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A Tattered Poem (Somewhat more than usual) I think I know what built Stone Henge: Time tokens, mystic monuments, maybe just Gandhi Cool-Aid. Ever know anyone with a plan?...not to get rich, famous, bridling fury with some bit to the teeth? But a real plan...something opening minds, Opening them wide, perilously wide? Did I mention Gandhi Cool-Aid? Henry Troper, had it down to an art, Collecting so meticulously. 28,373 jars, coffee cans, tubs, worth. You couldn't stay in his car...not even Near, on hot summer days. Unless diaper hampers had you customized. Storage buildings, closets full...don't Open any doors too quickly. Henry knew Science and God weren't counting Well...that he could do better. But he knew They knew, Collectively knew, When the oceans were all pissed, The world would end. I think I know what built Stone Henge. |
Additional Notes:
Back in your teeth.
Lovingly, JCH
This Poem was Critiqued By: Rene L Bennett On Date: 2008-02-14 23:34:49
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
James,
I don't know what your other critiques were but I like it!! I am just now experiementing with free verse and I can only hope my words flow as yours! Thanks for leading me to this piece, I read it twice! Your ending was superb!! Perfect!
Always,
Rene'