This Poem was Submitted By: Mark Andrew Hislop On Date: 2006-06-22 19:08:31 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!

Click Here To add this poem to your "Voting Possibilities" list!

Landmines

On what remains of the earth of Eden, jackboots rage, jealous for imprinting it with the It of Buber, to Cleanse the World. In trenches through our holy paragraphs, the Gestapo march with divining rods to poison water with crouching metal, lime the evidence with myrrh, frankincense, and give praise to godless philosophies. Born in the sixth millenium, under the sign of the Processor, we're the freaks of stack-overflow error: now, even sacred words explode behind our own lines.
Copyright © June 2006 Mark Andrew Hislop

Additional Notes:
More cryptic rubbish from the desk of MAH.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2006-07-02 18:00:31
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.37500
Mark, I loooooooooovvvvvvvve cryptic rubbish! [I guess] I feel the anger of the ways of the world! You don't walk alone. I'm right beside you. I get upset of the total bs of everything. Never are we encouraged to have our own thought and judgment on matters. We are taught to believe whats taught. so how do we ever trust ourselves/ we are freaks! to poison water with crouching metal, lime the evidence with myrrh, frankincense,[love the thought of covering up poisen] Our Eden needs to be reborn/redone. Great job! Dellena

This Poem was Critiqued By: Terry A On Date: 2006-06-27 17:21:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Mark, This poem has touched upon a sore point with me. Every myth, metaphor, significant detail that helps to give life meaning, absorbed into the vast mind control broadstream mass media to sell things. Worse to condition the mind to meaninglessness, dilute the quality of thought that offers huge avenues of exploration, explorations that actually take people places. One thing I have learned is that its never like "they" say. Polls, surveys, are designed to herd opinion. The vast variety that actually does exist on this planet exists outside of mainstream media, and is evident just by talking to people. But you say it so much better then me, in this poem. Your poetry is superbly connected to this age; and not at all cryptic. Terry
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2006-06-26 19:43:37
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.92000
Mark, Cryptic maybe, depression maybe, and even anger felt here. Age old battles and hypothesies that go around in circles, the questions asked, the answers seen and words mouthed that just don't do anything. You've heard it all and you still rage at the things that go bump in the night, a lonely battle you fight and only you can control the outcome. OK, I know that was not what you were looking for however I don't feel that I am capable of giving you what you want to hear. Your structure/form/verbiage----yada,yada,yada---is as always impeccable, for this I admire you. I wish there was something I could do to help you put light to the dark spot you are climbing into. Take care, we are what we speak, put forth your light and it will shine on you also. Thanks for letting us into your thoughts. Best always, Lora
This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2006-06-24 06:49:27
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.86364
Hi Mark.....this poem is thought provoking, to say the least. I have read it several times in the last two days and each time I find something more to appreciate. It is not rubbish as your note indicates....but rather it is profound and intriguing. I feel anger here but don't ask me to explain why....it is somewhat obscure but certainly well written. On the surface I think this poem is about persecution of the Jews but is there more between the lines? Does it, in some way, mirror your own feelings of persecution? I have to admit the caps on some of the words confuses me....but then so does life, if I let it. Warm hugs....Marilyn
This Poem was Critiqued By: Ellen K Lewis On Date: 2006-06-23 11:40:00
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Oh another eye opening poem! I really like this. A timely piece of today, from a poets perspective, it's the nicest gift you can give to 'the people'. On what remains of the earth of Eden,>>(I think I want to cry) jackboots rage, jealous for imprinting it with the It of Buber, to Cleanse the World. (I don't need to understand the "it of buber" to know that this is pure violence and ignorance going on) In trenches through our holy paragraphs,>>Awesome! these words punch and sting-very good! the Gestapo march with divining rods to poison water with crouching metal,>>>hmmm..sounds poetic but I can't 'see' this...I understand the intent of these words far better than I can picture them. Of course, I have no first hand experience to help me understand. lime the evidence with myrrh, frankincense, >>>great play on words! and give praise to godless philosophies.>>> a very clear statement everyone understands! Born in the sixth millenium, under the sign of the Processor, we're the freaks of stack-overflow error: now, even sacred words explode behind our own lines.>>you have shared the pain with me, and caused me to see it from an individual perspective. I think alot of people need to see this! This is a news flash for me, having no understanding except for that which is released in the media. Very clear feelings, expressed powerfully. I sit in awe. The graphics in this work sink in slowly as I try to understand. I'm not sure about your line structure, ie., punctuation. I know that some will consider it incomplete, or incorrect, but I think it is fitting for this piece and so I will leave it alone. I am curious though, why did you capitalize "Cleanse the World" ? Rubbish? No way! This is a great eye-opener and a thought provoking read. I would really like to see more of this 'stuff'! Please continue to share!!!
This Poem was Critiqued By: James C. Horak On Date: 2006-06-23 08:28:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
It saddens me to see one so talented, intellegent, intellectual, gifted... capable of copious display of original imagery and constant exhibition of poetic soul, the least bit into self-deprecation. This is a wonderful poem except for the little "note" for which you've poisoned it. Mark, you've commented about your therapy sessions, your undetailed problems (I might guess with bouts of depression or whatever.) Let me be brief. At the first signs of such "problems" someone in your life, and I would have had I been your big brother, taken you out to a bar or sand lot and shoved you into the biggest, meanest bully I could find. If you tried to get away, I would threaten to beat your ass if you did not face them. Yes, you would probably end needing a little patching up...but I promise you there would have been an end forever to these "problems" and self- doubt would no longer plague you....ever again. All civilized cultures have rites of passage and just about all have elements like the one I suggested. But as we, as a culture, grow more and more "sophisticated" we adopt a different kind of savagery. Your poem detects that, doesn't it. So do the math. Blow that fucking therapist off. And I wouldn't use sixth millennium references. Ethnic timeline differences confuse computers. JCH
Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

Click HERE to return to ThePoeticLink.com Database Page!