This Poem was Submitted By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2007-08-08 15:58:56 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Passion's Care

If ever I shall wander shores again when seabirds sob then soar beyond the night, while sad hearts hearken echoes and sustain, then shall I sense the warmth of heaven’s light? The morning’s diamonds with the trees be drawn when gardens gleam and shine in glancing rain, will I then hear your steps in peeps of dawn or will your ship be gone on tides again? I watch the ocean’s sway with tumbling spray an avalanche of foam enchants the shore; your sails beguile the sea of silver-gray, on hazel sand I wait your muffled oar,   deny the dingy water of despair   and hope to sail again in passion’s care. 

Copyright © August 2007 marilyn terwilleger


This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2007-09-04 00:50:45
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.28571
Marilyn, This is again quite lovely, Your descriptions of the earth, sky, and it's creatures is so poetic. You are very talented. And always your heart and soul cry out love lost and love again. Wonderful, I await ever same as you.... Dellena


This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas H. Smihula On Date: 2007-08-24 09:09:42
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Marilyn, I love the setting, for the coast is one my favorite places and it relates so well with life. Ship's ride the sea, some return and others fade into the horizon. My favorite line within this piece your sails beguile the sea of silver-gray showing age has its place upon this setting. Well done. Thanks for sharing as always, Thomas
This Poem was Critiqued By: Rene L Bennett On Date: 2007-08-12 00:11:23
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
I am so glad I came back to this site after about 6 years. I have never read such beautiful poetry and writen with such heart and beauty. Your's in no except! Great write! Rene'
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2007-08-10 15:41:28
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
What a sight you paint with the flare of your pen and the emotions presented are all so strong. Brings forth many thoughts and places to go......feelings to be felt hopefully once more. Thanks for posting, God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2007-08-10 10:36:23
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Narilyn, Simply moving in all that you present. Your choice of verbiage paints vibrant alive images and pulls at the heart. May I make one suggestion; on your closing stanza would you considered starting it with "Then shall I" for this would personalize it as you have with all your other stanzas... I could linger in the moments you've presented here for the whole of the morning...brava. Best always, Lora
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