This Poem was Submitted By: Rene L Bennett On Date: 2008-10-27 03:44:21 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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If I Had Known

I often think of yesteryear's yet, reality confirms my fears. If I had only known it was our last day I would have asked you to please stay. By your side I would have been sharing memories of days when. We would share some laughs and shed some tears counting blessing for our years. Gentle touches, hearts which beat precious moments our souls to keep. Your look, your smell, your sweet taste not one "I love you" would we waste. I'd hold you close, as close could be with your warmth embracing me. If I had only known it was our last day I would have asked to you please stay. Yes, I often think of yesteryear's yet, reality confirms my fears.

Copyright © October 2008 Rene L Bennett


This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Steven Scheffer On Date: 2008-11-04 15:59:00
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Rene, This has nothing to recommend it to me. Sorry. MSS


This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2008-11-01 14:58:46
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.33333
Filled with emotions, and images of another lifetime....someone you dearly loved and perhaps still hold in the lining of your heart. Your words flow life into the meaning....of love....Your look, your smell, your sweet taste not one "I love you" would we waste.....this must have been a most difficult piece to write and I thank you for posting and sharing with us.....it makes one feel blessed with the life they do have.....I am sorry about your loss. God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2008-10-28 18:42:33
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Rene, I like the idea and the rhyme. I would have liked different spacing. Maybe 4 line stanza ending with the last two lines as a finale. It reads easy as it stands but the spacing gives a moment in between to contemplate. Your look, your smell, your sweet taste not one "I love you" would we waste. I'd put would be waste. Good job of sharing your inner thought. Dellena
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