This Poem was Submitted By: Deborah L Bird On Date: 2006-03-17 08:34:10 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
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Song of the Faeries When summers' light fades from day
You hear crickets softly talking
Chattering hellos into the night
Fireflies winking all around you
Faeries singing their songs of magic
Dancing joyfully
Watching wee ones scamper off
To seek gentle arms and warm kisses
Of earth's angels
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Copyright © March 2006 Deborah L Bird
Additional Notes:
this is a revision of the old one. thank you all for your insight.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2006-04-01 18:32:17
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.70588
Deb,
how softly sweet.
I've not seen any fairies myself, but I imagine them so sweet!
This is almost innocent and childlike.
Oh if the world could be as such!
And we could use the magic.
Nice, pleasant read.
happy day,
Dellena
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2006-03-28 20:57:01
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
With Spring bursting forth all around us.....I am still waiting for it to arrive here in Tully........this poem is a refreshing breath of air...........I do not recall the original posting but this one certainly is well done, filled with sounds and images for all to see, feel, find. Thanks for posting and sharing. God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: arnie s WACHMAN On Date: 2006-03-17 16:25:12
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.41667
Well this certainly is nice to see that you took my suggestions. Either way though it's a fine piece and a find (if you get my drift). Thanks for this.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2006-03-17 10:47:06
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.93333
Deb,
You did a fine job on rewriting this one, definitely tighter, also breaking into sections highlights the events for the reader....makes for a smoother read.
best always,
Lora
This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas H. Smihula On Date: 2006-03-17 08:43:31
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.90000
Now you have structure and flow created by this wonderful poem. I enjoyed reading it this so much better. Each break helps give thought and a picture leading into the climax of the last stanza. Well done. Thanks for sharing it once again with us.
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