This Poem was Submitted By: Debbie Spicer On Date: 2007-07-29 23:47:30 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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I relinquish myself each time I gaze into your eyes,   perceiving feelings never recognized before.   You're spirit pierces my heart completely,   with a yearning that refused to retreat.       I have found tranquility, which has come from no other,   unrelenting exclusively while you are in my sight.    Confusing emotions and yet powerful they actuate,   decided devotion held intimately within me.        You overflow my spirit with assurance and purpose,    with uniqueness which I privately can't deny.    Having a passion for you may only be an illusion,   you are not within my reach; yet the desire will not pass.     I am perplexed and intensely bewildered by you,   knowing the boundaries are unyielding between us.   I have searched laboriously to find peace and balance,   now this discovery has taken me totally unprepared.       You've brought out desperate and profound feelings,   more than anyone has ever touched in an eternity.            As intricate as reality is, they arise evident to me,   affection for you, forbidden, yet I desire for it to ensue.       This commitment is not ordinary in ways expected,   perhaps only requesting that you love me as I am.   For what I desire from you is respect untainted,   a tender touch and the comfort of you close by.     I know it is infeasible to experience all of you,   by virtue of who you are and the limitations set before us.   You have supplied me with adventures to glance at life anew,   I honestly didn't anticipate this love I have for you.  

Copyright © July 2007 Debbie Spicer

Additional Notes:
A poem I submitted years ago but stays on my heart.

This Poem was Critiqued By: James C. Horak On Date: 2007-08-07 12:31:55
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
"For what I desire from you is respect untainted", the key to the concept of the woman's "forbidden affection". Sadly it is in the female psyche an enculturation towards self-defeat of idealistic love through seduction. Even towards father figure, even towards the ultimate "forbidden". Did you intend to give that away...and to the watchful eye of one as me, that clashes with most romantics who have persuaded themselves such things cannot be? And have you grown so well you would not despise that which might so inadvertently fall prey to your charms...even were it inconsistant with "respect untainted". Even more so, if it were to not? That would place you well above those of your sex who rarely ever profit off what they pursue most. In the differences between how men and how women come to be abject servants to their senses, are there any that really matter. And is ever the "forbidden" anymore than self-betrayal. Most of all, though, are you going to deny what's behind your intentions in writing this? A rich poem, rich most in honesty and in the aspiration to reach poignant truths seldom touched. JCH

This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2007-08-05 12:17:08
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Debbie, having found the theme throughout poetry- reading yours gives me pause as to the object and resolution. It seems unrequited, and yet not in a onerous way, in a wistful, I see where I am, but there is still magic somewhere- way. With the structure of the piece, it eases the reading, but it is truly free verse nonetheless. There are few rhymes and I believe those are incidental. You end with a couplet, and that rhyme reinforces your despair/thankfulness of this verse. Since it is ostensively free verse and rhyme doesn’t seem to hinder construction, a couple of suggestions: On the line “For what I desire from you is respect untainted” – it would read better with “untainted respect”. Your hammer line “You have supplied me with adventures to glance at life anew” is a bit awkward. I think you can edit it, make it flow a bit better, and really hammer home your feelings and affect. I would ensure, however, that you keep your rhyme with the last line- “anew” or some other rhyme- it adds power to your verse. The feelings you raise throughout this verse are quite universal. As I sat and read through several times- the piece took on character from those times- I too recall. thank you for sharing!!
This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas H. Smihula On Date: 2007-08-03 09:15:41
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Debbie, Can't remember if I saw this previously but it shows much emotion and the craving within relinquishing the past with hope and contentment. My only suggestion is the double spacing detracts from the flow but it doesn't effect the wording. I enjoyed reading this as always well done. Thomas
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2007-08-01 07:45:24
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.76190
Good morning poet I pray this finds you well; it has been some time since I have seen you post and I might add it is nice . This read may take one in many directions so far as the forbidden affection. Your words flow well, your pouring out your heart and soul knowing this can go only so far.....thus I have a feeling it has a spiritual side to it as well......perhaps you have met a man of the cloth who you confide in yet in those times your own feelings have awakened in a way you never thought would. I had a friend once (he is now in God's Heavenly Garden) it was the priest that officiated at my wedding in 1965. I loved him from a distance yet each chance I had to talk with him, be with him, I grabbed. You might also speak of a friend who is married therefore not available to you and since this is an older poem perhaps he still has a special place within your heart even today. No matter which road you speak of it is well presented, images, emotions, you have touched on it own spirit wants me to add that perhaps this is a conversation you had with God........He is our best friend you know and even though He is out of reach He is always by our side and certainly loves us as we are........thanks again for posting, take good care, God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: Paul H. Roefs On Date: 2007-07-31 04:28:56
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dear Deddie, This is a wonderful poem on boundless love, commitment and devotion. Your love for your man is succinctly put in a warm and gentle words that intertwine you both. The imagery is so clear, loving and caring. You have shared with us your deepest feeling in a warm poetic way. The great expectations of the most important person in our lives comes true as we give more to them. The magnitude of thier jesters bring momentous enjoyment that lasts for a lifetime. I love your poem very, very much in deed. Good job, Bravo!!! Best to you, Paul
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2007-07-31 03:29:35
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Debbie, So complicated are these matters of heart...never know why we feel as we do and why it happens when it does. Excellent piece from your pen to the heart of your reader. No nits here, just a few moments out to travel old memories of "Forbidden Affections"... Best always, Lora
This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2007-07-30 15:37:18
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.85714
Hi Debbie....I remember this poem! It was lovely the first time I read it and this time it still holds allure for me. It is written with deep emotion and passion which makes it a joy and a mystery. Written in free verse it has a smooth flow like liquid down the page. Your word choices are excellent and reminds me of how much I have missed your poetry. I have tried to pick out a line or phrase as my favorite but cannot without doing an injustice to the rest. So let it suffice to say this is wonderful and I do so hope to read another poem from your talented pen. Love....Marilyn
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