This Poem was Submitted By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2008-08-08 15:22:15 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Early morning sun fell upon his rhyme, words whispered across the page. He wrote with a fickle pen and her tears, that echoed in hollow corridors. Sounds of her sighs fell on languid ears her breath strewn on gossamer strings of light. Her fingertips brushed the shallow verse,  he penned in sorrow’s dress. Her too deep tears mingled with his words, that whispered like Sparrow wings across the page. Her hand reached to hold whispers of his rune, in a drop of time threads of passion bound her crystal tears. He held his quill, wrote an ode of love to her, woven with whispers inside his rhyme.

Copyright © August 2008 marilyn terwilleger

This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2008-09-04 20:30:23
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Marilyn, Pretty nice, sad, lovely. Always the thread of love and sadness as is true for you. Very nice. Her fingertips brushed the shallow verse, he penned in sorrow’s dress. Her too deep tears mingled with his words, that whispered like Sparrow wings across the page. I know the feeling of soft sweeping wings touch.......nice. I'm impressed. Dellena

This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2008-08-30 20:08:03
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Marilyn, Just what the doctor ordered, you give my mind a chance to escape with your well crafted pennings, images that linger subtly in thought to contemplate and linger on. Unusual, haunting, somewhat forlorne in a nice melacholy way...a lazy summer's afternoon read...very enjoyable. Best always, Lora
This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Steven Scheffer On Date: 2008-08-18 09:00:27
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Marilyn, Nice to read someone who has a true lyrical voice, a sense of how words, sounds, rhythms, syllables build like atoms. Keep 'em coming. MSS
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