This Poem was Submitted By: Mark Andrew Hislop On Date: 2006-11-19 17:35:33 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Leaving the abbey

Simple, clear and piercing -  like all your words - your new goodbye to vanity arms worldliness anew. Without your sanity’s art, its gentle guiding from smug profanity to self-reflecting, what will your brothers do? Pray that all our reaching, brother, finds its north true like your humanity.

Copyright © November 2006 Mark Andrew Hislop

Additional Notes:
You will be missed.


This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Steven Scheffer On Date: 2006-12-07 22:33:19
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
MAH, You knew him, Horatio. Sorry. Wrong Dane. Keep a cig tucked away in the corner of your box for me. Ain't smoked in about 7 months, and never shall again. Unless I bump into you somewhere. Keep those matches dry. Best, buddy. No "mates" here. MSS


This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas Edward Wright On Date: 2006-12-05 21:20:35
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.80000
Who? Who left? Scheffer? That ink-blot. I'll ... dC
This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2006-11-26 18:30:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.75000
Mark, Leaving church, leaving religion? A place that seemed to help you. Keeps you sane, helps you self reflect... Hoping you can find your way without that help! Of course you can. If you stay in tune with yourself. After everything fades away you are left with only yourself. Another thoughtful poem causing introspection. Cool...... Dellena
This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2006-11-20 14:48:43
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.90000
Hi Mark...I was excited to see you had written a poem...but I feel I can't do it justice. I don't know who you are speaking about here and maybe that is your intent. But I can tell you that you have written this with emotion and passion. It has such a melancholy feel to it so I'm thinking someone or something has left you. It could be your wife but I don't think so...or a good friend...or perhaps your muse. All of which would be sorely missed by you. Your last stanza is very sad to me....what is worse than losing your north? I remember I poem I wrote about a lighthouse. One line says....bewildered sea birds lose their north...or something to that effect. Anyway I am thrilled to see you are writing and I hope this is not just a passing fancy...that would make me weep. I hope you and all of your family is well and what ever has kept you away is gone forever. Lotsa...Mazza
This Poem was Critiqued By: James C. Horak On Date: 2006-11-19 17:53:04
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Mark, I can't properly critique this since I've no clue to whom it is in reference. Still, I'm somewhat obliged to remark on the elegant simplicity to be found in the verse, "Pray that all our reaching,/brother, finds its north true/like your humanity." Holding back on that unbridled creativity to effect marvelous imagery, you've exampled a new maturity here. Appropriate to the solemn theme (I guess) in this case it is a gathered restraint. I do hope, however, you will not spare the wonderful imagizing in your next offerings. Hope you and yours are well, JCH
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