This Poem was Submitted By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2005-11-11 18:35:07 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Daylily

In the wee bursting hours  of the morning sun in my cottage garden bed, privately, typically away from my line of sight,  the daylily blooms. Hot hued colored bold, flashing its brightness, displaying a golden-throated  center with stamens and  pistils erect, poised  to validate existence.       Wading through the depths  of one full day of eminence beholding what it sees, intimately experiencing the  elements: sky, wind, rain, earth and most essentially the sun. When the moon rises high  in the sky and the suns gone  once again till dawn,  the lily succumbs. Fresh, wearing old,  a day of life unfolded  too quickly, according  to the span of man.   The existence of this  one single bloom upon the stem  gives cause to celebrate.

Copyright © November 2005 Dellena Rovito


This Poem was Critiqued By: Duane J Jackson On Date: 2005-12-03 09:07:33
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.60714
Hi Dellena, I enjoyed this. You have taken the bud of nature and given it bloom in this flower-bed of words. And thanks to the fertile ground of your artistry, the end-result is a flower that is at once endearing. In the wee bursting hours of the morning sun in my cottage garden bed, privately, typically away from my line of sight, the daylily blooms.---- reminds of how we tend not to notice these gems of nature Hot hued colored bold,---hot hued (fine alliteration) flashing its brightness, displaying a golden-throated center with stamens and pistils erect, poised to validate existence.--- now if i had to read this in a science text book- stamens, pistils, etc- i would have been most uninterested; it's amazing how poetry turns it around - golden-throated center is nice! Wading through the depths of one full day of eminence ----indeed, when a flower blooms, it blooms whole-heartedly beholding what it sees, intimately experiencing the elements: sky, wind, rain, earth and most essentially the sun. When the moon rises high in the sky and the suns gone --- [sun's] once again till dawn, the lily succumbs. Fresh, wearing old, a day of life unfolded too quickly, according to the span of man. --- span of man --sounds nice off the tongue The existence of this one single bloom upon the stem gives cause to celebrate.---- and celebrate we ought to...we are so caught up in ourselves...you remind us.Thankyou!! Well done, Dellena!! Take care, Duane.


This Poem was Critiqued By: Jennifer j Hill On Date: 2005-12-02 08:44:51
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Dellena, When I saw the title my heart gave a little leap and after one reading, this one did not disappoint. After many readings I am enamored. The energy of "bursting" in the first stanza propels the reader along through the vivid colorful descriptions that put the reader in awe. Then you put us smack dab in the garden as the daylily to experience all that it does. This piece is a celebration of a day in the life of a lily, of the world and of life itself. Great writing, and BRAVA! Thanks for sharing this one. My Best, Jennifer
This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas Edward Wright On Date: 2005-11-24 22:22:24
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.25000
In the [] bursting hours in my cottage garden bed, my private daylily blooms Hot hued, colored bold, flashing bright, gold-throated stamens, erect pistil poised in promiscuity Fleet feet of day beholds elements: sky, wind, rain, earth; most essentially: sun. With moonrise [this needs work] lily succumbs. Fleetingly, One solar sigh One day of life One single blush upon the stem Then gone awilt. I think you need some sense of speed, and fewer words. The magic of the daylily needs to be concentrated by boiling away the unnecessary. Keep working on this potentially great piece. tom
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2005-11-17 00:24:40
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dellena, Daylily [such a soft and inviting title] In the wee bursting hours of the morning sun in my cottage garden bed, privately, typically away from my line of sight, the daylily blooms. [here you’ve set the stage, now I await with anticipation to see where your nature play will take me] Hot hued colored bold, flashing its brightness, displaying a golden-throated center with stamens and pistils erect, poised to validate existence. [such depth of description colors the mind with a full spectrum of sensual hues] Wading through the depths of one full day of eminence beholding what it sees, intimately experiencing the elements: sky, wind, rain, earth and most essentially the sun. [how very fitting for one who has been described in such a sensual way, much wiser is this product of nature than man, it holds dear what it has at the time not waiting to see what will come] When the moon rises high in the sky and the suns gone once again till dawn, the lily succumbs. Fresh, wearing old, a day of life unfolded too quickly, according to the span of man. The existence of this one single bloom upon the stem gives cause to celebrate. [truly one of nature’s wonders, it wakes and it sleeps, and yet it seems so much more than mortal man, in it’s self it celebrates life, in this we recognize on a lesser level but understand enough to celebrate also] This is so soft, sensuous and yet it rushes the reader on to see what happens next. You caress the sense’s with your well penned words and massage the sleeping parts of our mind to awaken to a new understanding of the cottage garden and the gem it holds. This was an unexpected delight and much enjoyed. Thank you. Warmest always, Lora Copyright © November 2005 Dellena Rovito
This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2005-11-12 17:19:17
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi D., To me this is one of the most beautiful poems you have ever written and it is one that captures my heart. I use to have a very large bed of daylilys and it always saddened me that they bloomed in all their glory for all to see then wilted and died. Your word choices in this piece are delicious and depict what a lily like this might see on the day it blooms. I love the way you take this flower from the moment it blossoms into the evening when it goes away...but in the end you celebrate this lovely flower and that makes this poem so special. I know one other thing in nature that has only one day to celebrate and that is the mayfly. Do you know of it? They hatch, mate, and die...what a way to go. Maybe the creatures that do this have such a glorious time or an exhausting one that one day is all they need. Great poem...loved every word! Blessings...Marilyn
This Poem was Critiqued By: Joanne M Uppendahl On Date: 2005-11-11 19:50:17
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dellena: I love this poem because its symbolism evokes joy for me. The quiet, unseen daylily blooms “hot hued colored bold” as do we. Taking our brief time as time extended infinitely, we enjoy our “one full day of eminence.” The way you write this makes me feel that “one full day” is enough. It is complete in itself, even if unseen or away from the writer’s “line of sight.” Perhaps it is her physical manifestation, perhaps it is her soul. In either case, its beauty cannot be denied. I love this: “poised to validate existence.” But I love this more: intimately experiencing the elements: sky, wind, rain, earth and most essentially the sun. Yes! Maybe we will be unheralded, but perhaps existence itself is enough. Experiencing the elements, and “most essentially the sun” you show that we are part of a great light ourselves, whether we can see our personal light as significant or not does not seem to matter in this poem. It is the act of being oneself in the time allotted that counts. The lily is often seen as the symbol for life, death and rebirth. I think you more than hint at these associations in this lovely poem. You remind us to have faith, though in essence, while we are in the physical body, at least some part of us is also in the process of death. Fresh, wearing old, a day of life unfolded too quickly, according to the span of man. A lifetime for the lily is brief, according to our measure. To what greater beings is our span a mere flicker? If our bodies are “wearing old” are we not yet “fresh” in the simplicity of our inner being? I think you ask these questions here. You show that our spans are relative, and that we are of a substance as remarkably enduring as that of which our local star, the Sun, is made. The existence of this one single bloom upon the stem gives cause to celebrate. You show the eternity in the moment of a single bloom, the reason to celebrate our lives full-heartedly and with all of our passion, because we are part of the unfolding life of the elements which make up the universe, “most essentially the sun.” Brava! Well done, once more. My best always, Joanne
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