This Poem was Submitted By: Mandie J Overocker On Date: 2005-06-07 01:00:24 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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One day the truth will be known One day the story will be told One day A lifetime of fear Erased day by day Dissociative  Flying away Escaping the knife The threats to her life To her mind  There she goes To return  No one knows A piece of her dies With every new lie A new part created  To replace the one lost Her captors aware Of such pricy cost A soul enslaved A body engraved Scars speak the truth Louder than words Blood pouring down As life spins around Confusion is met with a stare A blank mind again A new piece begins An old part dies away Frozen in time Each tiny part Holds a puzzle piece To the whole story The truth will be told Fear will not erase it  Today Today the truth is known  Today the story is told

Copyright © June 2005 Mandie J Overocker

This Poem was Critiqued By: arnie s WACHMAN On Date: 2005-06-23 11:33:28
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.52632
Interesting style to this piece. Line to line it works well. Simple and effectively written. The title fits well. Apparently this woman was held captive by someone and tortured with a knife. Not enough to kill her. Was she raped? You don't answer that. Who is this woman? You don't answer that. You mention, today the truth is known - what truth? You told the story but it is very enigmatic. I wish that you could have mentioned these things in the notes at the end of your story. Was it you? Was it some gang of thugs? Perhaps a viscious husband. You did start the story saying one day the story will be told, and end it with Today the story is told. Well, not entirerly. Thanks for this mystery, and it is a mystery. Now, to see what others have said.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2005-06-08 14:21:51
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Amanda, I left void of words to describe the inexplicable feelings this awoke in me...the deep compelling feeling to reach out and just hug someone, words can not soothe these feelings but perhaps knowing that there are others who care and feel the pain, confusion can help. Thank you for sharing such a deep work with us. Lora
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2005-06-07 06:53:35
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Powerful poem poet.........even with its one stanza structure the read went well, your rhyme was good, held interest, the words gave way to images, though this could run in many directions.........fear......I know the consequences of fear in my own life.....a horrible way to live.....the experience painted within my friend is is good that the person ( wil not assume this is referencing you) lived to tell of such an experience.....most likely taking longer then one actually can be able to put on paper the words to express the pain associated with this is therepeutic I would hope and pray. A most difficult piece to write and I do hope you have had your day in court and the person or persons causing this harm have been punished... thank you for posting......God Bless, Claire
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