This Poem was Submitted By: stephen g skipper On Date: 2006-05-23 03:16:43 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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To dream of sleep

Now is the time to sleep but scared of what my dreams shall bring Recently, filled with a need to believe in the vaunted afterlife Can I afford the cost of my absolution? Those we have wronged should set the price Does the ferryman provide them with punitive advice? Payment deferred from our previous life My soul would have to have a rucksack to carry all the cash required to bribe Gods bosun and be spared from the lash (Who was it that sang Gershwin’s Summertime to me when I was but a babe?) I’m a rabbit caught in guilt’s harsh headlights Darkness of the bedroom lies heavy on mere mortal man Night-time silences echo loudly Is dreamless sleep the domain of the truly innocent?

Copyright © May 2006 stephen g skipper

This Poem was Critiqued By: Nancy Ann Hemsworth On Date: 2006-06-05 10:02:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.85714
wow!! do I ever like the ideas you have presented in this piece...and not one person could not relate to this piece on one level or the other. I like the mention of the "ferryman" this coming from Egypian death beliefs I think?? perhaps I am wrong, but I recall it of some culture..and the fee, from the release of pugtory (not likey spelt proberly"LOL I am a terrible speller.. So within this piece you have made the dreams the demons that reak our soul. I think the idea of "In dreamless sleep the domain of the truly innocent?" is an excellent question, observation and you have certainly made this reader ponder..

This Poem was Critiqued By: Kenneth R. Patton On Date: 2006-05-31 05:37:26
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Wow, you have captured the late night feel of my mind racing. All our shortcomings are magnified by the dark silence. But I find that dreamless sleep provides no rest. Thanks for this thought-provoking entry. Kenp
This Poem was Critiqued By: Jordan Brendez Bandojo On Date: 2006-05-27 22:46:21
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.77273
Hi Steve, I was intrigued by your title "To dream of sleep" - something that stirs one's mind who would want to dream of sleep. Or is this a metaphor or idiomatic expression? That's what came up first in my mind! And there you go... Now is the time to sleep but scared of what my dreams shall bring --- sometimes I also find a hard time to sleep because I was afraid to get a nightmare. <smile> I had this nightmare that really bothered me so much! I like the association of ferryman, bosun, all about maritime... "My soul would have to have a rucksack to carry all the cash required to bribe Gods bosun and be spared from the lash" Simple thought yet unexpected and compelling! And the ending is effecting by throwing a question. Thank you for sharing this us, Steve. Keep them up! Jordan
This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2006-05-24 14:45:21
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Stevie...I am glad you are have been away from us for way too long! I feel so much unrest in this poem...not just because it is about dreamless sleep but the reasons you allude to for not sleeping and therefore to dream. You are probably not as guilty of you think you are. We are our own worst enemies. I don't think there is a soul alive that can live up to the lofty goals they set for themselves. And they shouldn't be. We must keep striving to do our best even if our best is sometimes wrong. That can be rectified, you know....."night-time silences echo loudly" is an elegant says so much in so few it. In fact every line in this poem is signifigant and well written. I too have trouble sleeping...the trouble lies mostly in going to sleep rather than staying there. Well written poem that is laced with anguish. Glad your back! My best...Marilyn
This Poem was Critiqued By: Joanne M Uppendahl On Date: 2006-05-23 10:27:39
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Steve, If dreamless sleep were the 'domain of the truly innocent' then none of us would sleep! There are a lot of intense thoughts in this poem, which sounds like you had a really difficult patch, trying to get to sleep while thinking of a lifetime's perceived errors, and fearing dreams can really one awake. In the time before sleep, when nothing occupies the mind, dread of unconsciousness seems a metaphor for dread of death, and uncertainty of what comes after, you show us here. I would like to see a whole poem on the theme of who it was that sang Gershwin's Summertime to you as a babe. There are a lot of worthy ideas here - perhaps a bit scattered, as are our thoughts when we can't get them into the delta rhythm preceding sleep. I'd really enjoy another poem on the outcome of that night's effort to slumber, and especially, that childhood memory of being sung to. Best wishes, Joanne
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