This Poem was Submitted By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2006-06-13 15:10:13 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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I Believe

I believe in gossamer angel wings And softness of fairy breath. I believe in ecstasy of utter love And calm of death I believe in purity of a baby’s cry And serenity of prayer. I believe in rainbows with pastel hues And trailing clouds flair I believe in trees shivering song And blue in a boundless sky. I believe the aria of a mountain’s throng And smiles on a child’s face But most of all I believe in His Radiance and colossal grace

Copyright © June 2006 marilyn terwilleger


This Poem was Critiqued By: Jordan Brendez Bandojo On Date: 2006-07-04 21:57:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.76923
Hi Marilyn, I believe in everything that you say here and I believe in your writing. Write on. Take care, Jordan PS. How's the weeds over there? (Smile)


This Poem was Critiqued By: Ellen K Lewis On Date: 2006-06-26 15:34:50
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.94444
Hello again Marilyn! This is a nice work. I love the first verse! angel wings and fairy breath... I think you could do something with 'calm of death'....and the calm that comes with death?...just a thought. I think alot of our poets may consider that a very straight-forward and abrupt end. Perhaps it's better that way. Like I said, just a thought. and trailiing clouds flair....hmm...soft, gentle clouds there?...more for thought. Another rhyming word that you may be able to apply would be 'air'.. Tree's shivering song...wow! that's great! I like the idea of trees shivering. That's unique. And of course, the ending is Perfect!!! I think we share the same belief's. I love this little poem! smiles, Ellen
This Poem was Critiqued By: Turner Lee Williams On Date: 2006-06-23 11:27:47
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
marilyn--IMO, these are all enthralling remarks depicting scribe's/protagonist's personal/philosophical spectrum of some life intrigues. Although, most renderings are hyperbolic, the most adamant is the sharing of a pious faith; "...But most of all I believe in His Radiance and colossal grace" The entire verbiage creates vivid imagery for all the senses. I have no suggestions for improvement. Thanks for sharing this uplifting work. TLW
This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Andrew Hislop On Date: 2006-06-19 09:18:08
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Mazza Much as I love you ... ... goddamn it, you've written (very nicely, of course) The List of Things I No Longer Believe In. Well, not today at any rate. Today, I believe in pain, injustice and inscrutability. Obviously this means I should read this poem only when I'm better disposed towards the world. But I am always well disposed towards you... ...even when I vanish for long periods. Lotsa Mark
This Poem was Critiqued By: Nancy Ann Hemsworth On Date: 2006-06-16 05:15:21
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
This is so lovely and wise...such a soft and light feeling to this piece which so suits your subject. "I believe" repeative throughout was an excellent way of presenting your ideas here..makes the reader stop and take in your words. Makes everyone of your beliefs stand out so well, and they are wonderful beliefs . Some people go through life not knowing what they believe in their life journey and keep on questioning. But I do know this much "But most of all I believe in His Radiance and colossal grace" ..lovely and spiritual write marilyn and lovely images as well."I believe in rainbows with pastel hues And trailing clouds flair" and here again in "I believe in trees shivering song And blue in a boundless sky. I believe the aria of a mountain’s throng And smiles on a child’s face" This poem stimulates the senses, not only the eyes..but all the others..
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2006-06-13 20:08:33
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Marilyn, How delightful and so full of promise. Loved your clean clear verbiage and the pictures you painted with it. This reminded me of the song Presley sung, this such a well articulated statement of praise, love, compassion and faith. I especially like the line "I believe the aria of a mountain’s throng". I wonder how many really hear the mountains aria. Thank you for sharing, not one nit here. Warmest always, Lora
This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2006-06-13 18:38:33
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Dear Marilyn, I Believe, is a strong title that leads us into a tranquil piece, full of inspiring phrases. You have used a nice rhyming scheme, ie: breath, death, prayer, flair, and it blends well, between good structure, concise verses - I especially like, fist line 2nd verse... descriptive of purity of baby's cry - captures the essesnce in this poem. The last two line of this are my favorites, as I believe, just like you do! Rhyming of face with grace - fits - not forced at all. I can't find, any flaws in this poem - I feel you will do well with this post this month. Sincerely, Denimari
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