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This Poem was Submitted By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2007-04-08 17:15:52 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Sorceress

Phantoms only she sees give her dress its lace, hope brings youth an aura. Her light persuades over the brow of earth, nudging shade from corridors. She slows mountain streams, opens her gown of Champagne hues rippling over expectant earth. I watch and wait, her beauty slips inside my breath. She coaxes petals from their bashful fold sees them breathe and flaunt colors. With fasted eye she polishes window panes and sashes with honeyed rays of light; inhaling the wind, blows back soft whispers that blankets grasses whose eager seeds welcome her murmuring aria, then swaddles Magnolias in a leafy frock. My smiles warm as she pushes somber clouds away; no rain erases blue this blue. Quiet and fixed, I watch magic-- ancient sorceress; Summer

This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2007-04-22 02:07:28
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.75000
Marilyn, I found this very pleasing to the spirit, gentle and soothing and at points it did make me a bit restless, wanting to be under sky instead of roof, to wander barefoot in summer grass's. So many vivid pictures are left to dance across my mind and I am savoring them. Thank you for the balm to a weary spirit. Best, Lora

This Poem was Critiqued By: Nancy Ann Hemsworth On Date: 2007-04-13 06:59:00
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
oh this is so lovely, so enchanted and one can see all this that you speak of unfolding as you read. I would see all your images and felt the romantic flow of the words . Soft and lovely this poem of approaching summer. I love the metaphore of the "sorceress"..my favorite line, is your single line that really stands alone "I watch and wait, her beauty slips inside my breath." for it is so true, the magic of the coming of warmth and summer days does do this..leaves one breathless to the beauty and awe of this world..thanks so much for sharing this with me on this "last snow storm of the season" I hope..cross your fingers for me OK.. Nancy

This Poem was Critiqued By: Terry A On Date: 2007-04-12 23:15:06
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.50000
Ah Marilyn, A marvelous tribute to the spirit that seems to guide and empower the beautiful elements of summer. Nature spirits were, still are, believed to abound in natural settings. Very effective descriptions all aid the flowering of abundant season. I like nature, I like nature poems, and this one is most enjoyable and well-done. Terry

This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2007-04-09 09:45:13
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Beautifully penned poet.....your words have once again brought such beauty to life........images galore, My smiles warm as she pushes somber clouds away; no rain erases blue this blue. what a beautiful thought..........but then poet you always pen with your heart. Thanks for posting, God Bless, Claire

This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Andrew Hislop On Date: 2007-04-08 22:52:52
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Mazza I keep being struck by your new inventions. This is punctuated with startling expressions: "Her light persuades/over the brow of earth,/nudging shade from corridors", and "no rain erases blue this blue". These seem to me to be fresh and original turns of phrases. I'd like to see you keep more of that intensity and compactness in stanzas 2 through 5, but that is of course a bit idiosyncratic of me. Or dogmatic? I find it so hard to tell. Lotsa MAH

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