This Poem was Submitted By: Jordan Brendez Bandojo On Date: 2006-05-14 15:58:21 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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To Mommy

"I'm sorry", Mommy! Sometimes I failed to keep your command. When you told me, "Don't do this or that!"  I often transgressed what you impart. I should have  followed all your advice For they shape my being Yet sometimes I pursued my boisterous actions. Please, forgive me, Mommy.  "Thank you", Mommy! For everything you've done for me For letting me see the light  And experience what is morning and night. You could have killed me when I was still an infant Or aborted me when I was still in your womb.  But because you love me so much You cared for me till I grew up. If you were not there, what would my life be? "I love you", Mommy! Your love for me is beyond compare. I can freshly remember my childhood, When I needed a thing, you sated my craving. When I called you, "Mommy! Mommy!"  You were always there to give me a hug. When I was thirsty, you handed me a glass of water, at once.  When I was hungry, you quickly gave me a plate of my favorite food. When I was sleepy, you affectionately lulled me to sleep. I will forever treasure your kindness, Mommy. "God bless you", Mommy!  May the Almighty give you more energy, That you can keep on bestowing your kindness and generosity Not only for me but for everyone you meet everyday. 
Copyright © May 2006 Jordan Brendez Bandojo

Additional Notes:
Happy Mother's Day to all mothers here in TPL!

This Poem was Critiqued By: Nancy Ann Hemsworth On Date: 2006-06-05 10:06:38
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.85714
I find it interesting that you have started this piece with an apology!! I guess we all feel you have come somewhat short of what was expected of us..even though we have been loved and nurtured and cared for..why the regrets I wonder? You have had a much happier relationship with your mother from what I can tell from this write..but no matter the experience I have from your first stanza realized that we all have the feeling of failure to some extent. I like the innocence of this piece, the feel of childhood throughout and enjoyed your lines. thanks for sharing.

This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2006-05-19 14:23:48
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.75000
Dear Jordan, Your poem is intense. A quick read, that depicts inner feelings of a child to their mother. I enjoyed this read, but the structure through me off a bit, some of the lines seemed to long. I've always been told here, to loose unnecessary words, which has been the best advice ever given regarding my writing. You have captured the essesence of the jobs moms take on, raising their children. We somehow, have to do it all, and most of us manage quite well. Last verse rings true, energy is necessary - and I often ask God to give me that, plus patience, the patience of a saint in order to complete all of my tasks. It's been the most rewarding experience of my life, to have been mother to three. Thank you for paying tribrute to moms everywhere. Sincerely, Denimari
This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2006-05-16 23:24:15
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 2.00000
Jordan, This is so niuce. It rings of childlike innocense. [your use of Mommy] I like your apreciattion of her promptness. it means a whole lot. She set her works or fun aside to do for you, showing your importance and value. How blessed you are! And you show your love to her right back. Mommies worth their salt are kind and generous people as a wholle. Good job sharing your Love. It's needed today. Dellena
This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2006-05-15 15:02:45
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Jordan....This is such a lovely poem written with the most profound love for your Mommy. I hope you gave this to your mother on mother's day...I could cry from reading the words and I am not your mother...so I can only imagine how it made her feel. I think she is lucky to have a son like you. From your poetry and your critiques I can tell you are such a sensitive soul with a big spoon full of kindness thrown in for good measure. You said all the things in this poem that any mother would love to hear and thanks for the Happy Mother's day you sent to all of us. Peace...Marilyn
This Poem was Critiqued By: arnie s WACHMAN On Date: 2006-05-15 11:01:36
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Well, I'm not a "Mommy" but I can relate as a Father. I was trying to recall my Mother who died some 23 years ago and I couldn't recall one good thing. Sad as that is. But your title is that of a child yearning for the Mother...that kept me reading. Yes, your Mother could have aborted you, yes your could have killed you (how gruesome a thought), but she didn't, henceforth this lovely tribute to her. Feeding and nurturing you it seems that she was a great Mother. And it seems you turned out just fine. Just one little glitch here in tense:But because you love me so much...But because you love(d) me so.. That is all... Arnie
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