This Poem was Submitted By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2006-08-27 10:35:12 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Less Is Never More

Arrested more or less by being bound to me Sitting half-way through my life in perplexity Suspended weights roll over life  Time nudges to set this spirit free Beauty love spared silence looms Chances shooting over spinning moons Cowardly dance to music in light Yet privately dances all through the night Arrested by, attested by, no more no less than life Dream encounters angels sing Rebirth liken a morning spring Children touch the breath of life Place me up on your precious wings Trust knows silence blows The essence captures then lets go Arrested by, attested by, no more no less than life

Copyright © August 2006 DeniMari Z.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2006-08-28 12:59:03
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.82759
Deni, You've torn at my heart with this indepth intimate poem, so powerful and so diverse from your usual writes. My heart cries out to you and would sit and keep you company through this if it were possible. My prayers will continue for you and your family, and I applaud you for putting your soul on view as you have with this write. Thank you for entrusting us with your heart. Many blessings, Lora

This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2006-08-28 10:26:37
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Denimari...I have read this poem so many times and each time I see the melancholy between the lines. You have every right to feel sad at this time in your life and you have done a superb job of writing your heart out in this poem. The end rhymes are good and the flow and structure is flawless. "Arrested by, attested by, no more no less than life" what a profound and true statement this is. The line..."Place me up on your wings" reads like a prayer or a desperate plea for the sorrow to end. This piece is so different than what you usually write. We come to be familiar with a poet's style and when it deviates we sit up and pay close attention to what the poet is saying....this poem does that for me. You get an A+ for this one and red roses too! Hugs....Marilyn
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