result or ultimate purpose. Ah, but you have it, precisely stated, and so well that to reiterate it here would be redundant. (Not that I have ever shied from redundancy before!) I think you've said it all -- the quintessence of all written verse, perhaps. One heart's hope, in search of all others... Those final lines say it all, for me. You've caught me with your words on the page. This is sublime! Bravo, poet! Best to you, Joanne

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